|Hello 2014, readers, and anujmathur,
First, before I tear this to pieces, I would just like to say I sorry to have to start your year off like this, but, if its any consolation, it really did start like a good work in progress. That said let's look at what you did right and then lose our minds as we look at the other three-fourths of this unnatural disaster.
The story starts and we meet our main character, Vikram. He's a writer with a couple odd ideas, but will address those in a minute. He decides to apply for a job to get into the head of a chef for inspiration for his main character. As the description on the story suggests something more exciting than that is going to happen so I'm expecting a writer-gets-taken-on-an-adventure story. As this is chapter one I'm not expecting the full thing right now, but I'm expecting a something that will get me wanting the next chapter. What did I get? The most boring, worst written, choppiest story I've ever had the misfortune of reading.
I love stories where a writer gets pushed, pulled, or unwittingly get involved in a story. This story has that potential at the start, but it is completely misused.
The problems are there from the start and they are painfully obvious. Vikram thinks a story can make him billions (I'm not going to list everything wrong with that), instead of going for the job in the kitchen he whats to hire a chef instead, and he faints really for no reason. The restaurant that he gets to work for has no customers, an insane chef, and a manager with no staff (I'm really trying not to list everything wrong with that alone). Just when you think this can't get worse it does.
An alien shows up and does nothing, but this alien does make Jar-jar Binks a much more enjoyable, and believable, character. I going to spend a little time on this thing just to help justify my statement. First off I have no problem with the odd colour scheme, or shape, that the author is going with. One big problem I have is the fact that the main character thinks the alien could pass for a human. Because lots of humans have just one eye, are pink and yellow spotted, and float in the air. The alien also speaks every language on earth because his native language has 1,528,328 letters...letters, and the alien then says and I quote, "...I'm sure a few hundred thousand must have been added since I've lost contact." Last time I said that I was talking about a video on youtube. Oh and get this the alien is also suffering from short turn memory lose... while still knowing every language on the planet that he learned after he learned the thing that he has now forgotten.
And then there's a time machine... it's just there... doesn't do anything... just makes the chef look dumb... and make the alien that much more unbelievable. The worse part about the time machine is that it was going to be used to further the story in a cool way, but no, the author thought that it would be better to have awkward dialogue to further ruin the story. The terrible part about that is that it was suppose to be fun, the category that this item is listed under is comedy.
And that is my review of The Writer Muse.