My word Brae, iF I could say my words in my language and have you understand them, I most certainly would right now.
At first, I read because the words had caught my attention, but I continued on reading because the content and emotion I felt when reading had caught my interest.
I felt it when you said, "His love for me was in English."
When I read that last part, I eagerly looked down hoping to find a continuation of the story, but knowing even then, that no more words were needed.
I don't know what it was you were projecting, but I feel you. There is not much said here, but I have heard enough, I think.
It's comfortable isn't it, this life you lead? It's unfortunately also lonely. I feel you, Sean.
Keep writing, let your words tumble out, don't hold them back. Live through them until you learn to live in the outside world. Everyone can take a pen and paper and start writing; open up a blank page and start typing. It is the emotion behind your words that kept me reading.
I am not a poetry person, but the title drew me in, which I believe to be a point in your favor :). The poem is beautiful in it's abstractness. I read it and it gave meaning to me, one I am sure will not be the same for the next person. I loved that.
Quite enganging. Got me curious when someone had to die. I'm wondering though, why does the charecter have no gender ? If the charecter is telling the story , does that mean they didn't die ? Is he (May make him male?) now a ghost, telling others how he died? hahahhah! That would be awesome!
I love your wrting style . I felt a bit of what he must've felt. The terror of being forever traped in a grave until he dies . Awareof his situation. I can't think of a worse torture .
What if , it was what the government wanted all along though? It's the government , they've done worse! LOL Okay, so you've left me with a lot of theories now , thank you , that ought to keep my brain busy. I'm honestly not sure how I feel about how this left me hanging. But that shows you're good, if you can get your reader's emotions involved like that.
carefl though , not everyone wants to read a story with an uncertain ending . Most read because they'd like to know the ending because they are uncertain about their own . So they go and read about someone else's
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