|Hi Redtowrite !
Thanks for your entry in my contest, "Spidey's Weekly Poetry Contest" [ASR]
This is my review for your entry, "I Listen for Words no Longer Heard" [E]
Ah, writer's block! One to which most of us, sadly, can relate. I think you've done very well here to describe the feeling, and I like that there's also a story behind it, too. Nicely done!
Impressive imagery! I particularly loved this line:
a festival of metaphors
Each stanza of the poem contained great imagery which made the poem a joy to read!
No strict form that I could see. Most of your stanzas contain five lines (with the first containing six). For me, unrhyming lines worked well here, focusing my attention on the great imagery instead of following a strict rhythm. (I sometimes find rhythms distracting, so I think it was a wise choice for this poem)
I could feel a definite, personal tone here. The speaker is describing the emotions that are connected with writer's block in a personal way, but I think in a way, too, that makes it easy for the reader to identify with the speaker and the issue at hand.
The poem flows very well, due, I think, to your choice of free or blank verse. For me, it focused my attention on the words themselves and the images they conveyed. Good choice!
(These are suggestions with regard to my understanding of grammar/spelling rules. If I'm mistaken or missing a regional difference in usage, I apologize in advance.)
travel tear filled pulsing veins
I think "tear filled" should be tear-filled
Great title and intro! They definitely caught my eye and made me want to read the poem.
Your ratings and genres are also very well-chosen.
These are just suggestions. Feel free to use them or not.
I had a difficult time figuring out exactly what happens in this story. The speaker was once prolific in his/her writing, then someone enters their life, and that causes writer's block? I wasn't sure what happened between the two to cause the writer's block. This may just be my oversight, but I got a little confused at the end of the poem. Perhaps you could make it clearer? Just my thoughts.
I had an issue with your use of "you" in the poem. Let me explain. In stanza 4, you have these lines:
Short stories came to life
with characters you'd want to meet.
I took this as the 'universal' you, basically, 'characters anyone would want to meet.'
But then in the next stanza, you start with:
Then you walked into my life,
I took this 'you' as a specific person, the object of the poem, the person the speaker (the 'I' person) is speaking to. That made me wonder if the first 'you' was referring to the same person. Do you see what I mean? I think having these two different (or perhaps the same) 'you's so close together might cause some confusion. You may want to take another look at that part and decide for yourself.
4.0 - An excellent poem about writer's block! I love how you made it a personal story about one person, but also a poem with which many can relate. Thanks so much for sharing your work!
Winners will be announced soon. Best of luck, and thank you for your entry!