This is totally delightfully funny. Had to read it a couple times and each time was funnier than the one before. I have no corrections to suggest. It grabbed my attention and away I went right to the end of the poem as if I had slid along on that squirt of cheez. Thank for the smile you gave me.
Wow! Do I understand that! I have been to that place and my writing also suffered. I have stopped writing so I can make money and eat and buy what I need. But the pleasure that comes from writing is not there.
You said it so well. So glad I came to visit.
This short Haiku says so much in so few words (as haikus do). Almost tempted to write a review in Haiku. but I will say that writing a Haiku is quite an endeavor and you did superbly well on this one. I love it. I have never written one although I have written poetry. Thank you for the read.
What a delightful poem to tickle the imagination of various pictures. The rhyming and rhythm is great. I love trees too and remember as a kid I would climb any that looked climbable. I particularly liked the part "Bark for the woodpeckers' tommy-gun sound."
Wow! This was totally intriguing. I had to chuckle at the open window, never suspecting what that was. They way you tackled the story and still planted it with intrigue was interesting and totally workable. Thank you for the delightful tale. I didn't find any errors. Write on!!
Isn't that the truth! So many things to be addicted to and one of the worst is another human being that you love and hate. But then again, if we feel these things, it proves we are alive, doesn't it?
You wrote this so precisely. I enjoyed it and it reminded me of when I was a lot younger.
Thank you for the read.
Was such an interesting tale. Caught me interested all the way through. Thank you for the great read. I enjoyed it.
Could see nothing to correct. In my mind it was perfect.
Wow! This sure depicts despair throughout the whole piece. You did a good job of rhythm and rhyme. And I loved the repetition at the end. It really shows her distress and fear.
Intelligent story plot. And surprise ending. But of course!! Love these shorts that tell a lot in little words!
Only correction I would suggest is so minor. Just in that last sentence a wrong word.
"Which proved yet again that were really wasn't any intelligent life on the planet Clyde."
"were" should be "there"
A delightful piece with a great message. I too have a little dog and two cats and know the time it takes to negotiate a peace agreement. But it does come in time.
Love that cat motto. Made me chuckle. So true.
Well written piece as well. Write on!!!
This is a wonderful piece and well worded. I believe it was written from the heart and not yet edited. Some editing to correct the punctuation and wording etc will greatly enhance the piece when you get a moment. However, it has a great message to all and captured my interest through out.
Loti
I just love poetry with a deeper meaning within its lines. You have spoken and described the chaos of the soul eloquently. Free verse is so -- well--- free! I love it.
Whoa!! This story has potential to turn into a larger story. I was totally intrigued and pulled along in the story. Then left wondering with lots of questions! I do hope you expand this one.
I feel it is written well, so offer no changes really. Perhaps a missing comma or two - minor things.
This was such a turn about. Great change of viewpoint and I loved it. Only thing is what happened to the lady with the floppy hat since the reporter said no one else was there?
Loti
This is a very enticing story and encourages more reading. I especially enjoyed the beginning paragraph. It pulled me right into the story. There isn't much I would change here. You did well. But you might want to go through and check for minor spelling errors such as in the first paragraph where it said: "...as the star shone..." where it should be "stars."
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but I will say that writing a Haiku is quite an endeavor and you did superbly well on this one. I love it. I have never written one although I have written poetry. Thank you for the read.