Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

I wish – the use of italics works well for internal thought.

night that - “that” is not needed.

years so – years, so

"Really?" She - "Really?" she

traffic talking - traffic, talking

go, what's - go; what's

Luckily I – Luckily, I

"Hey Oliver, - new paragraph

happily, "I knew – happily. **"I knew – this is new paragraph.

mom." I teased. - mom," I teased.

years, and – no comma

math." Oliver - math," Oliver

jokingly, "Yeah, - jokingly. **"Yeah, - this is new paragraph

"Whatever." he – "Whatever," he

smile, "Alright, Collins. - smile, "alright, Collins,

chat, "Ok, - chat. **"Ok, - new paragraph

Nathan?" My - Nathan?" my

friend, "I'm fine." I - friend. **"I'm fine," I – new paragraph

"Do you – new paragraph

know that - “that” is not needed

tonight and - tonight, and

yeah." He - yeah," he

This just – new paragraph

"Nathan, - new paragraph

even – used twice in same sentence – one can be deleted.

him." I - him," I

Wondered - wandered

paperwork, I - paperwork. I

strong, that – no comma

screams, "I don't – screams. **"I don't – new paragraph

him, "You - him. ** "You – new paragraph

you." I - you," I

heart and - heart, and

head, I – head. I

up and – up, and

I lied - I laid

because my – because of my

while put - while putting

me, "Nathan." I - me. **"Nathan," I – new paragraph

faintly, "Well - faintly. **"Well – new paragraph

Shined - shone

papers and – papers, and

him and – him, and

tall thin - tall, thin

this she – this, she

up, then – no comma

times they - times, they

others she - others, she

response she - response, she

with, and – no comma

beside if – beside, it

face she - face, she

nose and – nose, and

point he - point, he

respects, and – no comma

season and - season, and

him One - him. One

abilities his - abilities, his

time she - time, she

ring and - ring, and

afternoon his – afternoon, his

day his – day, his

Leave a space between paragraphs for easier reading.

years now, - years now.

house, and – no comma

team and – team, and

war, and – no comma

tonight; it – tonight, it

time Ed - time, Ed

first it - first, it

pack, then – no comma

can and - can, and

truck, unable - no comma

her, or – no comma

chair, and – no comma

eleven she – eleven, she

his paints - his pants

pulse, and – no comma

Leave a space between paragraphs for easier reading.

years now, - years now.

house, and – no comma

team and – team, and

war, and – no comma

tonight; it – tonight, it

time Ed - time, Ed

first it - first, it

pack, then – no comma

can and - can, and

truck, unable - no comma

her, or – no comma

chair, and – no comma

eleven she – eleven, she

his paints - his pants

pulse, and – no comma

months I – months, I

door, and – no comma

Lately some – Lately, some

out, or – no comma

in yard – in the yard

truss” I - truss,” I

busted trough - busted through

roof truss - roof trusses

could. they - could. They

shop, and – no comma

Bangor, and – no comma

first it – first, it

week, and - no comma
farm I - farm, I

shelves and – shelves, and

out I – out, I

around,” I – around.” I

room, and – no comma

farm I - farm, I

face, and - no comma

down, and – no comma

away?” He - away?” he

away, and – no comma

turned, and – no comma

yell “What – yell, “What

gumption and – gumption, and

morning, and – no comma

“Tommy,” - “Tommy.”

trouble, with – no comma

away, and – no comma

away, and – no comma

walk Mr. - walk, Mr.

Bennett, before – no comma

“Sure,...” - “Sure....”

to bun - to burn

sides, and – no comma

walk she – walk, she

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

morning, I - morning. I

mind which – mind, which

definatly - definitely

day, it - day; it

unnaturaly – unnaturally

that im - that I'm

uncomftable – uncomfortable

clock which - clock, which

hard cold - hard, cold

throbed - throbbed

wardrobe which - wardrobe, which

legs, this - legs. This

scavanged - scavenged

buisness - business

something, and – no comma

Thats when - That's when

hanging of - hanging on

out, has - out; has

unfamilier - unfamiliar

figuered - figured

missused - misused

coopurate - cooperate

body, It - body. It

sleves - sleeves

t-shirt and - t-shirt, and

quarted lenghts - quarter lengths

different, that - different; that

knew, maybe - knew; maybe

day and - day, and

and quite. - and quiet.

detest, was – no comma

scales which – scales, which

usual; To - usual; to

occastional – occasional

tounge - tongue

teeth, slight – teeth; slight

somekind - some kind

believeable - believable

,thats - ,that's

door, cracked - door; cracked

opening yanking - yanking

us mutants, - we, mutants,

baby, I – baby; I

creatures, all - creatures; all

is, other - is; other

desk learning - desk, learning

here so - here, so

long and - long, and

them, you - them; you

breakes - breaks
day, or – no comma

loath, it - loath; it

hour', in – hour'. In

up, no, - up. No,

dies or - dies, or

there dorms - their dorms

shared, I - shared; I

now Im - now I'm

centered and - centered, and

to, wearing - too wearing

suit, what - suit; what

Darcy!" A - Darcy!" a

familier - familiar

favoured - favorite

place I had, came - place came

hall's - halls

me she - me, she

your weak. - you're weak.

Im not - I'm not

away so - away, so

joy, something - joy; something

unnaturaly - unnaturally

equaly - equally

human, while – no comma

and butt - and the butt

jokes which - jokes, which

"'Sup." I – "'Sup," I

laugh, why - laugh. Why

up Darko." She - up, Darko," she

encoraged - encouraged

name, I - name. I

response - response

andslaughtered hundrends – and slaughtered hundreds

judgeing - judging

storys - stories

alive, or – no comma

non existant - nonexistent

forgotten?" She - forgotten?" she

humerous – humorous

wear, was - wear. Was

laughed, I - laughed. I

expresstion – expression

face, she - face. She

compaines!" She – companies!" she

mimicing - mimicking

tone, she - tone. She

on!" She - on!" she

excitement - excitement

me which – me, which

and brought. - and bought.

lessons we learnt - lessons, we learned

equivelent - equivalent

later, she - later; she

on her defence, - in her defense,

prosess - process

being brought - being bought

front, and – no comma

line, you - line; you

quicker." I - quicker," I

powers, you - powers; you

risk." She - risk," she

there." I – there," I

tounge – tongue

mimcked - mimicked

defencive responce. - defensive response.

chair, yeah that - chair; yeah, that

mimicing - mimicking

speackers - speakers

be properly, - be, properly,

suprising - surprising

roughtly - roughly

frount – front

forward - forward

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

The story has present and past tense. Select one and stay with it.

knew that - that is not needed. Take a look at the word that in the story. If the sentence makes sense without it, delete it.

hands I – hands, I

captain or – captain, or

“Pull!” Fifteen - “Pull!” fifteen

hold, “Say – hold. “Say

moment, “Why - moment. “Why

away and – away, and

battered and - battered, and

me nothing - me, nothing

time what - time, what

dream the – dream, the

eye, “Put – eye. “Put

“Túlio why - “Túlio, why

implied, “Which – implied. “Which

me, “Look – me. “Look

focusses - focuses

task, “Quick, - task. “Quick,

breath and - breath, and

battle I - battle, I

ends and - ends, and

all but - all, but

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

2 inch - two

suit that - suit, that

Levis and - Levis, and

bag and - bag, and

grunted, as – no comma

cap, before – no comma

on," then – no comma

Gods green - God's green

eye he - eye, he

grinned, and – no comma

C-130, it - C-130; it

5, " replied - 5," replied

replied, then – no comma

there, it's - there; it's

fire confined - fire, confined

noise, as – no comma

right, Dante's - right; Dante's

rim Charlie - rim, Charlie

ridge a - ridge, a

shuddered, then – no comma

elevator, as – no comma

stubbing a tow - stubbing a toe

saw, as – no comma

bounced and - bounced, and

red, then – no comma

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

help, it - help; it

chair, and - no comma

old, and – no comma

moment, then – no comma

away, and – no comma

safe.” came - safe,” came

good, because – no comma

answers why - answers for why

questions which - questions, which

debatable, - no comma

white and - white, and

passing, but - no comma

contact, but – no comma

notice, was – no comma

stones, and – no comma

him.” He - him,” he

commands, and – no comma

arm and - arm, and

quietly. “Are - quietly, “Are

“Absolutely. I - “Absolutely, I

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

muscular and - muscular, and

vest, and – no comma

mouth, and - no comma

"What?" came - What? Came – italics work well for internal spech.

sat, and – no comma

Saddlebag, - no comma

bush, and – no comma

hand, and – no comma

water, then – no comma

stringer, and – no comma

Brutus, and – no comma

fire, then – no comma

pocket, then – no comma

pain, and – no comma

area wanting – area was wanting

claws and – claws, and

vest and – vest, and

himself, and – no comma

paws and - paws, and

coat, and – no comma

awake, and – no comma

talk, when – no comma

stirrup, and – no comma

warm and - warm, and

through the - through, the

Finally the - Finally, the

and soft - and a soft

road lead - road led

"Horse,"" - 'Horse',”

Brutis – Brutus

"Me, and – no comma

grin, and – no comma

night, and - no comma

room, or – no comma

fiver, and – no comma

Brutus, then – no comma

mother and – mother, and

Turning back – some verbs are present tense in this paragraph.

around, then – no comma

Gideon lead - Gideon led

dust, or – no comma

chin, and – no comma

"All right. - verbs present tense

woodsline, and – woodline and

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Mine, and – no comma

later the – later, the

shoulders, - no comma

so, but – no comma

knelt, and - no comma

agreement, and - no comma

bit, and go – no comma

bit, and some – no comma

bucket, and - no comma

briefly, then – no comma

true, and – no comma

nodded, and – no comma

years, and – no comma

shaft, then – no comma

one, then – no comma

hole, and – no comma

corner, and – no comma

work, and – no comma

quickly, and – no comma

John and - John, and

debris, and – no comma

hole, and – no comma

mightly hands - mighty

ran, but – no comma

back, and – no comma

Washington and - Washington, and

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

soothingly, "We - soothingly, "we

and blissful - and blissfully

nose, "You're - nose, "you're

closely, "But - closely. "But

neck, "You'll - neck. "You'll

smiled, "Take - smiled. "Take

inside, "Hmm... - inside. "Hmm...

"let - "Let

"By something - "Buy something

Sara, "Well - Sara, "well

away, she – away; she

backseat and - backseat, and

reverie, and - no comma

hurting, I'm - hurting; I'm

hungry, but – no comma

packages, then - no comma

over and - over, and

crying she'd - crying, she'd

cupboard and – cupboard, and

tea and – tea, and

them and - them, and

match and - match, and

good and - good, and

up and - up, and

twins, she - twins; she

face, "Right, - face. "Right,

Susie and - Susie, and

Sara and - Sara, and

cups and - cups, and

tray and - tray, and

twins' – twins
napkins and - napkins, and

down and - down, and

porch, she - porch. She

papers and - papers, and

door and - door, and

answered she - answered, she

twist," Abigail - twist." Abigail

sobbing, "Parents - sobbing, "parents

paramedic, "what - paramedic. "What

shoulder, "I - shoulder. "I

inquiry and - inquiry, and

shoulder, "The - shoulder, "the

soon, he - soon; he

respects and - respects, and

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

shelter, and – no comma

that, she - that; she

better,” her - better.” Her

shield, then – no comma

box, “and – box. “And

daughter, “come - daughter. “Come

canvases, the - canvases; the

grateful, she - grateful; she

and...unsatisfying. - and … unsatisfying.

sighed, the – sighed; the

treetops, then – no comma

interesting” - interesting.”

Ondus, because – no comma

amd something – and

again, this - again; this

now, and - no comma

tan, but – no comma

vanished and - vanished, and

off, “There - off. “There

screamed, and – no comma

nothing,” - nothing.”

day, it - day; it

onwards, and – no comma

gone, in it's place an - gone, in it's place was an

shadow and - shadow, and

streets and - streets, and

to, everything - to. Everything

dark, and - no comma

there, in – no comma

warily, then – no comma

light, and – no comma

again, and – no comma

possible...I...I...have - possible … I … I … have

spoke, she - spoke; she

grab, it - grab. It

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

return the - return the

one, and – no comma

heretical, and – no comma

sensation, and - no comma

strain, “I - strain. “I

anything, or – no comma

intent, and – no comma

him, and – no comma

dais, and – no comma

throne, his - throne; his

sat he - sat, he

Cathart, and – no comma

teeth, “I - teeth. “I

stammer, “Did - stammer. “Did

up, her - up; her

home, my - home; my

dine and - dine, and

abruptly, “Just - abruptly. “Just

time, this - time; this

himself and - himself, and

incinerator Gallus, make - incinerator, Gallus. Make

go, and – no comma

years, and – no comma

musing, and - no comma

he muttered – use quote marks or if it is internal then use italics and change muttered to thought

drained, I - drained; I

Anjor, and – no comma

want” Tibelor – want,” Tibelor

nothing” - nothing.”

again, and – no comma

Anjor's, and – no comma

moment, he - moment; he

him, the – him. The

you go” - you go.”

alive, we - alive; we

intersection, and – no comma

fingers, “The - no comma

stand, and – no comma

haste Tibelor - haste, Tibelor

thoughts, “Why - thoughts. Why – italics work well for internal thought.

sensation, and – no comma

others' sympathy – other's

the heal - the healing

empathy, you - empathy; you

yourself, but – no comma

that, he - that; he

emotion, although it – emotion; although, it

drifting and - drifting, and

nothing, I - nothing; I

hesitated, then mumbled “if - hesitated then mumbled, “If

“No.” Anjor - “No,” Anjor

dare...how could...I am...” - dare … how could … I am....”

cold, the - cold. The

open, and – no comma

I,” he - I?” he

hope, give - hope; give

stone, and – no comma

boots, and – no comma

regret, and – no comma

was; hope. - was: hope.

emotionless, “What - emotionless. “What

moments they - moments, they

free,” Tibelor - free.” Tibelor

glared, “You - glared. “You

doubts his - doubts, his

Anjor, and – no comma

before, and – no comma

morning, he - morning; he

training, and – no comma

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

that, or – no comma

of any more were - of were

crashes...except – crashes … except

happened then, it - happened, then it

room, because – no comma

could, and - no comma

"Figures." He – "Figures," he

here." Cameron – here," Cameron

I'm..." - I'm--" suggest this for an interuption.

know." She - know," she

back, and- no comma

up and - up, and

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

stop a train – if this is before trains use a different idea.

she wass – she was

side.” Drel - side,” Drel

“Hello.” Stramula - “Hello,” Stramula

joke.” Drel - joke,” Drel

Celeste shaked – Celeste shook

shot.” Celeste - shot,” Celeste

care.” Kormina - care,” Kormina

Celeste.” Kormina - Celeste,” Kormina

again.” Celeste - again,” Celeste

you.” Kormina - you,” Kormina

on.” Celeste - on,” Celeste

“Xanderi-” Celeste - “Xanderi--” Celeste

bag.” Maximus - bag,” Maximus

claming Kormina - claiming Kormina

anyone.” He – anyone,” he

true.” He - true,” he

in town square - in the town square

They are all - They were all

anyone.” She - anyone,” she

incident.” The – incident,” the

again. There - again, or there

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Space between paragraphs makes for easier reading.


here, he - here; he

he acknowledge - he acknowledged

uneasiness, his - uneasiness; his

"Breathe," He - Breathe, he – italics work well for internal thought.

next, that is - next; that is

hadn't went - hadn't gone - Went takes no auxiliary verb.

written, and – no comma

"SCREEEEEE" Went - "SCREEEEEE" went

cue Jensen's - cue, Jensen's

only socked - only sockets

skin. Sharp - skin, sharp

softly then - softly, then

leaving and - leaving an

grinded his - ground his

him he - him; he – it not clear who is stepping. If it the man, then - he stepped slowly closer and put himself in its
if it is the creature - it stepped slowly closer and put itself in his

over came - overcame

Rotting flesh – a verb is needed here

where they empty but - were they empty, but

soul, then – no comma

All while - All the while

free the - free, the

hells deepest - hell's deepest


Instinctively his - Instinctively, his

fall…” He - fall… he

hands Jensen - hands, Jensen

hands, and – no comma

wall he - wall, he

battle he had - battle he'd had

fighting, was – no comma

Gods Angels - God's Angels

escape slowly he - escape; slowly, he

miniscule - minuscule

hours Jensen - hours, Jensen

Squinting he - Squinting, he

Slowly Jensen - Slowly, Jensen

He mumbled - he mumbled

cold, a - cold; a

toe, a - toe. A

sleeve nope, that - sleeve. Nope, that

definitely him - definitely not him

crinkled and - crinkled, and

onward, “Out - onward, “out

it, ever - it; ever

boy strange – boy, strange

around them - around him

back yard he remembers - backyard. He remembered

yard he - yard, he

bones, it - bones; it

obtained, do - obtained. Do

dilapidating - dilapidated

shower then - shower, then

a little dilapidated – this condition has been established.

implanted oh - implanted on

tell, and the world in which - tell and the world which

shirt, and – no comma

“Excuse me.,” Jensen - “Excuse me,” Jensen

me,” He - me,” he

around, Jensen- around. Jensen

pure discuss. - pure disgust.

out, his - out. His

audible, it – audible; it

sir I’d - sir, I’d

room” Jensen - room,” Jensen

off of his - off his

The mad - The man

evening” the - evening,” the

sleep the - sleep, the

check in - check-in

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

*knew – Most of the time knew can be deleted, going directly to the action. * He knew the Asmodens wouldn’t rush - *The Asmodens wouldn’t rush....

none the less – nonetheless

now but – now, but

noises and – noises, and

1 bedroom – one

“never!” - “Never!”

the Asmodens - the Asmoden's

shouted out. - shouted.

that was - that were

** This is an awkward paragraph - The Asmodens were known for their skills with the blade, so Scott knew he would have to be on his toes and use his agility advantage he had over them and hope that his own skills with the sword could find an opening. ** I have this suggestion:

** The Asmodens were skillful with blades, and Scott's only advantage would be his agility, so he watched carefully for an opening.**

the miscues – is this muscles?

Asmoden stab - Asmoden to stab

Three down, three to go. - Three down, three to go. - Italics can be effective for showing internal speech.

mentality has - mentality had

men and him, himself wouldn’t - men, and he wouldn’t

time. Scott – time, Scott

The lead – this is a new paragraph. There are a number of paragraphs that are not separated by space between. These can be found by looking at underlying codes in your document.

ones attack - one's attack

shirt he was wearing, and - shirt, and

strength, he spun - strength, spun

wood, He - wood. He

demons head - demon's head

brow, “It’s - brow. “It’s

staircase and – staircase, and

alleyway which - alleyway, which

bellowing - billowing

soon” Scott - soon,” Scott

closed the – closed, the

Getting to - Coming to

alleyway which - alleyway, which

Scott’s and - Scott’s, and

grey fur – this has been mentioned.

Helsing and – Helsing, and

was all about ready - was ready

creature and - creature, and

free but - free, but

parents’ house - parent's house

got it, - got in,

parents’ house - parent's house

Madonna threw - Madonna banged - Madonna threw gives an odd visual picture.

again, she - again; she

hoped that Trish - delete that

muttering “I - muttering, “I

before stopped - before stopping

bedroom she - bedroom, she

bed she - bed, she

knew that she - delete that

screamed “Hello? - screamed, “Hello?

forward, “I - forward. “I

area, and being ushered - area and were ushered

tugged to - tugged at - seems to fit better

them…animals - them … animals

he’d realized - he realized

decorated on each - decorated each

his whispered - he whispered

cracked and - cracked, and

do.” Lark’s - do,” Lark’s

please…” - please.…” for a pause at the end of a sentence add the period.

Other lied - Other laid

stopped and - stopped, and

triumph he - triumph, he

** note** one of the prompt words, shattered, was missing from the story.

out and - out, and

weekend but - weekend, but

hat but - hat, but

“No …” - “No--" suggest this for an abrupt end.

and with - and, with

for but - for, but

knew and - knew, and

downward. . - downward.

him and - him, and

followed and - followed, and

teeth Thomas - teeth, Thomas

up, and - no comma

did, and - no comma

thought. There's - thought, there's

widen and - widen, and

then, and - no comma

Suddenly he - Suddenly, he

head, and - no comma

dream, all - dream; all

"Remember - "remember

fell and - fell, and

"She. . .just. . .left." - "She . . . just . . . left."

Halloween and - Halloween, and

again and - again, and

room and - room, and

I is very - I are very

soon and - soon, and

robe and - robe, and

hat and - hat, and

head, and - no comma - {if you added a subject - and she left - then a comma would be used}

Midnight, she - Midnight, she - italics for internal thought works well - just my suggestion.

sound, and - no comma - same reason as before.

cackled, and - no comma - same reason as before.

inside, and slapping - delete and

out, and - no comma

light she - light, she {introductory phrase} {see "Invalid Item" 

word it - word, it - {introductory phrase}

hands, and - no comma

lantern, and - no comma

here, someone - here; someone

her, and - no comma {wrapping and lifting}

drowsy, and - no comma

One an - One was an

hair, and - no comma

men; one - men: one

eyes; the - eyes and the

her, and - no comma

position, and - no comma

finished her - finished, her - {introductory phrase}

down, and - no comma

coherent,” the - coherent.” The

again she - again, she - {introductory phrase}

slowly, and - no comma

bed, and - no comma

closer the - closer, the - {introductory phrase}

head, and - no comma

ash it - ash, it - {introductory phrase}

face; then - no semicolon

over, and - no comma

sleep, and - no comma

chest, and - no comma

him, and - no comma

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

exposure; wandering - exposure from wandering

Emily; had - Emily had

Apparently not - Apparently, not

“Ewwwwww!, You - delete comma

mirror; over - mirror over

was ’de sha vu’ to - was ’deja vu’ to

thoughts; moves and - thoughts, moves, and

intents, to - no comma

supernatural; far - no semicolon

them; nurtured and - them, nurtured, and

of errand - of an errand

question, to - no comma

dialect, and - no comma

disagreements; some - disagreements, some

years, however neither - years; however, neither

up. Always - up, always

floor, but - no comma

Associates, her - Associates. Her