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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mjfeatherston
Review Requests: ON
17 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by James F Martin
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I don't share your fear but I did love your story (I wrote a similar short story called Mushroom Soup some time ago - but I warn you, it might make you a bit squeamish). :)
All that being said - very well written and nicely paced. I'm still smiling after reading it - always a good sign.

Bravo

JFM
2
2
Review of changes  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (5.0)
wonderful

JFM
3
3
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (4.0)
Loved it. My kind of story - a serious subject wrapped in good humor and fantasy. Well written and cleverly presented.
The embedded warning is clear - let's hope more readers and writers tackle these subjects in such an accessible and entertaining manner.

JFM
4
4
Review by James F Martin
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Absolutely wonderful, though imbued with sadness and a feeling of being alone, perhaps forgotten, maybe even discarded.

Despite the solemn scene, the words are glorious, with a beautiful pace, instantly forming vivid pictures.

So nice to see such a high caliber of poetry.

Loved it.

JFM
5
5
Review by James F Martin
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey that was fun. Did not see that ending coming - I was ready for a soft, transition, "now I have a heart" ending, "now I can love again", or something like that.
I much prefer your ending.

Well played!!!

JFM

6
6
Review of In memory  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Very beautiful - as are all your poems. A common thread of pain I see.

JFM
7
7
Review of Bo Dockett  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a cool story. You've succeeded in the impossible, my friend - making a story about the IRS interesting. I had to read to the end.

Well written with believable dialogue.

I spotted a sentence - the I.R.S. doesn't quit until you're under the jail - and wasn't sure if this was intentional. Otherwise, it flowed nicely.

Well done.

JFM
8
8
Review of Trepanation  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (4.0)
Well this was refreshing and very well written. I like your style and flow. I was smiling as I read - not sure why - its not a humorous story but it is pleasing.

There were a couple of polishing opportunities I noted (for what it's worth).

'There should be a warning right like I bite when overcome and i should have a sign' This sentence needs some syntax and I had trouble understanding it.

'I was going to write a list for you in bullet points about the reasons you should like me and then I was realizing that you already liked me and that I was writing a list of reasons you should believe in this.' This sentence works better without the the "in this" at the end.

'I am one of those cartoons where someone stands with a sword and then in the distance a roiling cloud of anger and things and noise comes storming across an expanse of desert at them.' This sentence works better without the "at them" at the end.

Great work - very enjoyable.

JFM

9
9
Review of A Moment In Life  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (4.0)
I feel my dishwasher has robbed me of a joyous moment. Perhaps I'll rethink my use of technology. But not tonight, it's Taco night. :)
Good story - well done.

JFM
10
10
Review of The warm tree  
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (4.0)
Very comforting. Deep and consoling.

One question - you wrote corps, did you mean corpse?

Well done.
11
11
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (3.5)
Douglas would be proud - a romantic take on the answer - 42

JFM
12
12
Review by James F Martin
Rated: E | (5.0)
How wonderful. In such a short story, only a few lines, you had me reeled in, impossible to leave until I found out why this woman was saved and what would become of her.
Very well written and vivid in style. The pictures you created were clear and memorable.

Bravo!

JFM
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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mjfeatherston