*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Creative fun in
the palm of your hand.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mcgupta44/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4
Review Requests: ON
5,742 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... 3 -4- 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 ... Next
76
76
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is an impressive introduction to a book. It is nice to see an author describe his purpose in writing the book as--"I've considered my purpose as an author – to make people happy".

Your language style is good with no clear / apparent mistakes. Yet, it is quite modest of you to write--"it might happen that I let some mistakes of English sneak into the chapters. I beg to forgive me for that, as well as for poor language".

All the best for your developing book.

It is a reciprocal review.
--M C Gupta
================
77
77
Review of Rainy Trip  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)

Firstly, your bio-block says--" I am six years old". You meant sixty.

I note that you have disability and, for that, I will not mention about the flaws in your writing.

However, I note that you are writing a novel. That being so, it would be advisable to take some lessons / course in English grammar / writing.

It is a reciprocal review.
--M C Gupta
================
78
78
Review of I am awake  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is described as--"written by a Vampier". It is possible that this particular vampire preferred to call itself as a Vampier.


I am surprised that this poem is titled--"I AM AWAKE HIAKU". The 6 verses are not haikus.

However, you have written well.


It is a reciprocal review.
--M C Gupta
================
79
79
Review of Who's a Square?  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.5)
I know that to my children
I’ll always be a square.

>>> This is a wonderful thing to remember:)
Well, life is just like that. Happens to everybody. But everybody is not able to write such a beautiful poem about it.

[What to say of writing, few would even think of writing a poem on this theme!

--M C Gupta
80
80
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (5.0)
Oh, what a story! It made me feel very humble. I cannot write even one sentence of emotional prose while here you have a mine of wonderful imagination, observation, description and confabulation, along with emotions and morals--all combined into one.

You are a great writer. I wish you all success in life--because you deserve it.

--M C Gupta
81
81
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is an unusual write on an unusual theme. The writer pontificates on the unusual theme--"Who is harder to love?". She comes out with the answer that, in her case, she found it hard to love herself because she was worthless, till one day she realised that she was created by God, and in creating her, He must have had a purpose, and, therefore, she was not worthless but had a purpose in life.

Some people might say this is circuitous reasoning.

In any case, it is reasonably well written. And, some sort of reasoning is better than no reasoning at all!

--M C Gupta
82
82
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a nice little essay about a topic that usually doesn't catch the attention of other writers. You have done well to give illustrative examples.

In India, BJP (Bartiya Nanata Paerty)'s election campaign, which made Prime Minister Modi win the post, made good use of the 3-word catchy slogan--"Acche Din Ayenge" -Good days are here to come].


This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
83
83
Review of Strength  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.5)
She was lonely,
She was sad,


She would ponder,
She would muse,


Is it fear?
Is it foes?


Yet she moves,
But never speaks,
To the rhythm of it all,
To the life of the beat.

***

The above is simply wonderful. You have packed a lot of meaning and feeling in this short poem. Keep writing!

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
84
84
Review of Love  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)

A nice poem, with the following comments:



Dew drops on roses

A beautiful site

***

What you meant was--"A beautiful sight".

ALSO

Love is a mystery

I can discover

Love is a mystery

I’ll always recover

***

The first two lines are fine. The last two are not.

"I’ll always recover" from what?


A common usage is--"I’ll recover from illness / grief etc."

Hope the above is of help.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
85
85
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)
Dear Dr.,

This is a nice write, though a bit difficult to comprehend. It is labelled as an essay. However, it gives a feel of a poem where the opening line is way too long.

Ref: lightening the paths to passengers

>>> Lightening means to lighten; to make less heavy.
Probably you meant 'lighting the paths'

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
86
86
Review of Dreaming  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
Nice poem. You need to be consistent in your plan of capitalising the initial letter of a line. You seem to try capitalising the first letter of a sentence. That's fine. But there are deviations.

they dance a lovers dance,
>>> lovers' dance

Hope you don't mind the comments.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
87
87
Review of Angeline Jolie  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
This is written like a poem but is, in fact, hardly a poem.

Ref: Mrs. Jolie is a spoke person for poor people
AND
I guess looking cute doesn't necessarily
make you a spoke person

>>> The proper word is "spokesperson"

***
The United States cannot police the world
or rebuild nations.

We the people of America are screwed.

>>> I shall not comment on whether "the people of America are screwed", but I would certainly say that the USA thinks it is the supercop of the world and that it is its God given duty rebuild nations.

It is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta
88
88
Review of The hard journey  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a great dream story that has a practical message--"The full message means: "work hard in order to be strong and reach the treasure (the knowledge) and to be finally wealthy".

The story has ats centre an Egyptian pyramid and hierographics. It is woven out of good imagination in the background of the author's nationality.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta
89
89
Review of A Sparkly Day  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
It is a nice short story with lesson for all--Doing good deeds brings happiness.

You have a likeable style of writing / story telling. The following was remarkable--

"When his tummy growled he thought it was another dog angry at him. It woke him right up. Sparkle stretched and yawned. Something was wrong. The air smelled bad. Not like skunks, something worse."

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta
90
90
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Ref: I did know about Playboy magazine and the adds for condoms.

>>> I think you mean ads (advertisements).

***

This is a nice poem which appears to portray a real / factual incidence. It speaks / reveals a lot about the Western culture.

This is a reciprocal review.

--M C Gupta

====================
91
91
Review of Stars  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is a reciprocal review.

Ref:

Staring at a gorgeous night sky.
Tears in the inky black which speak of more magnificence.

***

i)--To me it seems odd to liken gorgeous stars to tears.
ii)--How do tears speak of more magnificence?

The last line is great--"Silent captivators".

--M C Gupta

====================
92
92
Review of The Savior  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a reciprocal review.

You have written a Balassi Stanza, the requirements for which are--

rhyme bbaccadda,
syllable counts 667667667.
--https://www.volecentral.co.uk/vf/balassi.htm

Your syllable counts are not in conformity.

It is a good poem.

--M C Gupta
93
93
Review of GO GLOBAL  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
I think this is my fifth reciprocal review of your work. What I wrte in the ealier reviews holds good here also.

SUGGESTIONS--

i)--Try to avoid writing acrostics.Keeping flow in an acrostic is a big challenge.
ii)--Flow lacks in your poetry. That is an essential attribute of a poem.
iii)--Try syllable counting.

--M C Gupta
94
94
Review of GO WORLD  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
This is my fourth reciprocal review of your work. Since a review must be honest, I have rated all the four at 2.5, which means average. Increased rating can be possible if the followig suggestions appeal to you:

i)--Avoid writing acrostics except when necessary.
ii)--Try to introduce flow in your poetry.
iii)--Pay attention to syllable counts. That can do wonders to a poem.

--M C Gupta
95
95
Review of GO NATION  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
This is my third review of your work for reason of reciprocation.

It so happens that this, again, is an acrostic. I have certainly written acrostics, but I did so only to take part in a contest. Otherwise, I avoid writing acrostics because they are a challenge from the point of view of maintaining rhythm / flow, which, in my opinion, is an essential characteristic of poetry in any language.

--M C Gupta





96
96
Review of ROB  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (2.5)
Hello. This is my second review of your work as my duty to repay the favour to me in reviewing my poetry.

Frankly, I could not discern flow in your poem. I believe that poetry, of whatever nature and style, must flow.Without poetic flow, poetry assumes the contours of prose.

SUGGESTION--
i)--It is easier to maintain flow when lines are shorter.
ii)--You have strived to keep 13 words in each line. That is not the usual style of poets. You would, for a change, find that 13 syllables per line (though this, too, is on the higher side) would bring some flow.

--M C Gupta
97
97
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a good piece, and a needed one. Standards of language and grammar are declining, aided by SMS-texting styles.

I liked the way you give examples, such as:

***

New Horizons Academy offers courses in writing techniques, and it hires only the best instructors.
In this sentence, we have two independent clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction. New Horizons Academy offers courses in writing techniques can stand alone as a separate sentence. It hires only the best instructors is also an independent clause because it, too, can stand alone as a separate sentence. These clauses are joined by a Coordinating Conjunction, so a comma is needed before and.

**

A job well undertaken and well done!

--M C Gupta
98
98
Review of Those Eyes....  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
There are two aspects of a poem--Poetic idea and poetic form. The former is evident here. The latter is not evident. Poetic form is expressed through rhyme and meter. They ad beauty and charm to a poem. They are also a bit difficult to achieve because much practice is needed.

When line length is highly variable in a poem, it is often indicative of lack of poetic structure.

--M C Gupta

==========================
99
99
Review of Imponderables  
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.5)
Ref:

An old man with a head set
What could he be listening to?

Another day of imponderables
For the intrepid mall walker.

***

Nice presentation of imponderables! At this rate, anything that a man or animal does would be imponderable. And, pray, why should others' acts be ponderable? Doesn't everybody have right to privacy of thought?

--M C Gupta

=======================
100
100
Review by Dr M C Gupta
Rated: E | (3.0)
This is a poem that does not look like a poem. The lines have no semblance of some sort of discernible pattern. The line length varies from 7 to 23 words. 23 words might mean around 50 syllables. It would be almost impossible to expect some rhythm in such a piece, and there is none. I think rhythm is the single most important characteristic of poetry.

The above, dear Doctor, is not meant to down-rate this piece or your writing. All writers are to be encouraged. However, it is necessary to give a helpful and honest critique. I have simply done that.

Happy writing!

--M C Gupta, MD

=====================
2,282 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 92 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mcgupta44/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4