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Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
The poem starts with:

Sing a song of Tajmahal
a fine nazm or a ghazal

***
Sahir Ludhianvi, the famous poet, has already fulfilled your wish--

https://urduwallahs.wordpress.com/2012/12/26/sahir...

***

As regards your poem, it's nice.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
Review of Mirror, Mirror  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Just great! This is a wonderful poem. The concept is unique. The description is vivid. There are no mistakes of spelling or grammar. You have dealt with the theme very well.
Keep writing.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
3
3
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)
This poem has been written in praise of the Lord. It is welcome.

Near a shore, there an unknown horizon,
Waves in an endless come and go;

***

Maybe written as:

Near a shore, there is an unknown horizon,
Waves in an endless fashion come and go;

OR

Waves endlessly come and go;


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

=====================




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
4
4
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This is a gripping story set in the scenario of Satan versus God where, as expected, the forces of God win. The beauty of the story lies in its being written in flawless English and engaging style, maintaining suspense till the very end.

You are a good writer. Keep it up.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
Review of Invincible  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a good poem in rhyme and, apparently, also in meter (lines fluctuate between 13 and 14 syllables), written in flawless English. Sadly, all these qualities are not usually found in today's poetry.

He offered no regrets at all for his misguided youth
And told me of his arrogance, his rudeness and uncouth

>>> rudeness and uncouth don't gel together. One is a noun, the other an adjective.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
6
6
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
This article written by a Muslim doctor, tries to say that there is no express prohibition against education of women in Islam. She says--"Please, don't blame Islam as an hindrance to higher studies anymore".

The world is concerned not with what is written in Islamic scriptures but with how Islam operates in actual practice. In the Indian state of Jammu and Kashmir, girls schools were burnt down by Islamic zealots, saying there is no need to educate girls. In Afghanistan also, there are reports that secret classes are held for girls because they can't be educated openly. These may be stray incidents but speak a lot about how Islam, particularly of the Sunni Wahabi variety, operates.

Muslim girls and women in India have to face no such prejudices in general. Primary education is free in government schools in India. However, many Muslims prefer to send their boys to Madrasas, which are basically devoted to teaching Quran. Girls in such homes are simply not given any education.

Nobody can help a society that does not want to give proper modern education to children. Improvement has to come from within the Muslim society. It cannot come as long as the following idea prevails, as in this article--"One point I must add that as a Muslim, I have to prioritize my religion above all. So Muslim community should reconstruct the education process preserving the rules of Islam.

If the Muslim societies prefer religion over education, it is their sweet will. However, such sweet will proves to be a bitter pill.
[Otherwise, the author would have no reason to write such an article, emphasising that Islam is not against education to girls, as long as "Islam is preserved". Therein lies the bane of Islamic societies. Muslim countries are Islamic kingdoms or republics. None of them is secular. Muslims in India are lucky to be living in a secular country. That is why we have had as many as four Muslim Presidents in India (Zakir Husain, Mohammad Hidayatullah, Fakhruddin Ali Ahmed and Avul Pakir Jainulabdeen Abdul Kalam).

Can a non-Muslim ever be the President of a Muslim country? No. Till then Muslims in those countries would remain deprived to a certain extent. That is bound to happen when some windows are kept closed.

--M C Gupta


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
7
7
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
It is a nice poem with a lyrical quality. It is written in honour / memory of Saith, a broken kitten who healed.

I had difficulty understanding the following:

Dearly beloved Saith, sweet Saith,
Tribe leader most special,
Each loved only you in good faith.
Your expressions facial
Molded to each, in care and play,
Only you announce Chicken Day.
Molded to each,
Molded to each.
Losing tribe felt like dying may.

>>> How does the Chicken Day fit in here?


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
Review of Dear Me  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
It was nice reading your goals for 2020. Now that the year is soon to end, I hope some of the goals were achieved.

I particularly liked the following goa--"Just remember to convince him to let you manage a lot of the business yourself".

I hope you succeeded:)


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Review of The harvest  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
I have been unable to understand the idea behind this poem, its message and its content, even after reading thrice.

***
Labor is screaming for what it ought to be forever.

>>> It is difficult to think of the message sought to be conveyed here.

[Sometimes the message of an item becomes more clear by having a look at its description. Even the description here does not help--"When labor is broken because of the none evaluation of its holy meaning by someones".

AN HUMBLE, SINCERE AND FRIENDLY SUGGESTION:

You write both prose and poetry. Your prose (stories, medical articles etc.) come out much better than poetry. The reason is simple. Poetry calls for much more refined linguistic skills than prose. English being not your first language, writing poetry, at this stage at least, is not the best option.

NOTE--This is my sincere view but I may be wrong. Hope you don't mind. We share a common background. We are both physicians. English is not our first language. We are Egyptian / Indian and are not steeped in Western culture. Otherwise, I would not have ventured to pen this suggestion.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
10
10
Review of The marasmus  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
Ref: deaf and dump crowd.
>>> You obviously meant dumb.

***

Just alone frozen relationships remain; in a full marasmus they have already forgotten the feeling of humanity.


>>> This is intriguing. You know as a physician that marasmus, in contrast to kwashiorkor, is a state of malnutrition characterised by energy deficiency. I have never seen the term marasmus to describe frozen relationships. This just does not seem to be proper.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
11
11
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an interesting story and you are a good writer. Hence I am giving you full 5 stars in spite of certain mistakes :

****


She was angry cause she knew.....

>>> You have used this phrase / sentence repeatedly, maybe 25 times. "Because" is the correct form.

***

He could even match her fathers wealth

>>> father's

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
12
12
Review of The circus  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is a nice story but its narration is marred by certain deficiencies in language that hamper proper understanding.


EXAMPLES:

Many tell me that there is a unique spectacle such year but not revealed to the public yet.

>>> Replace 'such' by 'this'

The circus and in full autumn becomes suddenly an iced castle. No one can understand this. However the circus team members watch each other and seems to be accustomed to this event.

>>> Meaning not clear.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
13
13
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)
This poem describes the natural beauty of the sea shore where a child is playing in sand. Sound of sea gulls pierces the air.

A poem with too much variation in line length reduces poetical quality.

EXAMPLE:

Waves in come and go;(short)

A huge amount of shapes and colors of shells, starfishes and many multicolored pebbles thrown; (too long).

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
14
14
Review of Storm-swept  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
This short poem of eight lines compares the storm in the heart with a storm in the sky. It appears too short. Maybe you might like to add two more stanza.

There are no mistakes of language.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
15
15
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a nice poem about the death of an old lady who died like any other person, in a non-descript way. What makes it remarkable is the simplicity of words and expression. You have done a good job chronicling the death of the old lady.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================
16
16
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a nice poem about the death of an old lady who died like any other person, in a non-descript way. What makes it remarkable is the simplicity of words and expression. You have done a good job chronicling the death of the old lady.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================
17
17
Review of SEMANTICS  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This poem has been rated 4.5 by seven persons, so it must be of high quality. There is no doubt it has class. The only problem is I am unable to savour what is in the glass.But that is a personal problem.

OK. To be clear, I was not able to fully understand what the poem is saying, but it is a nice poem, nevertheless!

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
18
18
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
It is a nice poem. However, I had a feeling that punctuation, as appropriate, would improve it.

***

Make your little piece of earth clean
Help others sight unseen

>>> The second line in the above is difficult to comprehend.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
19
19
Review of BREAD  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a wonderful story. Simply wonderful!

You are able to combine, effectively, so many things in a small story--the subjugation / killing of Jews; the life in a foster home; the scourge of hunger and the heavenly smell of bread, along with Polycystic Kidney!


Your writing style is superb. Some examples:


"I remember the fresh smell of bread as it baked in the oven in our little cottage.I used to inhale that aroma in deep breaths; to me that had to be the scent of heaven. My mother kneaded that bread until her tears were mixed in the dough. At the time, I imagined it was her tears that made the bread smell so."


"I was trying very hard to become the American they wanted me to be by dreaming, making up stories inside my head, imagining I owned many things and won the Miss America contest. After all, didn't Americans dream a lot? Wasn't I part of the American dream? Plus, dreaming was a lot easier than facing reality especially at that moment."

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
20
20
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a rare read for me. I don't keep pets. None of my kin keeps a pet. As a matter o fact, Keeping pets is not very common in India. After all, one has to afford to live a decent life oneself before making life decent for others--humans or pets.

It was nice knowing about the various rituals for a dog's birthday and the inner feelings of a dog about the same. You have described all these in a clear, interesting style. There are no language errors.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
21
21
Review of Old Age  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)

This poem titled Old Age refers to old age as--"The old casing houses the inner youth."

That is a wonderful way of putting it. I have not seen such a comparison so far.

Your rhyme scheme appears to be abab. That being so, 'purpose' and 'clothes' in the second stanza do not rhyme.

***

Disenchangtment disavow.
>>> You meant Disenchantment


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
22
22
Review of Dwarfs and giants  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
This is a nice story with a good moral. A relative weakness is in the language. However, it is difficult to be adept in a foreign tongue.
Here are a few suggestions you may like to consider. [These are not exhaustive.]

******************

The giants' island has belonged to our land notoriety first": Nano says.
>>> The dictionary meaning of notoriety is--"the state of being famous or well known for some bad quality or deed".

Suggestion: The giants' island has belonged to our nation's ownership first"

***

We can easily hear bees and fly sounds.
>>> We can easily hear the sounds of bees flying.

***

"As we need to get weapons human being expertise from your country": Nano says.
>>> "As we need to get weapons, bring human expertise from your country"

***

Nano, the leader sets on the giant leader chair
>>> sits on the giant leader's chair

***


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
23
23
Review of The Sandman  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

This is a wonderful story, altogether new, very well told, without any mistakes at all. As a matter of fact, it introduced me to a new word--"hexes".

An example of the author's brilliant writing style--


"As an author of the romance genre, Mara was well aware that love disappointed more often than it lasted a lifetime, but still, she was unprepared for the sudden awakening from her dreamy relationship with Kyle that was in her future."

Keep writing!

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
24
24
Review of First Snow  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a nice poem on a theme I have never come across so far--a poem about a person from distant lands, maybe an immigrant to USA, who had never seen snow earlier and saw it for the first time.

Novelty is always welcome. There are no spellings / grammatical errors.

--M C Gupta


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
25
25
Review of Hannah  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a small, enjoyable article about a palindrome. Many people would know the meaning of the word but few would be able to name five or even three. Here, the author gives as many as forty examples!
A job well done.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

========================


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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