After reading this, I desperately wanted to sit at your Grandma's table to eat breakfast biscuits covered in melted butter and peach marmalade.
Your last paragraph made this an endearing circle of life story told in a unique way.
Substituting the word smell with aroma, scent, perfume, and fragrance would alleviate the overuse of the word smell. Unless of course, this was your intent, and then I apologize for not recognizing your approach.
Recently, after reading a book entitled “The Moves Writer’s Make by James C. Raymond, I’ve gotten into reading essays. For me, essays are like photographs, providing glimpses into the lives of those pictured. However, essays offer a more profound hint into the insights of the author’s being, even if the opinion of the essays holds the exact opposite of the one held by the writer.
Your "Stuff" was especially intriguing since I am presently ‘trying’ to keep my marriage together. (I did go as far as viewing apartments for rent). I too, took inventory of my ‘stuff’ and pondered many of the same questions you did.
My only suggestion for your essay is to eliminate the overuse of the word ‘that’ I have provide a few examples:
That would be a shame. . . . =What a shame.
All that visual stimuli = All that visual stimuli
Can it be that in a bid for sentimentality and meaning in our lives, we try to inject significance in objects and events that actually were . . . not that special?
=Can it be through a bid……which were actually….not very special?
I look forward to reading the rest of your material in your "the divorce essays" as well as your port…
A very endearing tale of the demonstration of love, caring and sharing. Since the Wiz traveled far and wide, maybe you could add a sentence or too how how difficult his journey was, thus underscoring his determination and love for the Boy.
Brilliant! Your delivery--from a 6th grader writing an essay--was perfect. I love the way he rambles on. His ideas about what it might be like to do something he's never done before are on target and age-appropriate.
I was wondering...in your sixth paragraph, you have an 's' after the word good (with all kinds of goods things for good little children.).
Brilliant! Your delivery--from a 6th grader writing an essay--was perfect. I love the way he rambles on. His ideas about what it might be like to do something he's never done before are on target and age-appropriate.
I was wondering...in your sixth paragraph, you have an 's' after the word good (with all kinds of goods things for good little children.).
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