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327 Public Reviews Given
333 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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101
101
Review of This Old Sweater  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Nice!

You have beautifully captured the attachment one can feel for an inanimate object. Fact is, these possessions often carry a greater amount of memories for us than a face or name can.

Keep writing!
102
102
Review of Letters  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
WOW!

You have a very powerful story here. It grips you right at the beginning, and keeps you wrapped until the very end.

I love the way you turned the story at the mid point. For me, anyways, it was highly unexpected. That ability to keep your audience guessing is a mark of a real storyteller!

Keep Writing!
103
103
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is a nice poem.

You have written a nice poem encouraging people to pray, yet you really give little support to prayer other than the fact that it is a nice thing to do.

If I were you, I would think about mentioning something about how God answers our prayers, and about how those answers might not be the ones we directly want, but rather answers that put us in line to get to where we need to go.

Keep writing!
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104
Review of Lost and Found  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow!

This piece is filled with a lot of emotion, and it calls on us to pay close attention to the minor details in our world. You have put together an amazing image here, one that will stick with me for a while. I like the fact that you never do come straight out and give a clear identity to the source of the heart, but rather allow the reader to make their own conclusion of what the heart is. By doing this, you have made it so that the piece is individual to everyone that reads it, and that is a mark of great power.

Keep writing!
105
105
Review of Legacy  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Very Nice!

You tackle some really powerful aspects of philosophy here, and have done it well. Legacy is one aspect of life that I think we all think about at some time, and you have captured that questioning effectively in this piece.

I like the imagery of the carving in the tree, and the connection to artists and generas of times past.

Keep writing!
106
106
Review of Bury Me Now  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow!

You have created a powerful piece here! Your description of the feeling of despair is spot on, and you have a wonderful way with words. For free verse this is very melodic, and your choice of refrain stands out against your title in a way that gives you even more power!

Keep Writing!
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107
Review of Not quite human  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow!

You have done a great job here, tying the life of the character to the empty closet he is staring at. Your description of the emptiness he feels, through the image of the closet, is powerful, and it is a great example of transfer and metaphor!

The only question I would ask is – How did he come to be so empty?

Keep writing!
108
108
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
You have a nice short story here.

Your piece is very believable; due to the fact that I am sure many out there can remember incidents like this from their high school days.

If I could give you any advice, it would be to look at possibly building off of this piece. There are so many ways that you could expand off of this. What caused them to break up? What was their relationship before they were in this situation? How did she react to the gum in her hair? All of these are avenues into a possibly great work!

Keep writing!
109
109
Review of Black Curtain  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a very nice piece of work.

I love the imagery that you are working with here, and even though they are tried and true descriptions, you have used the power of the words themselves in a way to make them new again. The way you have put this together also gives it a bit of drama, which is nice.

If I were to make any suggestions, it would be that in the future, you might want to introduce an unexpected metaphor into a selection like this. It would give your work an added pop, and separate you from the crowd.

Keep writing!
110
110
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a wonderful poem, even if you do not truly know what it is about. I think that is the amazing thing about poetry. You do not have to truly understand what it is that you have created. Furthermore, by not having a strict goal or message, you have allowed your readers to take their own message away with them. Never be afraid of an unknown or hidden meaning, as they are often gifts.

Keep writing!

Marc
111
111
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Amazing!

You have done a wonderful job at describing the feelings of an active participant in a one sided relationship. Your beginning is a bit vague as to where you are going with this, but in the long run, it actually helps to build the emotion of frustration felt by the speaker.

The power in the fourth and eighth stanzas is strong, and these two, along with the sixth stanza, could make their own poem, but you have given them support with the other stanzas, and that has made this piece all the more powerful!

Keep writing!
112
112
Review of Who Will I Be?  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow!

This is a great piece of work! I like the rhythm, and you have done a great job at portraying the uncertainty of moving away from a point of safety! I know that I felt some of these feelings when I first moved away from home, and I am sure that many of us go through these feelings at some point in our lives!

Keep writing!
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113
Review of Sand and Water  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a great poem!

I like the way you used the image of an attacking army to portray the waves of the ocean coming up on shore. It is an unexpected metaphor, but one that very accurately describes what is going on here. I especially like the image of tiny battalions carrying “with them the plunder of tiny castles”. It brings the poem to life!

Keep writing!
114
114
Review of Oak Tree  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a very nice poem.

I like the fact that you chose an object not normally associated with love to use as metaphor for your love for your partner. It is untraditional, but the way you set it up, it works well.

If I could give any advice, I might ask you to think of any other ways that you could show the connection between love ant the oak tree, so as to strengthen the connection. But, all in all, this piece works well the way it is too.

Thank you for sharing with us!

Marc
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115
Review of Silent Arrow  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow!

You have a story and a poem here that are filled with very powerful imagery. This was a very enjoyable read, and it is a work that puts you in the action, as opposed to just telling you about it.

I love the line "The arrow's gone, leaving one desolate man, with memories that would haunt his soul forever." Setting it as it's own paragraph was a very smat move.

Thank you for sharing this with us!

Marc
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116
Review of He Stuck Around  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Very nice!

It took me a second read to realize that you switched point of view for the second and third stanza, but I think it works nicely here. Almost like we are hearing from two people who are deeply comited to each other, althogh the first person is the one who relies on the second to a greater extent.

If I could sugest anything to improve this poem, it would be that you go back and think about spliting the two lines "She makes sure / I don't cut myself" and "And she tries / to get me to sleep". This would enhance to flow of the poem, but that is just my oppinion. I would not alter the wording.

Keep Writing!
117
117
Review of Noble  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
This is a nice piece!

I especially like the way you describe Alice, it paints a true pictre of her, and she really comes out as a truly defined character. You also do a nice job of building a bit of mystery around the school, showing it as a place set apart, clinging to camouflage that hides what is inside, but makes it stand out as an oddity in the world.

I am glad to see the title is "prologue", and hope that more is coming soon!

Marc
118
118
Review of Hell  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Wow.

You do a really god job at describing the way the tar reacts to your body, the way it envelops you like quicksand and consumes your form. I also like the fact that you describe the effect the tar has on your skin, that it not only burns, but drains you as well.

If I had any sugestions, it would be that you should go back and give more detail to the tar and it's effect on your body.

You have a very nice piece here!
119
119
Review of Giving Up  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
WOW!

You have here a piece that is filled with very strong emotion.

I like the way you make us feel the pain of the person going through this emotion. You refer to going through this multiple times, and it gives a vivid sence of being burned repeatedly in a similar mannor. You do not just tell the emotion, you make us feel it. Very good!
120
120
Review of So Little Time  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I really like the imagery in this piece. You describe it in such a way as to make us feel the anxious emotion of the star/snowflake as it falls, the “uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her centre”. I also like the image at the end, of the mistletoe shedding a tear.

I realize that this is a piece of flash fiction, but it also lends itself to an opportunity to further describe the physical and emotional aspects of transformation. You may at some point wish to further expand on this theme.

Thank you for sharing this with us!
121
121
Review of A Weaker Vessel  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an amazing piece! You convey volumes of information here in a very short piece, and that makes it extreamly powerful. Thank you for sharing this with us!

You might like the poem I have titled "Vessel" in my port.
122
122
Review of On Angel's Wings  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
WOW!! As I read this, I could actually feel the tension of the skin against my spine tense. This is a wonderful piece, and I am so glad you have shared it with us. You put a lot of emotion in to your work, both your writing and your work as a nurse, and it shows in this piece.

Thank you.
123
123
Review of I'm Moving On  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is very well writen. I like the way you progress from one emotin to the next as you progress through your feelings.
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124
Rated: E | (4.5)
WOW!

Very poignant. Your piece is a nice reminder of the effects of man upon nature.
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125
Review of Demons  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Very nice!
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