Sparky's (sparkyvacdr) Reviews

Review Requests: OFF
161 Public Reviews Given
177 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I like to encourage writers, while giving accurate, insightful, truthful feedback. Reviews for novel length items will be an overview and general comment. I don't review line by line or focus on grammar, spelling or punctuation -except perhaps if I see something affecting the storyline, or if I have suggestions relating to improving relevant areas of the work.
I'm good at...
I find it easy to give positive comments, and encouragement, but I struggle to be critical.
Favorite Genres
Thriller, Horror, Mystery
Least Favorite Genres
Gothic. Historical. Satanism. Overly violent. Nope, get someone else for that stuff.
Favorite Item Types
Mainstream fiction
Least Favorite Item Types
Stories that lack conflict, drama, purpose.
I will not review...
Stuff written while obviously high on drugs :) OK yes I will review that too..
Public Reviews
51
51

Review of Earth: Lost  

Review by sparkyvacdrMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I have enjoyed your story and the journal style of it.
You have kept good consistency and plausability with the dates and time lapses between them. You could describe your surroundings, people and their characteristics a little more, and perhaps have some conversations recorded in there.
But whist being short simplified journal entries, it still contains enough information to form a picture of a lost earth, returning group of people and their horrific discovery of the lost Earth. Character empathy is built but could be improved on, for example with his grief at losing Max. But I'm reminded, it IS a journal, not a letter home to his mother or a personal diary, so you have probably found the right balance there. If you did intend it to be his personal diary, then you could build this into a lengthy story.
A couple of suggestions of things I have learned the hard way. Get rid of the word "actually". Try not to ever use it. Describe the irony a different way.
Something else I've been able to improve on, reread it again as a complete work and then simplify stuff that is repeated or you have tried to hard to describe or explain. This happens to me often in my writing.
What I'm referring to is a "feel" in the story. It's an atmosphere that builds as you read it. And if there is an extra description of something you have just read, it takes away from the story, makes the reader feel like a dummy, and as a writer you probably didn't even notice or intend it to come across that way.
I can see you will grow the more you write. It's there in this story.
Sparkyvacdr
53
53

Review of What is writing  

Review by sparkyvacdrMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello!

This is an example of why I like reading material from new writers. The originality, honesty and a keen sense of joy, yes pleasure in writing!
You can't help it Christi52 can you? You put across to me, communicate with me; some anonymous reader who really probably hasn't a clue how to review properly, but I know writing that has cost someone something to write it. That investment, that letting go of inner self and transferring it to thoughts, words, printing.

In a short few sentences you have described what writing entails and revealed the freedom. Because all your questions are answered at the end where you mention joy!

I get it! Oh yes, I get it all right...

It's joy because all writers are FREE.

FREEDOM!!!!!

sparkyvacdr


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
54
54

Review of If I didn't have to balance  

Review by sparkyvacdrMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Yes of course it's a winner! :)

Thought provoking and well written. No repetition and original descriptions. I like it!

The flow of it seems to pick up the pace until at the end it's like a game of basket ball, dodging here dodging there and a rhythm of words bouncing and finding a gap in the defence of my mind until at the end it sails over my head (not just figuratively speaking! :) ) and pops through the net scoring a goal of one positive review for you! And a need to re read it and re read it for me, because it' has stimulated my thinking.

Mission accomplished yeah?

Sparkyvacdr
55
55

Review of Trial  

Review by sparkyvacdrMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I have never read any of your work, elizjohn.
But after reading this there is a much greater chance that I will! :)
Cat's have always scared me because contrary to what some people think, nobody owns cats. They own people. You cannot tell a cat what to do. It's that simple.
They only do stuff when and if it suits them and is in their interests.
You have not mentioned cats here except the meow noise and licking black fur but I can imagine the alien group of talking felines.

Well done. It's well written and enjoyable, and in just a few words you have stimulated my thoughts.
Sparkyvacdr.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
56
56

Review of Is the Semicolon Worth Saving?  

Review by sparkyvacdrMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I'm a relatively new user of writing.com in spite of being a member for some years.
Recently I returned to this site after making serious headway with a novel, and along with it a poem that I submitted; the inspiration from this simple act seems to be self feeding, snowballing cyclone or hurricane-like.

So when I saw the heading for this small part of your helpful article, I was keen to see your information and views, and now others; the semicolon is still as important in literature these days (88.4% of current users opinion according to this poll) as a colonoscopy is in medical diagnosis. (Just a random fact http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colonoscopy)

Any correction here of my use of said semicolon would be great as like others, I'm confused with its correct placement too.

Now I have a question in reverse for you.

Referring to fiction writing; Why is it considered basically SINFUL to use wikipedia as a source of information and to state that fact? (I'm told this is so by our three teenagers)