StephBee - House Targaryen's (sgcardin) Reviews

StephBee - House Targaryen

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3,924 Public Reviews Given

4,136 Total Reviews Given

51

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#4741346

Review of Exercising Faith

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

GAMES OF THRONES CNOTE REVIEW

This is a review for "Exercising Faith"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE CNOTES

Exercising Faith Cnotes are a heartwarming collection of cnotes that are faith inspired with quotes from the Bible.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked the whimiscal graphic used for "A little Joy" which caught my attention most, but I also liked the heartwarming message for friendship, and I thought the graphic for "Hear my plea" struck a poignant chord.

ENGAGING

The cnotes offer a nice variety of messages, that while faith based, aren't too preachy to those who aren't of a Christian background. These are cnotes anyone of faith would feel comfortable using.

VARIETY

There are three cnotes in the collection. In that regard, I would like to see the collection expanded.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML in the introduction to "hook" the viewer and get them excited. They help to set the mood and tone of the collection.

PARTING THOUGHTS

Very creative and inspirational. I thought the Cnotes had a nice price point that WDC members could afford. I would recommend this collection for WDC Members.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

52

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14 days may be credited.

#4741343

Review of Elegant Poetry cNotes

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

GAMES OF THRONES CNOTE REVIEW

This is a review for "Event Notes"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE CNOTES

Elegent Poetry Cnotes combines easy on the eyes visual, nature inspired graphics with verses of poetry that is meant to inspire, motivate, and spread positivity.

WHAT I LIKED

I really liked the fact the photos used in the cnotes were original photography and that they were mixed with original poetry from authors here on WDC. That was a really nice way to bring community members togethe.

ENGAGING

The cnotes offer a nice variety of colors which catch the reader's eye. Due to the creativity, the viewer needs to slow down and "smell the roses" so to speak, but it is a task that is nice to do. It also allows the viewer time to pair up the cnote that is just perfect for the intended recipient.

VARIETY

There are nine cnotes which offer a nice amount of variety. There were a lot of choices with a focus on nature such as spring or the sea.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML in the introduction to "hook" the viewer and get them excited.

PARTING THOUGHTS

I love how heartwarming the cnotes where and I thought they were very creative! Well done. I highly recommend this collection for WDC Members.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

53

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#4740775

Review of Tristeza

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (3.5)

GAMES OF THRONES ESSAY REVIEW

This is a review for "Tristeza"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE ESSAY

Written in 2020, a mother struggles with the restrictions that Covid-19 has set on the nation.

WHAT I LIKED

The essay tackles a very recent topical subject. It paints an accurate picture of what was going on at the time and the emotional whiplash parents had to deal with.

CONTENT

I am not familiar with the title. The essay is not long. It describes the problem and offers ideas to deal with the lockdown, but no solutions. The danger of kids leaning on the computer for interaction is a bit scary. The last part of the essay tugs on the heartstrings.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. I might suggest a minor edit for punctuation. I might also suggest increasing the font to make it easier for the reader's eyes on WDC.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I think a lot of parents can connect with the author's push/pull of acknowledging their children seek a cortisol boost by being on the computer doing other things than homework and wanting to offer them something other than the quick, addictive fix.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

54

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#4740768

Review of 10 Days of Spring

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (3.0)

GAMES OF THRONES BOOK REVIEW

This is a review for "10 Days of Spring"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE BOOK

The book contains 7 entries and is fantasy themed.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked the title. It caught my attention and made me curious about the book.

INTRODCUTION

The introduction is very plain and doesn't really set an idea in the reader's mind what to expect. I might suggest expanding the introduction by creating a 3-5 sentence blurb that teases what the plot is about. A more fleshed out blurb could also be used here. If so, I would use the first paragraph to explain the hero or heroine, the next paragraph to explain the conflict, and the last to set the rising action.

I would also using a graphic to set the tone or mood of the book.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. on the introduction or the chapter headings. If anything, I might suggest using a larger font in the entries as the current is hard to read on the eyes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The book has a lot of potential but none of the entries have been developed since 2014. The entries are short which encourages the reader to pop in, read, and move on.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

55

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#4740758

Review of In the end

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

GAMES OF THRONES POEM REVIEW

This is a review for "In the end"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE POEM

The poem takes a look at what could be a modern plight for people who have no money and struggle without it.

WHAT I LIKED

The poem offers several questions for the reader to ponder. What is the power of money? Why do we let people who have none live in such poverty? Can we do better as a society? Is this nature vs nuture? Very topical questions for our society to tackle.

STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no set rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. I might suggest a minor edit for punctuation. There are ("") after Hold your head high which seems oddly placed. Another minor suggestion - I might suggest making the font bigger on WDC so it is easier to visually read.

DESCRIPTIONS

The descriptions are very "succinct," for example -- "breath a cloud of stale liquor" and "tattered clothes, clutching a fistful of dirt." The descriptions put the reader in the moment and tug on the heartstrings.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I liked this stanza:

"Broke people.
Broke-n people.
Broken."

The simple stanza invites the reader to delve into the progression of how broke people become broken. The poem is easy to read, but challenges one to take a long, hard look at life at its rawest.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

56

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#4740753

Review of Romanticism Poem

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

GAMES OF THRONES POEM REVIEW

This is a review for "Romanticism Poem"

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE POEM

A divine look at nature from it's simplest, humblest vantage point, to the deep pondering mystery of what nature offers the soul.

WHAT I LIKED

The poem challenges a reader's critical thinking - giving them the opportunity to see the physical nature nature around them, then challenges the reader to go deeper - what or who brings us the beauty of nature that soothes the soul?

STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no set rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. The poem is easy to read. I might suggest using WDC ML to make the font bigger so it is easier to read on WDC.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "Among the stars, a trailing beck," I can close my eyes and visualize a blazing trail of fire, like a comet, visiting each star.

SETTING

I could picture myself standing on the roof of a tall building and looking out into the night pondering the world around me.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

Suggestion as mentioned above. The poem invites a visual full of nature, yet taps into the power of the spiritual to make a poignant connection to the reader.

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

57

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14 days may be credited.

#4740746

Review of I am jobless

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (3.5)

GAMES OF THRONES POEM REVIEW

This is a review for "I am jobless "

from House Targaryen for "Game of Thrones"

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

THE POEM

Does being an overachiever disadvantage others?

WHAT I LIKED

The poem tackles a very topical subject for the modern day and challenges the reader to look at the differences between the overachiever and the jobless. Is there a middle ground? Could the unemployed storyteller have been more tactful in getting his point across? Would that have kept him the job? Questions to ponder.

STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no set rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. I might suggest a minor edit for punctuation. There is a (") after matches your character which seems oddly placed.

DESCRIPTIONS

The descriptions are very "to the point," for example -- "he stares at me." In that regard, the descriptions do a good job of matching the harsh tone of the poem.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The poem is easy to read. The mood of the poem is somber. No likes losing a job.

The poem reflects the reality of life. Even friends, who gifted with an advantage, find it a struggle to think of others when money is involved. "Money makes people funny" is an expression that rings true time and time again. Another thing I thought of - when two sides are polar opposite, how can there be reconciliation?

Reviewed by StephB for House Targaryen

Sigil for Game of Thrones 2024

58

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14 days may be credited.

#4737853

Review of Crashing Waves

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

A day at the beach framed between the waves that crash on the seashore.

WHAT I LIKED

I loved how the poem progressed to tell a story. Well done!

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem. There were no set rythming patterns.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/ punctuation mistakes. The poem is easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "Dark clouds gather ominously above the scavenging seagulls"

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I have no suggestions for improvement. The poem progressed line by line as it told it's story. I could picture everything. I loved how the repetition of the last line, "crash upon the seashore" ties the poem together. Very good storytelling!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM
"Anniversary Reviews"

59

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#4737394

Review of Shadow Over July

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

July is a steady month - known for summer and vacations, but as memories fade, just how steady was it?

WHAT I LIKED

I liked the visuals the poem evoked. Simple, yet succinct word play puts the reader in the moment.

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem. There was no set rythme patterns.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML to make the poem easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "as the skies cast shadows over July."

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I have no suggestions for improvement. With few words the author conveys vivid visuals and evokes emotions well. Everyone thinks of July as summer. It's time to enjoy the nice weather, play, go on vacations, and yet, every so often, carefree summer can be haunted by shadows. While the poem hints at weather changes and life obligations, I think uncertainty can be whatever is challenging you in your own life. It's this juxapostion, well done, that dares the reader to go deeper.

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#4737278

Review of Storm Music

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

The poem tells a story through weather and storms that mirror the highs and lows of our own life.

WHAT I LIKED

I loved the word play; it deepened the expression of the poem. I felt like I went a journey and discovered my own weathered traveled life.

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem. There was no set rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. The poem is easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "Rainbows ribboned across sunlit skies" Great visual with succinct wording.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I have no suggestions for improvement. The title fits the poem well. A great read that challenges the reader to take time and reflect, leaving one on a positive note.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM
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61

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#4736736

Review of Light

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

A poem about light, the power of it's reflection, and that special something that hovers just above the light.

WHAT I LIKED

I enjoyed the word play; it deepened the expression of the poem and made me think of different angles of interpretation.

STRUCTURE

This is a cinquain poem. This a 5 line stanza poem. The lines are 2, 4. 6, 8 and 2 syllables.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. The poem is easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "light is dancing" -- light is electric, vibrant, and alive. Light gives life.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I loved the flow of the poem and the invitation to give light your own interpretation. Was it a lover basking in the light of lovemaking or simply the early morning twilight breaking out the positivity in one's soul? I enjoyed this poem very much!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM
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#4736536

Review of Spring

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: ASR

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

This poem deal with nature, specifically spring.

WHAT I LIKED

I enjoyed the visual and how it put me in the moment.

STRUCTURE

This is a haiku. A haiku is a short form of Japanese poetry, traditionally with 3 lines, and a 5,7,5 syllable pattern. The poem here matches traditional form.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. The poem is easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "A cardinal pair" - It was descriptive enough to picture two red birds on an early spring tree branch with green buds just popping out.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The haiku also had a challenge - not to use the letter "E." Very good job writing a visual without that letter! The haiku did a great job capturing the following elements; simplicity, directness of expression and intensity. Well done!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM
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#4736353

Review of Northwoods Summer

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

The poem is a relaxing camping experience during the summer at a lake.

WHAT I LIKED

I loved the progression of the story in the poem. A succinct use of words had me right there relaxing and enjoying all the day had to offer. A wonderful experience of the five senses.

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem. There were some stragetic rhymes, but no set patterns.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML. It makes the poem easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "Gliding across glass" when describing canoeing across the lake, but honestly, the poem is full of rich description.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The poem opens with an invitation for you to close your eyes and imagine. It comes full circle when it does the same at the end. Brilliant. The first invitation plants the hint of being transported to another time and place. The 2nd invitation leaves you longing to visit Northwoods. An enjoyable, heartwarming poem!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

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64

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#4735986

Review of Cupid Slam

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Cupid shoots the arrows, spreading the love.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: GOOD. Cupid is told to go away until next year.

Cupid is doing what cupid does.

STRUCTURE

This is a rythming poem with the 2nd and 4th lines rythming. The 1st and 3rd lines do not rythme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

There's not much of a slam. The poem has a nice flow to it. Worthy of a 4.5 Star.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

65

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#4735581

Review of Ode to Cupid

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

THE POEM

Cupid is a sweetie as he goes about looking for lovers.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: GOOD. Cupid is a jolly fellow with fluffy wings. He smiles and giggles and is a sweet cutie with rosy cheeks.

It's a pretty sweet, kindhearted description.

STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no apparent rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

No slam, here, just love little baby Eros. Worthy of a 4 star.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

66

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#4735334

Review of Thank You Anonymous

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

The poem was a heartfelt way to say "thank you" to Anonymous here on WDC.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked the tone of the poem. It was easy to read and it was heartwarming.

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem with 4 line stanzas and a ABAB rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "He comes through like a flasher, just giving me a peek."

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I love the unique graphic signature added at the end. It's a great way to leave an impression here on WDC. A very upbeat poem!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

67

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#4735333

Review of Oh Cupid My Cupid

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: ASR

| (2.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Blindfolded Cupid hit his target in an open field.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: GOOD. Well, Cupid is blindfolded.

Cupid's arrow is like a heart tipped missile.

STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

With an ode to Shakespeare, and a couple of thees and thines, the poem tells a story of a wayward arrow with a bad result. Bad poetry, but the slam is a little tame with a heart tipped missile.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

68

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#4735145

Review of Without Peer

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE LIMERICK

A warmhearted Limerick dedicated to the founding of Writing.com

WHAT I LIKED

A very lighthearted and sincere limerick.

STRUCTURE

A limerick is a 5 line poem with a AABBA rythme scheme with the 3rd & 4th lines shorter and sharing a different rythme. Most have a comedic spin.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

A really nice limerick that tells the tale of Writing.com. I would use this as an example in showing newer writers what a limerick is and the format.

Reviewed by StephB for the Angel Army.

Review Signature

69

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#4735134

Review of Cupid's the worst

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: E

| (1.5)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Cupid is kinda smelly when he goes into action.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: BAD. His best is like a fart that smells worse than the rest. It's descriptive but it's only 1 slam and doesn't quite raise to the level of Ugly.

STRUCTURE

This is a rythming poem that has an ABAB rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

While intentionally bad, the cupid slam comes off a bit tame. Worthy of a 1.5 star.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

70

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4735133

Review of Cupid Unleashed: Never a good mishmash.

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: 13+

| (1.5)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Cupid gets drunk with shooting off his arrows.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: BAD. Cupid put on women's clothing as he got dressed.

It's a slam, but could be more creative.

STRUCTURE

This is a rythming poem with an ABCBC rythme scheme.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

While intentionally bad, the cupid slam comes off a bit tame. Worthy of a 1.5 star.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

71

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4735125

Review of Love's Worst Marksman

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: 13+

| (1.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Cupid has a history of poor matchmaking hijinks.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: UGLY ENOUGH. Cupid has flimsy wings, tattered and fragil. A love guru he's not.

The poet gives plenty of reasons for Cupid to retire.

STRUCTURE

This is a rythming poem with an AABB rythme scheme. Each stanza has 4 lines.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The slams are ugly enough to be ugly, but I've seen uglier. Worthy of a 1 star review.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules.

72

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4734963

Review of The Curse of Cupid

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Bard's Hall Group

Rated: ASR

| (1.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

Thank you for entering the Bard's Hall Cupid Slam Contest for FEB 2024. Since this is a unique contest, here is what I'm looking for:

Must slam that beastly little arrow-flinger, CUPID!

Must be Poetry Only, any form or free verse -- doesn't matter so long as it's just plain AWFUL!

Line Count up to 60 or fewer. Place line count at the bottom of the poem.

This poetry entry MUST be written for this contest, February 2024! If it's a leftover slam from another time and place it will be disqualified.

Remember that "bad poetry" doesn't mean just misspellings. We are looking for the really creative kind of "bad" that makes us cringe and groan over its terribleness!

A ONE-STAR RATING is the ultimate goal, here. We will award the "best" one-starred poems as the winners.

And now... onto the review....

THE POEM

Cupid is back to do his yearly duty.

WHAT I LIKED/AKA CUPID SLAM aka GOOD, BAD, or UGLY:

SLAM: UGLY. He's a little creep with pudgy cheeks and wears wrinkled Huggies with tattered lace.

Great descriptions! Easy to visualize.

STRUCTURE

The first 3 lines of the stanza rythme with the 4th line rythming with every 4th line. Subtle, yet catchy.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

Well done ugly. Cupid's slams are visual and "ewww" worthy.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall FEB 2024 Contest. Line count was listed in accordance with the contest rules. A well earned 1 star!

73

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4732612

Review of MEMORIES

Review by StephBee - Hous...

Rated: E

| (4.5)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE MEMOIR

A dedication to a beloved pet.

WHAT I LIKED

A very heartfelt memoir that connects on an emotional level.

POV NARRATION/TENSE

This is told in the first person by an unnamed narrator. Good job with narration. Past tense is used appropriately.

THEME

For me, I picked out the theme of reflection. A beloved pet touched the author's heart and will be missed.

EMOTIONAL BEATS
How well does the emotional beat resonate with the reader? Great; Good; Okay.

The author drew a picture of how they've grown from sharing their life with their pet.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. I might suggest spacing between the paragraphs and using WDC ML to make it easier on the eyes to read.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

Suggestion as mentioned above. The writing is candid, honest, and sincere.

74

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4731736

Review of Sports, Music, or Both

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Steph Bee's Bee Hive

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE STORY

A young girl has a weighty decision to make between music and sports.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked the presentation. Good use of WDC ML to make the story easy to read and understand.

POV NARRATION/TENSE

This is told in the third person limited from Bionna's perspective. Good job with narration. Past tense is used appropriately.

DIALOGUE

There's a good blend of dialogue and narration. I would suggest an edit for dialogue tags. Use only "he said" or "she replied" in tags to identify the speaker only, if you have to. Put action in a separate sentence. Put the action first, then the dialogue.

FOR EXAMPLE, AS WRITTEN: "I know why you keep having these bad dreams," said Trionne as she look at her daughter.

MY SUGGESTION: Trionne looked at her daughter with a sympathetic smile. "I know why you keep having these bad dreams."

DESCRIPTIONS

There's enough to set the scenes, but this is something that could be expanded on. I know there's a word count, so I might suggest a strategic edit using a good economy of words and focusing on the five senses. How vivid was the dream? What does the power ball field smell like? What's her sense of touch after the accident?

SETTING

TIME: futuristic
PLACE: fantasy setting

This is something that is clarified for the reader.

CHARACTERS

Bionna

There's enough here to understand her motivations. She enjoys both music and sports and is torn about a career.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling mistakes. I might suggest a minor edit for punctuation. There's a run on sentence starting with the paragraph, "Several hours later..."

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

Suggestions as mentioned above. The opening engages the reader. This is a very creative and imaginative that the reader can empathize with as Bionna goes through her struggles.

75

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4731494

Review of Oh Tiny Little Flower

Review by StephBee - Hous...

In affiliation with Steph Bee's Bee Hive

Rated: E

| (5.0)

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

A poem about a flower, how it grows, and how it spreads love.

WHAT I LIKED

There was a nice rhythmic flow to the poem that made it easy to read.

STRUCTURE

This is free form poem with rythming couplets making up the stanzas.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "the windless summers warming heat shines on all your colors."

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I liked the title and thought it was reflective of the poem. I also liked the ending line where it reinforced the power of nature. A very expressive poem.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bee Hive

Bee Hive Graphic