This is an endearing, intriguing story. I like the name Uncle Lion by the way. Said uncle seems to be developing a longing for a domestic style of life. He now appreciates little people and enjoys spending time with his precocious nephew. Your descriptions are vivid and true to life. I did notice a few things, a few small editorial type things. "He began t notice a faint tingling." I believe the letter 'o' is missing from the tail end of that 't'. "His buddy Hawk had telephoned from there favorite watering hole." That should be their. "But the time they reached the peacock". Do you mean by the time? "Returning a child to there parents." Again, it's their parents. "She settled he plump frame." Oops, the letter 'r' is missing from 'he'. "Hawk thinks I'm going banana's." I believe that apostrophe is unnecessary with bananas. "The call the wild armchair." Do you intend 'of the wild armchair' ? "With her cutsy nose." Cutesy? "Oh, therej would be a dozen of 'um." Yep, that errant letter 'j' is superfluous. Thanks for sharing, I enjoyed this tender read. Happy account anniversary.
There is a constant beauty to the changing of the seasons and you represent it here. Each time of year has its unique pros and cons. I like that you included the idea of motion such as "falling floods", "wandering waves", and"whirling winter winds'. The alliteration adds to this motion. Thanks for sharing and happy account anniversary.
For memory to be so inaccessible, fleeting and random must be exasperating. All of us rely upon our memories. We cherish them. We learn from them. We are comforted and yes, sometimes haunted by them. Most of us collect them and expect to summon them whenever we wish. Perhaps when a mind falters it remembers bits of song lyrics, but not necessarily their contexts or origins. Dementia is not for the faint of heart. By the way, happy account anniversary.
I am happy that you feel like a dog and are loved Lucy. It must have been torture to be crammed into a cage hearing and smelling all the other trapped canines. It sounds like you appreciate being able to run in the grass and enjoy sunbathing. Now you know what it is to be valued .You have someone to cuddle with and that is as it should be. Happy account anniversary Nikola.
I appreciate the rhyme and the rhythm of this piece of poetry. It flows effortlessly like the changing of the seasons. The first line of each stanza is clever and creative. It evokes the scene. Trees are partying or dancing. This enforces their vibrancy and lends itself to personalizing them. They can feel and spark feelings. Thanks for sharing. Happy account anniversary.
Is this meant to expose greed? That is one twisted stipulation. What is that ol' saying? Have your cake and eat it, too? This is a new twist on the bereaved idea of 'he's here with us.' Yes, Daddy was present not in spirit, but in body. The human stomach is sometimes forced to endure a lot. Imagine being the baker of this gruesome confection. This was an unexpected story. Happy account anniversary.
This is a poignant piece of writing. Despite the hardships and horror of war this writer clings to his beautiful memories as a means to center himself. Is this what many combatants did in their efforts to survive? With thoughts of loved ones they were never alone.
Well, isn't this a dreary piece of depressing poetry. That is the idea though, eh? I suppose feeling blue and helpless would be similar to this poem's sentiments. There is that perpetual state of why bother it is the same old same old. Even the presentation in lower case letters lends its self to that weariness. It is the age old quandary. Work to earn money, but is that reward enough. Happy account anniversary.
Bessie seems like a different type of servant. She has backbone and is capable of independent thought. It would be interesting to read of her exploits/troubles to find herself amidst her squalid circumstances. Mistress Mayhew could also become quite the odious villain. The story ideas are endless. Happy account anniversary.
Well, this had a surprise twist as an ending. The entire story describes an odd fellow, or is he odd? Samuel could be viewed as eccentric and deeply committed to his beliefs. Is wishing to live a separate, austere life the result of madness, or profound sanity? I do not know. "Asit swung it out over
Forgive me, but I chuckled reading this description of your battle with a squirrel. Yes, it seemed to be a duel of wills with neither side conceding defeat. The fact that you, in the end, pondered a rock garden is hilarious. I can relate somewhat. For two summers a flying squirrel commandeered the shed at our seasonal RV site. They are determined creatures. As I was reading I noticed a few issues. "I turned and looked there through the window." I suggest you move 'there' and add it to the part of that sentence where you write "sitting in my front yard". Sitting there in my front yard. "Holding it's gut." It should be its. "Curling his fluffy gray tale" should be tail. "Also question is had was." Do you mean also another question I had was? "Had also decided to the party." Do you mean had also decided to join the party? Thanks for the laughs and happy account anniversary.
I really like the premise of this story. You never know what you may over hear at a restaurant, so why not two women discussing how to get rid of a body. People need to talk. People seek the opinions of their friends. I can picture Judy and Tilly passing the napkin notes back and forth to each other as they puzzle over what they are hearing. There are a few issues that I've noticed. First, there's a strange a between the words after and surviving in the first sentence. Also, your use of " is irregular. It should be placed around dialogue, yes, but not include the verbs such as she said. Also, The Officer said to Mrs. Martin, "Just tell me" or The Officer said, "Mrs. Martin just tell me." Indeed is one word. Sorry, I do not wish to nitpick. This is the start to a great murder mystery. I enjoyed reading your story.
I like the rhythm and the rhymes in this powerful piece of poetry. You describe an emotional scene during battle. Far too many soldiers lose their lives and their injuries are horrendous. Many were little more than children wanting to be men. "Did our boys grow up together just to shoot each other dead?" This is the universal query re war. Happy account anniversary.
This is a poignant story. All the emotions are present and they balance each other. Yes, powerful sadness permeates this tale, but it is tinged with incredible love and acceptance. Noni experienced a short life, but she truly lived each moment. She knew she was cherished. She knew she had physical limitations. She asked her questions and attempted to satisfy her curiosity. She still sought education and friendship. The circumstances of her parentage are a surprise. This is a well-crafted story. The narrator has a strong voice. She has made peace with her choices. I did not notice any writing issues. The style is riveting and easy to follow. Happy account anniversary.
Memories of childhood and time spent blissfully in the summer are magic. I like that you employ the senses in this poem. It did feel wonderful to be free of technology. Outdoors did beckon and adventure waited. "Staying until were were toasted." Do you mean we were toasted? I am not sure about the word trodded. Happy account anniversary.
First let me convey my condolences. I am priveleged to love and be loved by four granddaughters. I cannot fathom the pain you describe in your poem. I suppose I would carry that love with me as you do and there would be so many what ifs. There is beauty and longing here. Selena will not be forgotten. Happy account anniversary.
I tend to agree with you. Being a writer, I too believe a pen and paper become wonderful tools/vessels. Without them how can we express ourselves? I like that you consider the act or art of writing as a chance to share your emotions with them. They also become therapists of sorts helping the writer to work through their feelings. The paper and pen never complain as you suggest. Happy account anniversary.
This poem is well-crafted with an easy, unforced rhythm and matching rhymes. I like that it begins and ends with the same two lines. It comes full circle like the passing of a year. How clever to present procrastination as a slithering snake. "January's promises so easily left to wither." This rings true. Happy account anniversary.
Thanks for sharing all of this. I have a smile on my face now. Sure, I could point out a few little tweaks needed, but why do that? There are " missing here and there, but their absence did not in any way interfere with your natural story-telling. I understood you were recalling amusing conversations. All of that give and take, back and forth between family members is often unintentionally funny. Happy account anniversary.
WOW! You certainly have been put through the proverbial wringer. Yes, you were scammed and victimized, there's no doubt of that. That this even happens is outrageous. Scammers are the worst kind of fraudsters and thieves. They steal far more than money. Thank you for sharing your experience and warning the rest of us. Happy account anniversary.
Well, what can I write as a response to this? You do not beat about the bush here. You write sparingly about your life-changing experience. You share the stark reality of being extremely ill, receiving a shocking diagnosis, and then dealing with the 'unpleasantries' of hospitalization. I imagine hearing that you have the big C is not on your bucket list. Writing about it may be cathartic? I wish you have all the time you need to love your family and continue writing. Happy account anniversary.
Haha, I rather enjoyed this novel version of The Three Little Pigs. I would never have pictured the big bad wolf as a wannabe, inept salesman. He does seem to have a temper though and attacks those who do not buy his wares. And he is smitten by a gracious, accepting pig. This is a fun, frolicking retelling of a classic. The details are delightful and there is underling humour here. The ending is also unexpected. The little matter of the missing brothers could extinguish the burgeoning flame of love. Happy account anniversary.
This is a moving, eloquent, and bittersweet piece of writing. It shares an aging woman's reflections. Within a few words her life of railing against the evil, the bad, the depressing is revealed. She never gives up and continues to search for the good. She attempts new hobbies and skills. She focuses on a beautiful tree and recognizes its resilience. One day at a time this woman perseveres. I noticed one tiny 'thing'. "Some have few if any to hear their tale's of woe." That apostrophe with tale is unnecessary and should be tales. Happy account anniversary.
Thanks for this description of night shifts as a security guard/ maintenance worker. I imagine the nights can seem endless. Sometimes, it must be wonderful to encounter something out of the ordinary to relieve the monotony. This reads as contemplative. There are not many places where silence reigns. The ending just ends abruptly. Happy account anniversary.
This short story is well-crafted and it flows effortlessly like the lake water mentioned. It begins in the present with a grieving mother and segues to her last vibrant memories of her son. Once her memory replays she returns to the harsh present. This makes sense. This collection of words resonates with sorrow and loss. It is not frilly, or over effusive.Thanks for sharing and happy account anniversary.
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