|Thank you I am now in tears. This is an awesome piece.
Um so favorite parts ALL OF IT! Ok ok no in all honesty my favorite parts are their past. I totally love it. Their story is very down to earth and realistic and I like that.
I'm not sure why but the story didn't catch my attention right away, but thinking about it most good books start like that so I wouldn't worry about it.
I officially want to know everything about their past together! Would you write more if you haven't already please!
I know you only asked for how I liked it and what I liked best but as I was reading a few parts caught my attention. Don't be devastated over what looks like a lot it isn't very much and most is just suggestions. I am trying to be very thorough because I have enjoyed it sooo much. (so I've taken care to look over all of this more than once). My suggestions are in red what you had already is in navy/blue.
I’m usually the logical one, I’m usually the one that knows the answer, but I don’t know the answer this time, and "but" this is new territory for me.
It’s been two months since your tragic and unexpected end and "but" the pain is still as fresh as the day I found out.
You’d "have" lean "leaned" forward with me and stare "stared" at me, fascinated and patiently waiting to hang onto every word I say.
I found in the dictionary Blonde means: a woman or girl having this coloration.
Blond means: a blond person.
I was always afraid that you’d drown, but my fears never came true, because your blonde "blond" hair always stood out, so I never lost you.
You looked behind "over" your shoulder and gave me that warm smile that always sent lightning bolts down my spine.
The sand was white like the snow and the sun glimmered off the water making "it" look like it was waiting for me.
Sweetheart, I know a lot about you. I know you love little spots like these, not only so we can be alone, but so that you can have a place where you "can" think and dream.
I missed my favorite girl. In my opinion since he has always called her sweetheart and Phoenix has never had a nickname for him I believe he should say "I've missed you sweetheart" and she should only say "I've missed you too" or "I've missed you too, Luca."
Your light was way too bright, it can’t "couldn't" be burned out. or Your light was way too bright to be burned out.
That was your voice calling my name. I believe it would flow better if you say. It was your voice calling my name
I didn’t need to say "the" words: you knew I was letting you go.
Again these are only suggestions so use what you will and discard what you don't want. Again amazing! Wonderful job! Keep writing!
I have made an exception to my star rating as there's a few things needing fixing but this piece was so good I couldn't rate it lower and will definitely be coming back to read it again even with these minor errors.
Now if this turns into a novel tell me and you might be joining my list of all time favorite authors.
Keep up your amazing writing,