I find the sestina one of the most difficult poetic forms to write. You have done a masterful job here. The cadence and the rhythym of the poem suggest the poem's theme of movement and stillness, our essential machine, lub-dub, systole and diastole. I learned a new word, too! "atramentarious"
What a wonderful piece of writing. Filled with such searing, unique details, it tells your story without self-conciousness or self-pity. Different as we may be, there are details that resonate so strongly, and if I met you on the street I would be sure to smile and say hello.
I love this poem for capturing the essence of who you are....you have a fresh, original voice....and you don't gloss over the fact that we all sometimes wear a mask or a falsefront in order to be accepted and liked.
It occurs across all social stratums.
I want to encourage you to continue to write out of your own true experience, this is where true poetry resides, and to keep learning and growing, and being strong...Blessings!
Emerin---I thank you for entering my contest and gifting me with such a lovely poem.
I am touched by the last 3 concluding lines.
The contest ends midnight tonight while the blue moon watches over us while we sleep. I'll be judging the winners this week-end and will keep everyone posted. Thanks again for entering!
I applaud your intelligent presentation of a complex subject.
As a participant in the Unity Church for many years I am familiar with Emmett Fox and other New Thought teachers, though never have encountered Thomas Troward.
I do believe, however, that the abolition of war, sickness, violence, is far more complicated than what our internal beliefs are. Even if we ever reached a mass critical point where most of humanity was focused in this direction, I don't believe we would see an absence of what we perceive as the negative.
Yes, our thoughts are powerful and generative. But I don't think that's the whole story. I think there is still mystery in the Universe---and always will be...
I like the way you have set up your webpage. It is easy to navigate and presents who you are---starting with the opening poem.
I have no experience dealing with webpages---but the spareness and straightforward presentation of yours may inspire me to use this as an example for my own.
You have captured a deep understanding inherent in Christian mysticism and expressed it well. Christ's understanding and teaching was rooted firmly in Judaism. There is a clear and coherent Judaic tradition of God and man enjoined as lovers. Traditional Jews still welcome the Shabbat as the Shekinah--the embodiment of wisdom--as the bride of God. This is the metaphorical meaning of the "Song of Solomon".
I have a wonderful, Pentecostal friend--a former stripper--who has told me that Jesus is the best boyfriend she's ever had!
May you grow in wisdom and in grace. A Reviewathon Reviewer
This is lovely--a lovely tribute to your grandmere. I'd encourage you to write more about her with more specific detailed remembrances if her life. Keep writing!
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