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Review Requests: ON
772 Public Reviews Given
773 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I like to say how I relate to an item. Spelling and grammar are less important.
I'm good at...
Giving encouragement
Favorite Genres
Thiller, Detective.
Least Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Sci-fi
Favorite Item Types
Short stories.
Least Favorite Item Types
Free verse.
I will not review...
Items over 4k words.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 5 6 7 8 -9- 10 11 12 13 14 ... Next
201
201
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I found this flash story very funny. Indeed, most horror movies are cliched. You did a very good job of conveying a complete story in so few words. Okay, so few words cannot build characters, but you tell us they are a blonde cheerleader and a handsome football player and that they are vain and that they have reflections all in one sentence.

I see no problems with spelling or grammar.

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202
202
Review of Peacock Smiles  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
This short piece tells a heartwarming story. The first sentence needs a rewrite; 'tenth feather of peacock' should maybe say 'tenth peacock's feather', and 'looked at happily' should say 'looked at it happily'.

In the second paragraph "Happy Birthday mom" should continue on from 'in front of her'; it's the same person speaking.

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203
203
Review of Midnight Manor  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
I can't quite put my finger on what's wrong with this story. The idea is good but the execution is lacking something. Re-read it yourself, see if you can find your way out of the confusion.

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204
204
Review of The Visitor  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Nightmare/reality, who knows? Alive or dead? This certainly questions the reader. We've all tied one on but thankfully I've never had this kind of experience.

It ran in my head like a movie which is the sign of a good story.

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205
205
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Welcome to WDC. In the first paragraph you describe the female twice. Maybe a bit too much description of the house;are you in the building trade? Ah, now I get it; he is comparing the building to his lady.

Use more paragraphs and less run on sentences. As it stands it is difficult to read.

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206
206
Review of Madman 17  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome to WDC. I like this flash piece. I wrote a similar story a while ago. Just to make it easier to read might I suggest space between paragraphs.

I think you might like the SCREAMS!!! contest. Entering contests is a good way to get to know people on here.

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
207
207
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome here to WDC,
Hope you like us, friends will be,
Drop in for a meal at the Talent Pond,
For seafood reviews, that you'll respond
To kind wishes for your writing here;
For this little poem, many cheers!

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
208
208
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome to WDC. This is an interesting piece which may well enlighten others here with regard to different faiths.

I have definitely lead my own path imperfectly.

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
209
209
Review of The Arch-nemesis  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
A bit rushed. Not sure if that was the word limit or your writing. The first section makes it sound like the mayor and his wife live in the safe.

An interesting tale nevertheless.

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210
210
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
And I can imagine the amount of mess a nine year old cook would make. Not that I'm much better. Some of the rhyming seemed a bit forced, the rhythm not quite right.

It tells a story, not just words strung together to look pretty like some poetry, so it appeals to me.

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211
211
Review of Sugar  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Tell me about it! If you did everything you were told you would starve. Gimmee, gimmee, gimmee.

I like this story because it rings true. Okay, there's no law against sugar(although there was rationing during the war)but we are discouraged from partaking.

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212
212
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
It is a shame you were limited to 1000 words; the end seemed rushed. You got in all the prompts quite cleverly. It's obvious you know the location well. I just wish you could have found a better way to let the reader know it's 1952. Show don't Tell.

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213
213
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I had intended to just read the first chapter and then review but I got so caught up in the story I had to finish it. I heard the voice of Humphry Bogart, or a youngster's impersonation of him, in some of the dialogue. Of all the [milk] bars ...

This teenager has been recycled many times over (I'm 65) but it still has appeal. What will Marty's next adventure be?

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214
214
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I don't pretend to be a poetry aficionado but I must say I don't associate seagulls with mountains. To me they are the plague of seaside holidays, nicking food right out of your hand, depositing on your head.

Maybe eagles would have been more appropriate?

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
215
215
Review of The Streak  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I'm still laughing !!!!! This is a well written expose of the doings of army cadets. Did the ladies return the compliment? No? We have more sense.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
216
216
Review of The Best Gift  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I have known many lives like this. Everything you say here is realistic. Your description of the first meeting and the hospital visits says so much.

I was too immersed in the story to proof read, but you are an experienced writer so probably would not be necessary any way.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
217
217
Review of Contest Entries  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Santa the murderer? Or is he the detective investigating the crime? Either way the line 'Mrs. Claus fell thrice' tells us a crime has been committed. I've tried fitting the words to the tune but not succeeded. However, I found the idea quite funny.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
218
218
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Funnily enough, I started an ex-wives/partners club for my ex. But nothing as innocent as this. We spent our time discussing the nasty things he had done to us and offering a shoulder to cry on to each new member.

Elements of my life with him have found their way into my writing on a number of occasions. I do hope this is pure fiction and you are not injuring women like your character.

Your years of experience show in your writing. I spotted no problems with spelling or grammar. A nice, heartwarming story on a cold, miserable day.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
219
219
Review of No Rhyme Today  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Your poetry is about the same standard as my own. Not exactly Wordsworth but having a good go. I like the idea of Ken the poet changing from rhyme to free verse. There are members on here who are experts, not just in the writing but in the knowledge of form and meter. It is worth looking at their ports to learn more.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
220
220
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
An interesting eulogy, with that famous Ausie humour shining through. I hope when I go that British stiff upper lip will not be evident in my eulogy. Always leave 'em laughing, that's my motto.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
221
221
Review of My life - Part 01  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I soon realised English is not your first language. You have done a good job considering this. Use a spell checker, revise your grammar and punctuation and most of all practice.

I see the start of a good story here, if slightly confused. Take each sentence, correct it, then use it as the start of a paragraph. Before you know it your English will improve and your story will begin to form a novel.

A simple exercise to improve description. Take the sentence 'the cat sat on the mat', then using synonyms, adjectives, adverbs, turn it into a paragraph.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
222
222
Review of Poor Muppett  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Poor Muppett, reminds me of my Casper. Was it a lizard or a croc? I spotted a couple of typos but otherwise no problems. I would be interested to read more tales from the bush from such a good storyteller.

Keep entering contests, it's good practice. And it gets you known within the WDC community.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
223
223
Review of All Cracked Up  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I loved this. (Cracked up in fact). We don't get much in the way of quakes in UK. The small one we did have in 1978 I thought was a dizzy spell. I do know about cracks though. Nasty one in my kitchen floor my landlord said he couldn't see.

This piece is well written with just the right amount of dialogue and description.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
224
224
Review of Circle: Chapter 1  
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: E | (1.0)
This is extremely difficult to read. Make your sentences shorter, use paragraphs. Also, this is nowhere near enough for a chapter. This is not so much a story as a stream of consciousness. Try some flash fiction before you move on to novels. Hone your skills.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
225
225
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: E | (5.0)
My entry -
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#2019098 by Not Available.


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