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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/melifred
Review Requests: ON
15 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
Review of Smells Like Paint  
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a funny story! I really enjoyed it. I like the way you used dialogue to tell most of it. In a short piece, you really gave each character a personality.
Well done!
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Review of The Flower I was.  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I really like this poem! I like the way you personified the flower. I also like the structure of the poem and the rhyming. By not rhyming the last two phrases, you make those stick out.
Well done!
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Review of Cyber Bullying  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Thank you for writing about such an important topic. As a teacher in a high school, I see firsthand how difficult it can be for young people to navigate social media.

I like the way you alternated the oreder last two lines of each stanza. I also like the way the poem tells the story in a succinct but powerful way.

Nicely done!
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi there,
Decided to review one of your pieces and see what you've been writing about. I like how you write about so many different topics and in different genres! I thought this was an interesting piece. It's true that we think of selfies as a modern trend, but in reality , people have been taking pictures of themselves for many years! I wonder what the most common reasons for selfies are; no one else there to snap the photo? narcissism? fun? to join n the on the trend? Lots to think about on an everyday topic!
Keep writing!
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Review of Grammy's Lessons  
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a beautiful tribute to your grandmother. I like the way you tell the story of the woman who had such an important impact on you. Many people make the mistake of focusing on material goods in life, but you show in this piece that love and generosity are more important than things. Well done.
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Review of Mr. Gray  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Wow! I like the suspense and the way the ending leaves you wondering about the details of the event at Mr. Gray's house. I wonder if you could have developed the characters a little more so that the reader understands more about what drives each person to act in the way they do. Nice job and keep writing!
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Review of Home  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I like the repetitive use of the word 'home." I also like how you start and end with the same two lines. Both of these give the poem a good rhythm and help to remind the reader of the central theme in the poem.
Nice job!
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Review of Farewell  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I like the story line a lot. It is a great coming of age story that so many people can connect with.

One suggestion I have is to change the past tense verbs to present tense. That will help the reader feel like they are there with the characters.

Nice job! Keep writing!
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Rated: E | (4.5)
What a great piece! Often when I am doing yardwork, I curse at the dandelions. Then I realize that I should admire their persistence. They are strong willed survivors for sure and I love how you personified that in this piece.
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10
Rated: E | (4.0)
Well, I never knew so much about the Oreo cookie! I cannot imagine a fruit punch flavored oreo.

What I liked about this piece is that it shows that anything can be a topic! I often have students who claim they don't know what to write even when there is a prompt! I can now tell them about the expository piece I once read on the Oreo cookie!

Nicely done!
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11
Rated: E | (4.5)
What a wonderful timely poem!

I love the way you repeated the street are alive and then end with the streets were alive. Some day soon, the world beyond our front doors will open once again.

Nicely done!
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Review of The Neighbour  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Wow! I love the way this story unravels little by little as you give the reader clues to the danger ahead; Justin's awkwardness, unexpected movement, and sound in the house, the lighter, and finally the message on the mirror. The intensity peaks just at the right time as the boyfriend comes home. The dead dog at the end is the perfect ending to this psychological thriller. Nicely done!
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Review of The Story Box  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I love the dialogue in this piece because it really lets the reader understand and get to know each of the characters. I also like the way the piece is "sandwiched." It starts with setting the scene, then goes to the heart of the story which is done beautifully through dialogue and then ends with setting the scene again. Nicely done!


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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/melifred