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773 Public Reviews Given
774 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I like to say how I relate to an item. Spelling and grammar are less important.
I'm good at...
Giving encouragement
Favorite Genres
Thiller, Detective.
Least Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Sci-fi
Favorite Item Types
Short stories.
Least Favorite Item Types
Free verse.
I will not review...
Items over 4k words.
Public Reviews
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176
176
for entry "My Weirdness" 
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing "My Weirdness" for
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I Write in 2020  (E)
Write and review once a week for all of 2020
#2208028 by Aennaytte: Free & Wild in GoT


Initial Impression

Not as weird as some. A spreadsheet takes up far less space than keeping the actual books. Guilty! I recently had a good clear out and got rid of about twenty boxes full of books I've read.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Okay, the dungeons and dragons and similar might make you a bit of a geek but reading is not that strange.

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177
177
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am reviewing
 Crisis management   (E)
Write an essay on managing a crisis
#2221150 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

This piece is well timed. There is no bigger crisis than the one we are all facing at the moment. There are good points here about seeking the appropriate help, not placing blame and most importantly giving emotional support to those affected.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

With regard to the current crisis it depends how you are affected. For those with the virus, medical help is obvious. For the rest of us it is unclear from whom we can seek help. There is nobody to blame. And the best we can offer each other is emotional support.

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178
178
Review of Discarded  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Discarded  (13+)
Naani Poem: Winner in Writer's Cramp 4/27/20
#2220261 by ♥Hooves♥
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

I won't pretend to know anything about poetic forms but it says 24 syllables and that fits. This has coronavirus tones. Masks are the new fashion accessory.

Spelling and Grammar

No spelling mistakes, not sure about the grammar - no expert with poetry.

Overall Impression

We all have the freedom to risk our own lives but not the lives of others. Stay home, save lives.

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179
179
Review of Homecoming  
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 Homecoming  (18+)
Assignment #4 - Building Sexual Tension... the anticipation after a week apart.
#2220052 by 💙 Carly
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

Things have certainly moved on since I read my last piece of this story. No longer innocent, yet not overtly sexual.

Plot and Characterisation

Arlynn returns after a week away. You portray the thoughts and feelings of the couple very well, using scent as well as sight and touch to show their feelings.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

You interweave the POV of both parties, interlaced with flashbacks to previous encounters. You have achieved a truly romantic story.

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180
180
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 Morning Encounter   (18+)
This is my make out scene... but it is pretty tame.
#2218751 by 💙 Carly
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

You are off to a good start. A romantic breakfast without getting too graphic.

Plot and Characterisation

This is just a section of a much longer story but already we know the characters have feelings for each other. Bringing in meeting the family suggests it is more than lust driving the relationship.

Spelling and Grammar

There are a few typos that need to be addressed but no real problems.

Overall Impression

'Fifty Shades' might have been a best seller but it was hardly a literary masterpiece. Keep to the innocence and romance.

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181
181
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I found it interesting to read the story from Emma's POV. It started well. The problem you have, one I have suffered from myself, is that you get so far then you want to end it. The last two thirds of this were rushed. I see a number of chapters here, probably one from each paragraph.

What happened at the police station when Grey voluntarily went there? Did they believe him? How and why was he beaten up by his brothers. These are scenes which should be told from Grey's POV.

Learn to slow down. Write a few paragraphs, reread, take time to think out the next scene. You have the outline here now fill in the blanks.


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182
182
Review of The Mission  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
The Mission  (E)
Three soldiers on an important mission
#2217210 by BlueJay
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

Which war are we fighting? Are we in Afghanistan? No. We are kids on a holiday adventure.

Plot and Characterisation

In a few words we were taken to a warzone with Jimmy as the officer commanding his men.

Spelling and Grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

This reminds me of a bygone age when battles weren't fought on a screen.

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183
183
Review of Greyson Dante  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Greyson Dante   (18+)
Written for the Character Contest. This may become part of a mystery romance
#2216650 by 💙 Carly
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

An interesting coming home story. Memories of a not so happy past mixed with the effort to move on.

Plot and Characterisation

The narrator returns to his boyhood home after his father's death. We learn of his unhappy childhood, and see the man he has become.

Spelling and Grammar

There is a brief passage near to the beginning where the tense changes from first person to third. There are also a few typos.

Overall Impression

I want to know what happens next; the sign of a good story.

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184
184
Review of Soda Bread  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Soda Bread  (E)
This Irish treat can mean big trouble for a Leprechaun.
#2216110 by flyfishercacher
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

I can smell the bread, yum. Not surprised the leprechaun was tempted, bread being in short supply and all.

Plot and Characterisation

I think Meadowbush has visited our local supermarkets. Or maybe it was his mates. Those leprechauns get everywhere. You know the wee folk well.

Spelling and Grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

The bread thief is very applicable at the moment. Ours tend to be larger and drive SUVs.

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185
185
Review of Nervous Flier  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Nervous Flier  (13+)
A 24 Syllables contest entry
#2214409 by Mastiff
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

24 syllables is not much space to create but there is a story here. Not sure if the nervous flier is the passenger or the pilot. I hope it's the former but fear it's the latter as you mention 'skill will keep the job'.

Spelling and Grammar

I'm no expert when it comes to poetry form but I see no spelling mistakes.

Overall Impression

I take it the word 'Charisma' was a prompt. Charisma is indeed something which can gain you employment in some spheres.

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186
186
Review of Wonderland 2020  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing "A-2: Find the Key to the Garden" for
FORUM
I Write in 2020  (E)
Write and review once a week for all of 2020
#2208028 by Aennaytte: Free & Wild in GoT


Initial Impression

Well done. I know you don't like praise but the very fact that you are looking at the children as possible adoptees shows your commitment. If this blog entry makes even one person think it will be worth it.

Spelling and Grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

A real heartfelt article/personal journey. It means a lot to you and that comes through. It is a little different in the UK. They are trying their best to phase out group homes and make sure every child has a foster home. One of the problems we are facing in the last few years is an influx of unaccompanied minors who are seeking asylum.

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187
187
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Lyrics of The Lancers  (18+)
A Distorted Minds Contest entry
#2213947 by Mastiff
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

As a detective writer myself I was about to say this case was just too simple, then came the twist.

Plot and Characterisation

I'm not sure what your word limit was but maybe your detectives could have been developed a little further. I did get the character of the husband fairly well. The plot started simply but that ending came as a big surprise.

Spelling and Grammar

I spotted the odd typo, common mistakes when the muse takes you and you type at speed. Otherwise, no problems.

Overall Impression

When the contest is over consider lengthening this piece. Give us more of the detectives, their appearance, their quirks. Let us see Jimmy at work. More importantly, let us learn a little more of the true killer, the guy behind the music.

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188
188
Review of The dancer  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 The dancer  (E)
Disillusioned after a dancing career
#2211684 by Sumojo
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

The story of Eloise unfortunately cut short by the word limit. You certainly evoke the little girl with aspirations and her final fate.

Plot and characterisation

Memories of a faded career. You show the older woman she has become. I could feel her disillusionment, picture her career at the Folie Bergeres and her downfall that led to stripping in a seedy nightclub.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

I wanted more. This could easily be the synopsis for a novel. I could see the young woman setting off for Paris with high hopes. I could feel the heartache as her career downslides into the seedy underworld.

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189
189
Review of The Avalanche  
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am reviewing
 The Avalanche   (E)
Erin has a lucky escape
#2211190 by Sumojo


Initial Impressions

Not sure if this is a true story but the old adage 'Show don't Tell' comes into force here. I can't tell you how to rewrite but think about using dialogue; maybe someone can tell you about snow conditions, give the safety lecture etc.

Plot and characterisation

The plot is simple - caught in an avalanche. You don't really create characters; dialogue might help to do this, as would description.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Could be an exciting adventure story if you show don't tell.

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190
190
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Chili By Candlelight  (13+)
A young married couple have an explosive evening, in more ways than one.
#390493 by Sophy
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

My initial impression was of an elderly couple. Maybe it was the knickknacks, all with their place. Maybe it was the nagging wife. Now I see that was because of the necessary quotes.

Plot and characterisation

It is an age old situation - the unexpected pregnancy. I still did not get the sense of a young couple, married only briefly. They came across as an old married couple with years of living together and knowing each other's ways.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

The exploding chilli as metaphor for the argument, deliberate or coincidental?

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191
191
Review of Dreamcatcher  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Dreamcatcher  (18+)
What happens when a dreamcatcher is full? 120 word flash
#1270576 by Arakun the Twisted Raccoon
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

120 words doesn't give you a lot of scope but you managed to have a beginning, a middle and an end.

Plot and characterisation

Quite a simple premise that a dreamcatcher can only hold so much. Harvey must have real problems for so many nightmares.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

It tells a story despite the word limitation.

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192
192
Review of Got It?  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Got It?  (18+)
Mick's really bad plan, plus pigeons and more. (Dog-Ear Tales)
#1426752 by Ben Langhinrichs
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

This reminds me of Dumb and Dumber and others of that ilk. I'm not sure Mick is the only one with a low IQ. Your narrator went with the plan and then made things worse.

Plot and characterisation

I really get those characters coming through. Alcohol and drugs have really killed a few brain cells in this pair. I liked the listing sections, like the guy was trying to get things straight in his head.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

This is well written with the distinct voice of the narrator and his pal. I've known people like this.(Mentioning no names)

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193
193
Review of This is the UFO.  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 This is the UFO.  (E)
We are glad to announce recruitment on Planet earth, please read this info item.
#2209594 by NOBODYLEARNS
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Welcome to WDC.

Initial Impressions

Where do I sign up? This is an interesting way of writing fiction. Who knows, one day it might be real.

Plot and characterisation

The plot is that an alien organisation are recruiting. This is almost believable. As to characterisation, not really applicable, although I think I can picture some strange alien sat behind a desk, interviewing recruits. Maybe that's the way to go to add to this piece.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems with either. Maybe the layout is not quite right. Look at an army recruiting poster for ideas.

Overall Impression

Maybe not a story as it stands but a useful inclusion for something longer. Keep going.

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194
194
Review of Dream Logic  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Dream Logic  (E)
A recurring nightmare I used to have which was often spurred on by the silliest of things.
#2210048 by Michael Rose🏳️‍🌈
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

Dreams are weird and this dream is no different. Not so scary to begin with, then the man with the knife is terrifying. As a recurring dream, knowing the ending, means the fear builds straight away.

Plot and characterisation

You know right away that this is a dream. The man passing by the window could be quite innocent, yet you know he isn't. You've had the dream before.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems with either.

Overall Impression

Unless this was prompt led, maybe don't mention this is a nightmare; let people be surprised by the ending.

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195
195
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 The astral collection  (E)
flash fiction about a little girl that astral travels and brings back something
#2178291 by AnaStar
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

A short piece but very charming. I would love to see the child's collection. This could turn into a much longer work if there was one special piece in the collection that just had to be returned.

Plot and characterisation

The plot is straight forward; the child astral projects/flies and comes back with momentos. Worried parents try to keep her safe in her bed. Character development is not really possible in flash fiction.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems in this area

Overall Impression

I see this as the start of something, if you want to take it there.

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196
196
Review of A Small Death  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
STATIC
A Small Death  (E)
She lies in sleep ... (Form: English Sonnet)
#1986852 by 🌕 HuntersMoon
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Initial Impressions

Yes, I understood it. So much poetry just goes over my head. I think you are talking about sleeping and dreaming. This is someone tempted to remain in that dream state.

Spelling and grammar

Thank you for including details of the form used. So many poets fail to do so. I am a product of an English 1960s education; we weren't taught these things. I see no spelling problems and the shortened words (eg. mem'ry) are appropriately written.

Overall Impression

Your experience shows. Your work is a good example to the newer poets on WDC.

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197
197
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am reviewing
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#220986 by Not Available.
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 

Welcome to WDC.

Initial Impressions

I hear an accent running through your story of the first day in 7th grade. I take it English is not your first language.

Plot and characterisation

The plot is simple. New class, running late, teenage embarrassment. You relay those feelings of uncertainty well. Liza is the typical teenager, just discovering the opposite sex but not sure what to do about it.

Spelling and grammar

There are a few typos. The grammar may not be 'right' but it displays Liza's accent well. Intentional or not it works. Maybe more paragraphs, especially for being read on line, would make this story easier to read.

Overall Impression

A charming story from a young writer. Keep going, hone your skills, try some contests to stretch yourself. Don't be afraid to ask for help from us oldies.

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198
198
Review of Entry 3  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Entry 3  (ASR)
Entry 3 of Rayla's diary
#2210315 by Championrqr
as part of "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party" 


Welcome to WDC.

Initial Impressions

This fantasy tale is written in diary form which means 1st person POV. This negates the need for dialogue and thus inventing a language for the creature.

Plot and characterisation

This is a diary entry rather than a complete story so plot is basically a fight scene. You have described the creature well and your main character is developing by his actions/reactions. Further diary entries might show different sides of the main character.

Spelling and grammar

No real problems although I did spot the odd typo. You might consider using shorter paragraphs to make it easier to read from a screen.

Overall Impression

As a newbie you are definitely showing promise as a fantasy writer. Look for contests. They are a good way of getting yourself known on here.

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199
199
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
If you have been having this nightmare for 25 years I suggest you seek help. However, presuming this is fiction, you certainly captured that paralysing fear. I liked the imagery of the trees looming over the road, the ominous feeling, the knowledge that you were approaching a place; a place and event you had been to over and over.

You say in your bio that you have problems with grammar; I certainly see no evidence in this piece.

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200
200
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I found this flash story very funny. Indeed, most horror movies are cliched. You did a very good job of conveying a complete story in so few words. Okay, so few words cannot build characters, but you tell us they are a blonde cheerleader and a handsome football player and that they are vain and that they have reflections all in one sentence.

I see no problems with spelling or grammar.

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