| My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.
An unnamed narrator works in a morgue where strange things happen.
WHAT I LIKED
I liked the how the story flowed. It was quick and easy to read, easy to visualize.
This is told in the first person by an unnamed narrator. Good job with narration. Past tense is used appropriately.
There's a good blend of dialogue and narration. I would suggest an edit for dialogue tags. Use only "he said" or "she replied" in tags to identify the speaker only, if you have to. Put action in a seperate sentence. Put the action first, then the dialogue.
FOR EXAMPLE, AS WRITTEN: "Settle down all you Dead Heads" I yelled.
MY SUGGESTION: "Settle down all you dead heads!" Surprisingly, for a moment, they did.
There's enough to set the scenes, but this is something that could be expanded on. I might suggest tapping into scent. I can't imagine the morgue smells all that great. You can amp up the details by adding a couple of foul scents that make the stomach turn.
TIME: modern day
PLACE: urban setting
This is something that is clarified enough for the reader.
There's enough here to understand his motivations. He just wants to make it through the night.
I might suggest a minor edit for punctuation and spelling. For example, "seams" should be "seems."
Suggestions as mentioned above. The opening engages the reader. Good first person voice. Write on!