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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/kippeake
Review Requests: ON
39 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Fish Bait  
Review by kip
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi Anne

Great Story... Well concieved and executed

I loved the theme, natures revenge against the ravages of man.

The use of folklore gave the story more depth and intrigue. The title was perfect, clever line, I don't want to give anything away.

There was some very nice imagery in the climax near the end.

I hate to say this because it goes against my usual opinion, but I thought the story could use a bit of a hook in the begining and was a little slow with unneccessary details in places.

What I thought the story lacked was in character description, how they looked, perhaps giving them some unique/defining attributes. I think the dialogue could use a little work.

I enjoyed the story, I love giant monsters and ancient Gods...



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Review of APRIL  
Review by kip
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Sherri

That's, "April" all right! Very cute and cuddly poem, well except for the taxes part...

I can almost feel the spring in the air.
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3
Review of What a Dog!  
Review by kip
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Autumnrose

Lively and entertaining... you have a true gift for story telling.

I was very impressed with the eloquence of your wording and the depth of character development.

I also like that your story had a point, a moral lesson that seems desperately needed in our time.

Keep writing
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Review by kip
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Meriki

Very expressive and powerful piece of emotional depth, I particuraly admire the way the poem comes full circle ie. the way the last line ties it all together.
5
5
Review by kip
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi Shelby

Very intriquing drama, nice dialogue. I like the way you included Wiccan magic in the piece gradually... and naturally. But I think the strongest part of the story was the characterization. The characters seemed like real people and their emotions very real.

The story could use a little editing...
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Review of The Hunters  
Review by kip
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi CC


Very cool story, werewolves are my favorite supernatural creatures. I really liked your description of the hunt, especially the part about their hearts beating together. I love the fact that you included the transformational fur coat in your story, a little authentic occult/folklore knowledge always improves a story, in my opinion.

Its a very nice little tale, but I think it needs conflict, and conflict resolution to be a full story.

I really enjoyed reading it.

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7
Review of Dearly Beloved  
Review by kip
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
This is wonderful Nikola,

Great characterization, very touching... was this from a prompt? I only ask because of the edition of Poe's "The Raven," in the story.

Its nice to read a story about a devoted and loving husband for a change. A man with a good heart, who is willing to make personal sacrifices for those he cares about.

Thank You for sharing this...
8
8
Review of Remedy  
Review by kip
Rated: E | (5.0)
"Remedy"

Love and obession, haven't we all been there...

Remedy is a touching treatment of the symptoms of the lovesickness. The breadth, an depth of this poem cannot be measured by the number of its lines. It can only be measured by the depth of feelings it portrays.

Lines that touched me:
"Yours is the only
voice that makes a sound"

"I cannot breathe without
you to be the air"


9
9
Review of Touch Me  
Review by kip
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Darkness

This poem touched me...

The plea to be touched is stirring, an emotional need we all feel; the line draws us in, like a fish hooked by the lip we are drawn up into the boat of sorrow.

"Touch Me." is very sensual, it explores powerful emotions chained to sexuality and strife.

The last line seems to sum up this poems exploration of the depths of emotion within a relationship, while the last line seems to me almost is a summation of the poems exporation of female sexuality
10
10
Review of The Crow  
Review by kip
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Arakun

This is brilliant, great flow, natural rhymes and a deep meaning.

This a very well crafted poem, I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Lines I especially liked:

Bright-eyed feathered bandit
who covets things that shine,
Clever trickster spirit
to some, a deathly sign.

Write On...

11
11
Review of Pumpkin Patch  
Review by kip
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Pennywise

That was a very original story, I thought he was going to get away! I think it could use one more rewrite, not to change anything but just to make it flow a little better.

Was that idea from a prompt? Anyway, I thought it was very creative and original concept. With some suprising plot twists which are always good.

Thanks for sharing that, I enjoyed it.
12
12
Review of Voodoo Moon  
Review by kip
Rated: E | (5.0)
Very Cool...
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13
Review by kip
Rated: E | (4.5)
Excellant piece

Something I think almost everyone here can relate to, your honesty does shines forth in this article. A worthy effort at self examination and a hope all of us share, especially us newbies.

Thanks
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