I enjoyed reading your poem very much . It was quite cute. I do think the rhyme was nice,but, I think the rhythym could be better. I say this just from my first reading. It is quite cute though. It made me think---yes, about socks.
I enjoyed reading your piece very much. Your intro was very good and kept me reading, the conversation moved the story along nicely, your word useage was usually very good. I would do a proofread and reform some sentences. You might explain things better than using 'viceversa'. But, for the most part I like your piece.
The opening to your piece was well chosen, I really liked it. The basicsare well acomplished here with good conversation that moves the piece along and nice word useage. It evoked feelings of sadness and finality.
Wanted to bring to your attention:
you feel it’s best for you.= is best for you?
Keep it up!
Khaynne
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I enjoyed reading your piece very much. Cute story. You have used good word useage, conversation that moves the story on and the storyline is done well. I think the ending could be a little longer, it seems abit abrupt to me. Nice work!
With this compelling opening you get into your character right away and get the reader interested. Good conversation that moves the story along and is realistic. This is a great start to your story. I would be curious to see where you go with it.
I liked this piece very much. It was very different and was handled real well. It worked well and the structure was slick. Fine word useage. I wouldn't change a thing. You make it look so easy.
I really enjoyed reading this piece. You have a very unique writing style. The plot was very interesting and kept me reading. Your characters were intriquing and believeable. Your word usage is not over done and it does work well.
Yes, this did hook me right away. Wondering what is going on. Nice descriptive words used. It evokes a unsetlling feeling in me. I think you did very well keeping the suspense alive until you felt it was time to let us know. It definitely worked. You did a good job. Enjoyed reading this.
WOW! This is a nicely written piece. The conversation moves the story along. Ifind no typo and that is always nice to see.(you should see some of the text I look at)It evokes alot of different feelings such as sadnees, unbelieving weird feeling of I am not sure what is happening which isn't a bad thing.
Your first senttence is intriguing and draws my interest. Your conversation moved the story along well. Does this sentence really make sense to you?:
The small group made haste through the woodland, still and frozen in silent emptiness. Otherwise after the comma might be a thought. Just my opinion.
Here are some ideas. Just my opinion and hope it helps.
Need to do a proofread. I think you can find something more than 'I replied.' Use some descriptive word there or? Definitely makes me want to read on and see how the meeting goes and what else you do with the story.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading your entries. Your writing evoked laughter as well as joy that only animals can bring. As far as your writing technique is concerned you have a very nice flowing style that keeps the reader interested. What fun!
I enjoyed reading this very much. Three lines that say alot and seem to have alot going on. It was short and sweet. It evoked a nice feeling. Well written. Hope you add more later. Nice discriptive phrasing, and all works well. Is it for an entro or?
I enjoyed reading your piece. It is well written, structured and has nicely flowing conversation. Looks as if you did a good proofreading and editing before submitting this as well. Always a good plan. Good use of descriptive phrasing. This story really works and is very unique.
This was amazing. Structure be damned. It is always great to see what is happening in this world of ours. I am sending a minumal amount but something. Thank you letting meknow about this. There is someone outside fighting over some stupid ego thing. Isn't life something?
Well, as far as I know I do not do any of the things you mentioned. I enjoyed the check up though. Thank you for the grammar website as well. It never hurts to check if you are not sure. I never went to college and am sort of a self taught writer. Scarey,huh?
Good story. First sentence could just be: David wrapped his frozen hands around a scorching hot cup of coffee. You are very descriptive. I think you could do a proof read and maybe edit out some of the wordage. Very insightful if not a little sad. And I do love a happy ending. Keep on.
Khaynne
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