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Review Requests: ON
1,230 Public Reviews Given
2,213 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I used a template for all of my reviews. I will comment on plot, characters, scene/setting, grammar, and anything else that comes to mind.
I'm good at...
short stories, novels, and blog
Favorite Genres
dark fantasy and horror However, I will read anything that is similar to a VC Andrews story. I also like any books about cooking.
Least Favorite Genres
romance, comedy, mystery, science fiction
Favorite Item Types
short stories, novels, blogs, anything about cooking
Least Favorite Item Types
poetry, campfires
I will not review...
Romance, action-adventure, mysteries/thiller, science fiction
Public Reviews
Previous ... 5 6 7 8 -9- 10 11 12 13 ... Next
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Review of I tremble  
Review by very thankful
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I'm reviewing you courtesy of The Angel Army, Helping Hearts, Showering Acts of Joy, and WDC Frontliners.

I've never read a haiku that was romantic too. The imagery is quite nice for a short poem. It absolutely took my breath away.

Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Black Magic  
Review by very thankful
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I'm reviewing you courtsey of The Angel Army, Showering Acts of Joy, and WDC Frontliners.

Good Halloween poem you've got here. I liked your use of allteriation. The flow and rhthym were just right. The imagery was great too.

Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Inner Scribbles  
Review by very thankful
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I'm reviewing you courtsey of The Angel Army, Helping Hearts, Showering Acts of Joy, and WDC Frontliners.

I really enjoyed reading your journal and learning more about you. Congrats on the weight loss. Keep up the good work.

Thanks for sharing this and write on.

Sister of Mercy

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Review of THE DARK  
Review by very thankful
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I'm reviewing you today courtsey of The Angel Army, Showering Acts of Joy, and WDC Frontliners.

I love the eerieness of this poem. The imagery is deligthfully frightening. I really loved the last stanza. It creates a lot of mystery.

Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Simply Put  
Review by very thankful
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
I'm reviewing this story on behalf of Angel Army and WDC Frontliners. You also gave me two helpful reviews.

Good Points
1. I like your use of isolationism in this story. One of my favorite authors, HP Lovecraft used this often in his stories.
2. You portray Jane's anxiety rather well.



Suggestions
1. Write out all numbers under one hundred.
2.The road was wet and the autumn leaves along the curb reminded her of the time when her mom drove over an oddly shaped branch buried in a freshly raked pile of leaves. A comma is needed after wet.
3. Jane’s timid, trembling eyes squeezed closed, closing out the world for the last time and she overheard the woman mumble under her breath, A comma is needed after time.
4. There were a few unneccessary adverbs. Go through and take those out. Adverbs tend to clutter writing.
5. Computer repair, craft shops, a service that converted vhs tapes to DVDs, everybody seemed to have their own business. vhs should be in all caps.



Sister of Mercy

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Review by very thankful
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I really liked this poem. I love wolves, and my dog is part wolf. While reading this poem, I could picture a wolf in the forest roaming about. The third and fourth stanzas have the best imagery, but I liked the meaning of the first stanza. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of A few  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I enjoyed reading your hakui and the senyru. I love reading these forms of poetry. The Old Dance Hall was my favorite. I could picture the images even though there were only a few words to go on. Christmas Toy surprised me because it started off with a usual Christmas Eve night as parents put toys together, but I wasn't expecting the end. I did like it though. Thanks for sharing and write on.

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Bleed  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I came across this in your port and was drawn to it. I use to be a mild cutter and know how it feels to be in this situation. The way you described this act was spot on because these are the thoughts that often ran through my head. I also liked the sig that went with this poem too. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Shroud  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I'm reviewing this as a part of your shower from Showering Acts of Joy. This poem brought back so many memories of my own that I've been working through and learning to just let them exist as bad memories too. I'm glad you've been able to do that. Thanks for sharing this and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a gorgeous web page! I simply love the faerie poems beside the picture of each faerie. I would have to say Friea is my favorite one even though it's the sad one. I also like how you began each line with the starting letter of each faerie's name. Thanks for sharing and keep writing!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of ENCHANTRESS  
Review by very thankful
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a beautiful poem! I love fantasy poetry, and the simple language of the poem is quite lovely. The flow is good too. The sigs you include with the poem make it stand out more. I would have to say that my favorite stanza was the third stanza because I believe that everyone is looking for someone to take away the pain no matter what it is. Good job with this one!

Sister of Mercy

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Review by very thankful
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
This story has peaked my interest. I want to know what happens next. You ended it with a cliffhanger. I have a few suggestions. First, you need to go back through and edit for punctuation, mainly commas. Second, drop all adverbs since those are a sign of telling, and they tend to clutter up writing. Third, use another word for look. The word look clutters up writing too and is telling. Last, you have parts that are rather telling that could be made to show if you just reworded them to the character's thoughts by putting them in italics. I hope this helps! Keep on working on this. Write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review of Macabre Dance  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I am reviewing this poem on behalf of WDC Frontliners. I love this poem of the macabre. It reminds me of HP Lovecraft for some reason. Your use of imagery is perfect in this work. It makes me think of ritual dances on older horror movies too. I simply love this poem! Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy
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Review of Tree Rings  
Review by very thankful
Rated: E | (4.0)
Congrats on being a WDC Frontliner Reviewer of the month! I like the format of this poem. The imagery you use is quite breathtaking. I like the last stanza the best because of the meaning and the beat it seems to have. Thanks for sharing this and write on!

Sister of Mercy
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Review of Perfection  
Review by very thankful
Rated: E | (4.5)
I saw your poem at Frontliners as an entry for poem of the week and thought I would check it out. I could really relate to this poem, and I believe others can too. I do have one suggestion. A comma is needed in the second stanza, second line after polished. I could picture a home out of Better Homes and Gardens while reading this poem. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review by very thankful
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
Here is another review as promised from your auction winnings. I hope this review helps!

Good News
1.I loved the concept.
2. I loved the ghost.

Suggestions
1. You used look/looked twice in the third paragraph. Try watch in the second sentence.
2. You use pain twice in the fourth paragraph try another word pain.
3. A comma is needed before a coordinating conjunction if both sides can stand alone as sentences.
4. Do not start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction.
5. I'll look into......this is repeated twice in a sentence. You need a different phrase. Try using another word for look.
6. Do not start a sentence with then.
7. This story reads like a script in a way. Did you intend for that?
8. It was too short. It needed more!

Sister of Mercy

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#1491907 by Not Available.


"Invalid Item" 
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Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I am showering you with this review on behalf of Showering Acts of Joy Forum. I loved your in and out. It was fun to read other members taste in music. I even saw another Johnny Cash fan on the board too. Thanks for sharing this and write on!

Sister of Mercy

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Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Thank you for stopping by the Fantasy and Horror Review Forum. It was my pleasure to review your story.

Good News
1. I enjoyed the creativity of your world.
2. I really liked Tarah.
3. Your descriptions were great.

Suggestions
1. Do not start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction.
2. Drop the adverbs. They are telling.
3. A comma is not needed before a coordinating conjunction if both sides cannot stand alone as sentences.
4. Drop some of the dialogue tags. Just show the action instead.
5. Try not to use then. It interupts the flow of a sentence.
6. Try not to use felt. This is vague.
7. Do not start a sentence with there was/were. This makes a sentence read weak.


Sister of Mercy

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Review of Fire to Ashes  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Here is the third review for the package you won in my last auction. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to review your work.

Good News
1. I loved your description of the setting.
2. I liked the mysterious tone of your story.


Suggestions
1. A comma is needed before a coordinating conjunction if both sides can stand alone as sentences.
2. If it is established who is speaking, the dialogue tags are unneccessary. Just show the action.
3. Do not start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction.
4. Try not to repeat the same word in a sentence. It interupts the flow of the story.
5. Drop the adverbs. They are telling.
6. I would have liked a little more. The story seemed to end too quickly.


Sister of Mercy
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Review of Chapters1-8  
Review by very thankful
Rated: E | (4.0)
Here is another review from the Fantasy review package you won in my auction. I hope this review helps.

Good News
1. You are very good with descriptions.
2. I liked your main character.
3. This story kind of reminded me of the old tv show "Land of the Lost" for some reason.

Suggestions
1. Try not to repeat the same word in a sentence.
2. A comma is needed before a coordinating conjunction if both sides can stand alone as sentences.
3. Try not to use adverbs. They are telling.
4. Watch for beginning sentences with they was/were. These combinations make a sentence read weak.
5. Do not start a sentence with then.
6. Do not start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction.
7. Use another word for looked.


Sister of Mercy
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Review of See this Woman  
Review by very thankful
Rated: E | (4.0)
Here I am again to give you another review on behalf of the Showering Acts of Joy Forum. I could really relate to this poem. In someways, I thought you were talking about me. I would love to see my byline on a book too, among other things. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy
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Review of SIR TOM THUMBE  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Here is the first of the reviews you won in my auction. I hope this review helps!

Good News
1. This is a delightful story. I really enjoyed reading it.


Suggestions
1. "Queenie is some head nurse, and a climbsy one to boot." Remove the comma.
2. Remove all adverbs, they are telling instead of showing.
3. Do not start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction.

Sister of Mercy
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Review of Chitter  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Trick or Treat! Thank you for entering the Sister of Mercy's Horror Chapter contest. This was a good start to a novel. I liked the way you described the scenery and how you portrayed your characters. The ending makes me want to read more. The only thing I would suggest is to go back and edit for a few comma errors. Thanks for entering and good luck.

Sister of Mercy
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Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Trick or Treat! Here I am one last time to review an item from your port on behalf of Showering Acts of Joy, Angel Army, and WDC Frontliners. I found this story so delightful. I love stories about leprechauns and other faerie tales. You told this story perfectly. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy
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Review of DEAR DIARY  
Review by very thankful
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Trick or Treat! I am here again to browse your port and give you a review on behalf of Showering Acts of Joy, Angel Army, and WDC Frontliners. This was a great tale to read on Halloween. It would make a pretty decent script too if you were to expand the story and change the format. Thanks for sharing and write on!

Sister of Mercy
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