|I am reading and reviewing entries in "The Christian Writing Contest" , and I'm honored to review your work.
My Thoughts: This was an interesting story, and I enjoyed reading it. You gave a lot of good examples of how horribly people sometimes treat others who are 'different'. While I could see where you were going with it, I think it strays away a bit from the parable. If I didn't know the prompt, I can't say that I would know what this was about - I'd think it was merely a pastor's reflection on the mistreatment of others.
The story did make me think about the misfortune of others and how we should work to be more considerate and accepting. I loved the title of the story and the phrase "to see a seed that found the ground of grace."
My Suggestions: In the first sentence, I would insert a comma after "musing". In the second sentence, I would change "wonder" to "wondered", because you began the story in past tense. In the third sentence, I would insert a comma after "eyes". A couple of sentences later, "might as will" should be "might as well". In the following sentence, a comma should be inserted after "pastor". In the sentence, "...left her a only a shell..." the first "a" should be omitted. In the following sentence, a comma should be inserted after "day". In the next-to-last sentence of that paragraph, "give" should be "gives". In that sentence, I would insert a hyphen after "hope". In the third sentence of the following paragraph, "who" should be "whom". Near the end of that paragraph, "I is as if..." should be "It is as if..." In that same sentence, I would omit "but her". In the last paragraph, "a find" should be "I find". In that paragraph, I would change "thanksgiving" to "thanks" and insert a comma after the word. In the last sentence, a comma should be inserted after "day".
Overall: Thank you for providing this interesting read. I look forward to reading more of your work.
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