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Review Requests: ON
773 Public Reviews Given
774 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I like to say how I relate to an item. Spelling and grammar are less important.
I'm good at...
Giving encouragement
Favorite Genres
Thiller, Detective.
Least Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Sci-fi
Favorite Item Types
Short stories.
Least Favorite Item Types
Free verse.
I will not review...
Items over 4k words.
Public Reviews
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151
151
Review of The Dreamer  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 The Dreamer  (E)
The doctor had a theory about Andy's dreams. Now, it was time for the test.
#1692469 by BScholl


Initial Impressions

Short but sweet. Loved the ending.

Plot and characterisation

Not much time to develop character in this flash piece.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

With a bigger word limit you could have built on the descriptions of the setting. More detail of Andy could be added. Try working it up to a longer story.

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152
152
Review of Blind Justice  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
STATIC
Blind Justice  (E)
A peek inside the American justice system ... A Cliff Hanger Contest Winner
#2159669 by 🌕 HuntersMoon


Initial Impressions

Not just the American Justice System. I've done Jury Service in the UK.

Plot and characterisation

The jury deliberate. We see a variety of characters: the confused old lady, the anarchist, the cynic. None of them want to be there. Most don't even know what's going on.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I can't quite believe this diverse group would agree on anything. I hope this guy's life's not on the line.

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153
153
Review of Joey And Me  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Joey And Me  (E)
"Come on, slowpoke! I'll race you to the top!
#573054 by W.D.Wilcox


Initial Impressions

A story of two brothers playing in the snow. It starts innocently enough, with the usual sibling rivalry, then takes a turn for the worse.

Plot and characterisation

A simple enough tale but one which could have ended in tragedy. You give us enough to know that the younger is a daredevil, and the elder is protective.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I felt Billy's fear as Joey rolled under the truck. Wetting himself was a nice touch. With age comes wisdom. The younger still did not see danger, the older had already developed enough knowledge to see the risk.

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154
154
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
August Entry Word Count 1028  (13+)
Short story titled "Dandelions." Happy to be here and found this site!
#2257556 by E.O. McLendon


Initial Impressions

My old eyes struggled with the lack of any spaces in the writing (Hint). However, the writing made me soldier on.

Plot and characterisation

Sophia is an alcoholic. She is due a test to find out how much damage she has done to her liver. The wine she is contemplating reminds her of her childhood and her friend Miggy. It also brings back memories of the child she lost. It is very descriptive.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems. However, more spacing makes it easier to read from a screen.

Overall Impression

This is well written. Although new to the site you are obviously not new to writing. I don't know what your aims are - short stories, novels - but keep writing.

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155
155
Review of L'aura del Campo  
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Dear X Libris,

I am pleased to offer you the job so you can put that knife down now. Oh, you are just showing me an artefact, sorry, I thought ...

I understand that you would like to leave for Egypt on the night of the eighth. It just so happens that we have a sarcophagus flying out to the Cairo Museum that night. Bring your own oxygen tank.

I have decided to run the dig from here, so you will be working with Mr. Jones, known to his friends as 'Indiana' I believe.

Yours sincerely,

Mrs. Percy Shelley


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156
156
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 Back From the Cretaceous  (ASR)
Beware of the Dino Mites. Written like a journal.
#915377 by Kotaro


Initial Impressions

I'm itching already. We have enough parasites in the world. The thought of another - UGH!!!

Plot and characterisation

Your character shows the extreme of his or her phobia when the dog is put down.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Fact of life - parasites are becoming immune to the chemicals we use to destroy them. We may have to learn to live with the itch.

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157
157
Review of Jingle  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 Jingle  (E)
"No Dialogue" contest entry
#2223039 by Tanith


Initial Impressions

I hardly noticed a lack of dialogue in this charming little tale.

Plot and characterisation

The search for a Christmas gift is led by the sound of a bell. Sadie notices several other things on her journey.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I would like to visit this little town. You give a very clear description, especially of the book shop. She found the book, but did she find the bell?

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158
158
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Dear Diary (Entry 2-3)  (13+)
This is a part of a FICTIONAL STORY.
#2248708 by BakaBellflower


Initial Impressions

At first reading, I felt that some of the words used were not those of a ten year old, like 'preoccupied'.

Plot and characterisation

The second diary entry led to my understanding the first. I began to see things from Bella's point of view.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I would be interested to see where this is going. Is this the birth of a serial killer?

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159
159
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing " A baby isn't quite what it seems. " 

Initial Impressions

Your intro tells me you are new to the sight. You are, no doubt, nervous to post. You don't need to be.

Plot and characterisation

I've had two of them and your description is very accurate. I know that child; the crying, the demanding, not to mention what comes out of each end of something so tiny.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

You are off to a good start. Try one of the daily contests. It's not about the winning, it's about the taking part and becoming known in the community.

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160
160
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
The Flashes. Chapter 3.  (18+)
Scouting the Enemy.
#2145804 by Bruce.


Initial Impressions

A battle in some ancient time or other land. Morgan and Baldwin are mercenaries. They are sad that so many men lost their lives, but principally, they are upset they won't get paid.

Plot and characterisation

The two POV characters are well defined. The Duke is typical of senior officers; they know best.

Spelling and grammar

I saw no problems.

Overall Impression

The weaponry sets the time period, but this war could happen anywhere, any time. Mercenaries operate all over the world today, and they are not all as thoughtful as Morgan and Baldwin.

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161
161
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Letter of Complaint  (E)
The Treachery of Internet Shopping
#2247109 by PiriPica
as contest judge of "Invalid Item" 

You obviously have a lot of experience writing business letters. It is formatted perfectly. I like that you made your case in a detailed way. Quoting the appropriate legislation makes for a strong case.

Did this actually happen to you? A friend of mine ordered a ceramic figurine and only received a picture of the object. To make matters worse, she had shown the ad to several friends and they had ordered too.

Using Rene Magritte as your writer was a nice touch.


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162
162
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with Dreamweaver Bar & Grill  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Prequel to Love In Cheshire. Chapter 6.  (18+)
Judy and Kenny part company. Retro fiction.
#2114102 by Bruce.


Initial Impressions

As soon as I read the first paragraph I thought 'come on, Bruce, show, don't tell. Not sure how you would achieve that though. As I read on I recognised an all too familiar scenario, especially in that period.

Plot and characterisation

Yes, we get Kenny, the reluctant father. And he was quick to jump on the possibility that he was not the father. I'm not sure we know that much about Judy.

Spelling and grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

For a single chapter, this covers far too many scenes and time periods. I would like to see Kenny's house, get a better idea of what the characters look like. Start with that first paragraph, there are several scenes in that alone. Write some of it from Judy's POV so we learn more about her. Maybe have a section from Rachel's POV. Why was she so quick to spread the poison?

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163
163
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
STATIC
The night the circus came to town  (E)
It was going to be a break from boredom, and yet no one saw what was coming.
#2228666 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

You know right away you're in Australia. Unfortunately, long gone are the days of animal acts here in UK. You give a really good build up to the circus coming to town.

Plot and Characterisation

Fergus is excited by the circus and it shows. I also get Elsa the elephant, with her pacing and swaying.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Pity about the word limit. You build things up nicely but then you run out of steam. More detail about the storm and also about the aftermath would bring this to a better conclusion.

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164
164
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Be careful what you wish for.   (E)
Harry gets his desire, but is it really what he wants.
#2230009 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

The layout came up a bit weird but that's probably a site problem. Oh, boy, do I know the feeling of poo squelching between my toes(first dog), ripped up furniture(tenth dog), chewed specs(fifteenth). I even lost my Christmas dinner to a pair of hounds.

Plot and Characterisation

This covers a long period of time for a short story, which means more tell than show. Harry's character is not very developed, but Muttly's definitely is.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I take it there was a word limit. You could work on each section to build on this. More show, less tell. Overall, a story I can empathise.

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165
165
for entry "I Gotta Feeling" 
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing "I Gotta Feeling" for
FORUM
I Write in 2020  (E)
Write and review once a week for all of 2020
#2208028 by Aennaytte: Free & Wild in GoT


Initial Impression

Reminiscences from someone who knows the music industry. You take us on a journey through the work of the Black Eyed Peas from your personal perspective.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I have learned a lot from this item. I am a fan of Will.I.Am, but mainly from his part on the Voice here in UK. I didn't know about who produced the Black Eyed Peas music. I know this song but I would struggle to name any others.

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166
166
Review of The new kitchen  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 The new kitchen  (E)
Harry saves the day.
#2228824 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

My experience of barbecues is sitting under an umbrella trying to get the damp charcoal to ignite. British summers!

Plot and Characterisation

A story of two brothers taking different paths. Sam is attempting to show off to his new friends but has to revert to his roots in the end. Harry's character is well developed, the others less so.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Although this is a complete story, I could see it as a chapter in a book about the two siblings. How did Sam make his money? What was Harry's lifestyle? What else went wrong?

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167
167
Review of The Betrayal  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
The Betrayal  (18+)
A Taboo Words Words Contest Entry
#2230038 by Mastiff
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

At first I thought something really serious had been done and expected a horrible revenge. It was a good twist that it was all about a recipe.

Plot and Characterisation

When Mike arrives at the party he is a man on a mission. We learn quite a lot about him and a little about Jimmy.

Spelling and Grammar

Grammar and punctuation are fine but I did spot a few typos.

Overall Impression

A snapshot of family life. Could have been something more horrific.

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168
168
Review of We the People  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Although I am in the UK, I agree with the sentiments of your manifesto. You argue a good case for reform. Indeed the wealthy elite do rule not just your country but mine as well.

The current pandemic is a case in point. Both of our governments have put finances ahead of health. Hence, our countries have the highest death rates.

One thing I will say - maybe this is not the form of writing for using contractions. These are fine in fiction but not in an academic work.


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169
169
Review of Bad diet  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I am reviewing
Bad diet  (18+)
Jenny loses weight to find love
#2226412 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

Initially a dieting story, something we're all familiar with, this turned into a nice little horror story.

Plot and Characterisation

Jenny wants to loose weight to attract a mate. The mate she chose was definitely the wrong one. Jenny's character is fairly well developed. Tyrone is, of necessity, somewhat undiscovered until the end.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

A lot of guys prefer a more curvy girl, and not because they intend to eat them.

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170
170
Review of Paint job.  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
 Paint job.  (E)
Sarah’s not amused at the outcome of their attempt at decorating.
#2224490 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

I've moved so often this story is all too familiar. The neighbour popping round every five minutes is also familiar.

Plot and Characterisation

Sarah wants perfection. Bill wants company. John wants to please everybody. The house could be said to be a character as well. I could see both house and people.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

An interesting project might be to retell the story from the point of view of the house.

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171
171
Review of I Write In 2020  
for entry "The Huntress" 
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing
I Write In 2020  (E)
This book contains prose writings and poetry for various contests here on WDC.
#2209139 by 💙 Carly
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

I don't know how to review poetry because I don't know enough about it. But I'm going to have a go. I get the impression we're talking 'gold digger', I may be wrong.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no spelling errors but I don't know enough about form to comment.

Overall Impression

I can certainly visualise a woman, perfumed, decorated with diamonds, toying with her victim until she goes in for the kill.

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172
172
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I am reviewing
 Are you threatening me?  (13+)
An argument gets heated.
#2224392 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

A typical husband and wife argument but from the perspective of the cat.

Plot and Characterisation

It is a short piece so there is not time to really build characters but we have some sense of them (and their cat)

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

I think you need to make it clear in the second line that it is the husband and not the cat that is thinking. Maybe the cat should be more of the main character as the story ends when he leaves.

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173
173
Review by Odessa Molinari
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
I am reviewing
 
STATIC
Excite - Assignment 1  (18+)
First Meeting ~ Lesson 1, Excite
#2226036 by Mastiff
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

For an assignment it is going quite well. That first meeting is always a little awkward when there is an attraction and you captured that.

Plot and Characterisation

You established your characters at the beginning o the assignment. This would not happen in a story or novel. These details would have to come out in the writing.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

Maybe a bit more telling than showing. The drive to the farm could have been shown by hearing the voice of the satnav. It gets better once the dialogue starts.

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174
174
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I am reviewing
 Marcus and Milly. Chapter three  (13+)
Their relationship hits a bumpy ride
#2219312 by Sumojo
for "I Write in 2020" 

Initial Impression

The boyfriend meeting the parents. Always awkward but more so once they learn he's an ex-con. The only problem I had was the use of the present tense to relate a story which moves through several days.

Plot and Characterisation

Is the disapproval of her parents coming between them? I could feel the doubt, the anger, the frustration.

Spelling and Grammar

A few more spaces between paragraphs would make it easier to read from a screen.

Overall Impression

You are going in the right direction. The last part, where they make up, is maybe a bi rushed.

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175
175
Review of I Write In 2020  
Review by Odessa Molinari
In affiliation with I Write  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing "Nothing Good Ever Happens After 2 am" for
FORUM
I Write in 2020  (E)
Write and review once a week for all of 2020
#2208028 by Aennaytte: Free & Wild in GoT


Initial Impression

Nice little horror story but where is the rest of it?

Plot and Characterisation

I got the setting, the premise of breaking down in the middle of nowhere but no real feeling of the people involve.

Spelling and Grammar

I see no problems.

Overall Impression

This feels like the start of something but then it goes nowhere. I know you are limited by word count but lose some of the words you have already written so you can bring the story to a better conclusion.

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