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Review Requests: OFF
163 Public Reviews Given
164 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I look for grammar and spelling mistakes and generally focus on how the piece reads like the flow and word choice. If you are just seeking a review of the overall story, just ask. I am still a little new to review but I try to be as thorough as possible and point out any and all mistakes that I can find. I will usually review anything that you request of me if I have time. Though there are a few genres and types of writing I don't really prefer.
I'm good at...
Finding typos, grammar and spelling mistakes and telling you how the writing made me feel.
Favorite Genres
Action/adventure, sci-fi, mystery, fiction
Least Favorite Genres
Erotica, romance, horror, LGBT
Favorite Item Types
Short stories, flash fiction, and poetry
Least Favorite Item Types
Novels and short stories more than 5000 words.
I will not review...
Erotica or Romance. Not my cup of tea. Sorry.
Public Reviews
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51
51
Rated: E | (3.5)
First, I think it is really sweet that you write poetry for your daughter.

I think that both times you use the word "lay", it should be "lies", I only point this out because someone actually just pointed it out to me in one of my poems.

Overall, the piece is short, there isn't any rhyming and it is a little difficult to read but the simplicity of it and the reason you wrote it are what make it a good poem.

It could use some cleaning and polishing but overall good. I hope one day that I can write poetry for my future children.

Thanks for sharing!

Keep writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
52
52
Review of Of Good or Evil  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Arthur finally came to inside a dark dungeon, a hole in the middle of nowhere that he had been [p]ut in to be forgotten.

...i blacked out again... at this point in the story, you randomly stay using I. you changed to first person for some reason when he blacked out. I don't understand because it seems like two people, one body or something.

I assume they ended up in hell. But this was rather confusing. I also dob't understand how the title relates to the story.

It has potential. Maybe I am just easily confused. With some more explanation, it would be easier to read and understand.

Keep writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
53
53
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Haha... this is great! Interesting nerdy twist on the fear or religion/radicals. I love the math humor involved. I was hooked once I reached the part about what happened the past few weeks and I just kept reading.

I think some people won't ubderstand because of the math humor but I think it is really great and creative!

Here is one mistake I saw:
numbers were divisible could [be] changed for the better

Great work! Keep Wroting!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
54
54
Review of Long Overdue  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hahaha... that is funny. I did find it to be a little predictable but it was still a pleasant read Interesting names as well.

I didn't see any grammartical or spelling mistakes but they could be there and I just missed them.

It was a good story thougg. Keep Writing.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
55
55
Review of Black Monday Moon  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
I read this because it was suggested by someone who reviewed my recent poem about insamnia.

This is a little difficult to read because there is no punctuation. I tried pausing at the ends of lines but it does really work.

I think it is a good concept but I don't understand the title. I don't think it is really explained, only stated.

Overall, it is a pretty good start. It just needs a litle work.

If you are interest, hope over to my portfolio and read "My Curse". It is also about insomnia. Only of you are interested.

Please know that I am new to writibg poetry and I still have a lot to learn but these are simply my opinions in hopes of helping

As always, keep writing! :)


Natalia


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
56
56
Review of Snowflake  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
"He sighed heavily, fighting back the tears welling into my eyes." You say "he" and "my" in this sentence. It can't be both.

"He closed my eyes, tears flowing uncontrollably. “I’m sorry,” he sputtered. " Again here with he and my.

This is a terribly sad story. A well written story beside the two mistakes above. I read every word hoping for the best. I am not one to cry over stories but this one brought me pretty close to tears. I can feel my heart hurting for Jack and Sarah.

Good job at grabbing the attention of the readers with the huge age gap and the internal conflict that Jack feels about their relationship.

It is quite good, though very sad. I am also not a romantic but I enjoyed it.

Keep writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
57
57
Review of Reap of Sowing  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Well, that was a freaky story. Then I think that is what you were going for. Good descriptions, they freaked me out for sure. I am not much of a horror story kind of person but that was interesting to read. Even though it freaked me out, I wanted to keep reading. Good job.

I didn't see any spelling mistakes but I think this sentence needs to be changed:

"She performed in witchcraft" I don't think you need the "in" here. Just simply "she performed..."

Other than that... good job.

Keep writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
58
58
Review of The Prank  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Haha... such a great ending! I love the description of the mom in the beginning and by the end, she is there laughing with her son at her other son.

I didn't see any grammar or spelling mistakes that jumped out at me but it was a good read.

But I did catch a character name mix up. "“Where’s your brother Mark?” She asked, in her no nonsense voice." this should be Josh, not Mark.

Good luck in the competition.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
59
59
Review of Forever in Time  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Tim,
I think that I have reviewed some of your work recently. The flow of this poem is so smoothe. The focus of timeless love in God is a great theme.
It is well formated and puncuated.
I find it very difficult to find errors in your work. You edit them very well before posting and I always enjoy reading.
Thanks and keep writing! I look forward to reading more!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
60
60
Review of Soaring Journey  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Bugaloo,

Wow, the imagery in this piece is breath takingly amazing. As I read, I could see the clouds and the beauty of it all. The discriptions are wonderful. I felt like I was flying and the words I read were simply my thoughts put on the page.
My only suggestion would be to break it up into lines or smaller paragraphs because it will be easier to read on here.
Other than that, great work! You did a great job! I believe you could be a great fantasy writer.
Keep Writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
61
61
Rated: E | (4.5)
Dear Tim,

Haha... thank you for sharing this. It is suck a good laugh. The rhyming is great and the story within the poem is great. I like you sense of humor, clean and entertaining.
I do not see any obvious mistakes in grammar, that doesn't mean they are there but this is solid work.

Keep writing, my friend!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
62
62
Rated: E | (4.5)
Wow! That is really cool! I got a little lost in some of the words chosen mainly because they are words from another generation but it is a very interesting story.
I didn't see any visible or major errors.
It kept me interested throughout the whole time I was reading.
Nice work! Keep Writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
63
63
Review of The Horn  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Wow! Such a creative twist! I didn't expect the cat to be a fairy at all. This is a really cute and simple story with a great twist at the end.
It is well written and it seems to be edited pretty well because I found it difficult to find any major mistakes.

This story made me feel really happy to read it. It caught my attention from the beginning and though it was a short story, it kept my attention the whole time and I was shocked when I read the last paragraph.

Great job! This was a pleasure to read!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
64
64
Rated: E | (4.0)
leighphey,

The article as a whole was interesting. Though I had to force myself to keep reading because the beginning of the article didn't catch my attention.

The title grabbed my attention quickly but the first few lines weren't as interesting as the rest of the article.

There are a few grammatical mistakes or words that could be replaced with other words. For example, "you'll see in books and history channels" are you talking about the history channel?

Also, the sentence that begins "its root started" usually you would use the plural "roots" because anything with roots has more than a single root, generally speaking at least.

Overall, it is a solid article. Keep writing but I would suggest reading through at least once before posting.

I speak from personal experience, I am terrible at proofreading my own work!!!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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