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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/warpedsanity
Review Requests: OFF
1,171 Public Reviews Given
Review Style
I try to give reviews the way I prefer to receive them. Honesty, thoughts for improvement, and identifying strengths are aspects that I prefer from others, so I give these things in return. Rising star award
I'm good at...
I can pretty much review anything, whether poetry or short stories. My favorite genres to read are horror and the odder side of fiction, but I am open to reading other genres. If I do review a genre that is not one I particularly enjoy reading, then I am most likely going to review it based on the structure, rather than the content.
Favorite Genres
I tend to gravitate toward writings in the dark genres. With short stories and novels, horror is my favorite. With poetry, I prefer writings that display raw emotions. If your writing tackles a subject that people find offensive, I might like it.
Least Favorite Genres
Christian literature, Western, and Children's. I will NOT read or review anything that consists of XGC material between minors and adults or encourages abuse as acceptable behaviors.
Favorite Item Types
Dark poetry, horror, emotional, autobiographical, erotica, psychology
Least Favorite Item Types
Horror is one of my favorites to read and write. Also, poetry that tackles intense subject matter interests me.
I will not review...
I WILL NOT review anything that encourages abuse as acceptable behavior or includes XGC material between a minor and adult. All review requests asking me to read whole novels or later chapters will be rejected. The reason being is that I can not give a fair review of chapter 3 when I have not read the chapters before that and, the time allowance when requests for reviews are made does not allow for enough time to read a whole novel.
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Distorted Minds Contest. Thank you for submitting your story to the contest!

Title and intro
I loved the title and description of this one! It was intriguing without giving up the plot. Nice play on words in the description.

What I liked
At first when I began reading this, I thought it was going to be an adultish version of the littles. The descriptions of their living space further made me think so. Then I found out this boy was the child of one of these giants. I'm assuming the mom was a giant, since she is married to the brute giant. This would mean the little people more so resemble those with dwarfism. Either way, the concept of these hidden people in the walls and secret alleys was very creative.

There's some great dimensional characters here too. I like how you added some cultural things, like how the shop keeper speaks as if English is obviously not his first language.

The prompt was used in an interesting way, without being cliché, which made for a more entertaining read.


Suggestions
It was obvious you spent a lot of time on this story because of how defined the characters are. Though I felt there was something amiss. These little people are not supposed to be seen by the giants, but they are sent out to pick pocket them. If they were little people as in those tiny people in The Little's books, this would make sense. People aren't looking for itty bitty people and they could easily not be seen by the full size humans. With them being the size of children there would be no way for them not to be visible to the larger people.

Due to that, I thought your wording about the little people not being seen might have actually meant not getting caught. Then the little Asian friend meets his little person friend and we find out you actually did mean they were not supposed to be seen.


Thank you for contributing your story to the contest! Hopefully you will continue to share your creativity in the contest. *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
for entry "The Visionary
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Distorted Minds Contest. Thank you for submitting your story to the contest!

The Title
The title grabs the reader, whether they are wanting to read something in the horror genre or a feel good type of story. It tells the reader we are going to read something about someone extraordinary.

What I liked
You created a character driven story without the slow burn which sometimes happens. Right away we learn what is extraordinary about this man and I kept reading, knowing he was going to play an important roll in something significant.

I loved how the main characters came alive in this, everything from the man with the visions to the nurse. I could feel the nurses anguish towards the end.


Suggestions

I don't really have any suggestions for improvement. Great story.



Thank you for submitting your story. Hopefully you'll continue to share your writing in the contest. *Heart*
3
3
Review of It’s not real  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Distorted Minds Contest. Thank you for submitting your story to the contest!

Title and intro
The title is catchy and the description is written in a way to create interest in reading without giving away the plot.

What I liked
The concept was good. It was as if she was supposed to go where her parents were. It was just delayed.


Suggestions
There's a lot of head bopping going on in the story. First we are in Sandra's head, then we switch to Cass' head, then Sandra's again and so on. There is also some missing information in the story. Did Cassie intentionally take the drugs or were they slipped to her? Early on she says "stupid drugs" which would imply she would not take them intentionally, but then again, humans do sometimes do self-harming things when dealing with grief, especially when for some reason there isn't any real closure.

Thanks for submitting your writing to the contest! Hopefully you will continue to submit your writing in the future. *Heart*
4
4
Review of Be Brave  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Distorted Minds Contest. Thank you for submitting your story to the contest!

Title and description
The title is perfect to the item. Though, I'd suggest writing a description which would intrigue potential readers. You could always add an authors note at the bottom of your story. As far as the word count. I'm not really picky. You could even only add that in your post when you submit your item.

What I liked
I was excited to see someone tackle this prompt. In my mind I saw all sorts of ways people could go with this prompt, but I knew it was a challenging one. The poetic prose was a smart way to go with this. It is fitting.

Your use of anaphora with the repeated phrase "we dance the dance" works well with intensifying the emotive content of the writing. The end was especially written well. I imagined a Native American, grinning as he/she said it for some reason.

Suggestions
There is a few places in the story poem where you reverse the subject and predicate. At first I thought maybe you were doing what Stephen Graham Jones does in his books. He writes the way those on the reservations speak with slang and all. Though, I don't think people on reservations commonly reverse the subject and predicate. There are also some run on sentences. Below are a few examples of what I mean.

In the heat of renewing flame your faces they will melt.- Reversed subject and predicate

They'll beat in heads and stab through the hearts of the young no suffering will they feel- Run-on sentence and reversed subject and predicate on the second sentence.

For centuries did they wait.- This reads as a question, instead of a statement. Seems "for centuries they waited" would be more fitting.

Overall, this is a great poetic prose, fitting to the prompt, and fitting to the contest. Thanks for sharing your writing. Hopefully you will submit a story again in the future. *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Rebel Poetry Contest. Thank you for submitting your poetry to the contest!

Imagery
The imagery is presented in a matter of fact way through the perception of someone who is viewing what is going on in their country and seeing the division among the people. The topic is definitely relevant today and to the prompt.

Emotive qualities
The emotions of being frustrated with the separation caused by media and hate speech was apparent throughout. I'm sure there are a lot of people who would relate, no matter what political spectrum they categorize themselves as.

Flow
There are some unneeded lines and words in the poem. I liked the last two lines of the first stanza. It sets the pace for the rest of the poem, though it would read smoother if the 'the' was removed before 'twiterverse'. Also, I'm thinking there should be another t in to make it twitterverse, because the social media site is titled Twitter, not Twiter.

In the third stanza you reference "words of hatred" and then again "words of hate". Mentioning it twice is redundant. You only need one to make your point.


Thank you for submitting your poetry to the contest! It is always wonderful seeing new faces enter. Hopefully you will submit your poetry again. *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
6
6
Review of Inner Enemy  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Rebel Poetry Contest. Thank you for submitting your poetry to the contest!

Imagery
Do to the title and description we are introduced to the concept the poem is about the inner self. So, when I read the poem I am reading it as if it were an inner voice of degradation, pointing the finger at the self as being to fault for all. Then the first stanza sets the pace for your inner voice, letting us know there is a dark cloud around you.

I was a little confused by the last stanza because of the "you don't understand". If this is an internal voice, hence you, then you obviously know you are at fault or at least feel you are, so it seems as if you have switched to actually talking to another person who you feel is at fault for whatever pain you are feeling.

Emotive qualities
The language is matter-of fact, which tells the reader exactly what you are thinking. Outside of the initial stanza, there isn't any metaphor. Some other metaphor or simile would have heightened the emotiveness of the poem.


Flow
The poem flows smooth without anything to trip over.

Thanks for submitting your writing to the contest. Hopefully you will continue to submit your poetry. It is always wonderful seeing new faces. *Heart*




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
7
7
for entry "Dance'n Alone
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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I'm reviewing this because you submitted it to the July/August 2021 round in "Rebel Poetry Contest. Thank you for submitting your poetry to the contest!

Imagery
The imagery is of someone escaping reality through drugs (I suspect that is what the smoking was referring to) and alcohol. The result is they end up alone in the long run, which is typically the result of such a life.

Emotive qualities
There was a sadness to this. When reading it I thought of when I was a bartender, seeing the games of those I was serving as they attempted to impress others. There is a lot of loneliness in that scene.

Flow
The rhythm of the poem is fast paced, until towards the end when you begin a line with "or", which caused me to slow down with the line. Not sure if it was your intention to do so, but it works in the poem.

This was fitting to the contest and the chosen prompt, and I enjoyed the read. Thanks for your submission to the contest. *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
Review by warpedsanity
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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This piqued my interest because I am a survivor of multiple types of abuse. That being said, unlike your claim of being accused of victim blaming, I didn't feel as such. It was written from the point of view of someone who is holding himself accountable for his own mistakes, but realizing the whole picture, rather than just a fragment.

Maybe I didn't see it as victim blaming because, after choosing the same qualities in men, I realized I needed to take a hard look at myself and why I made the choices I did. Only then, could I learn to make better choices.

Though, I would like to say, men are not the only abusers. They are just the ones who stand out. Some behaviors in men which are deemed abuse, seem to be acceptable by society by women. My step-father, who raised me when I was in my early elementary years, actually divorced my mother due to her inflicting emotional and physical abuse. It does happen. People just don't talk about it as much. Or, rather abused men are less vocal about it than women are. The same with childhood abuse, especially if it is sexual. I suspect more males are sexually abused more as children than statistics say. The reason being, they are less likely to speak up, which makes them more of a target.

I believe trauma is the leading cause of one being an abuser in their adult life. Maybe I'm wrong, but it makes sense to me. Every abuser I've encountered has had some sort of trauma.


I suppose this is more of a response than a review. Since it was an opinion piece on a touchy subject, it seemed to beg more for a response from me.

9
9
Review of The Arrival  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest.

What I Liked
I loved this feministic tale of the biblical flood. Since this apparently happened all over the world, I thought of this as maybe another ark distant from the biblical one, with a different sent of customs and beliefs.

There was some good imagery here as well. For example how you described the lioness appearing.

Thoughts on improvement
I didn't really see anything you needed to improve. The story was interesting and I enjoyed the read.

Thanks for sharing your creativity with us. *Smile*
10
10
Review of Robot Riders  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!

What I Liked
I thought you did exceptionally well on the dialogue. I could easy tell who was speaking and feel the personalities of the speakers. The story itself was creative and unique.

Thoughts on improvement
For the first half of the story I felt more like I was reading a script, rather than a short story, mostly because you tell us a description, then present dialogue, rather than throwing the dialogue in with the descriptions of what is going on.

Overall, I enjoyed the story. It was a good read. Thanks for sharing your creativity with us.
11
11
Review of The Job  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!

What I Liked
The concept in the story was interesting and I thought the moral dilemma was a nice touch to the story. The moral here seems to be that for every action there is a consequence.

Your dialogue was easy to follow. Plus you added plenty of action and body language with the dialogue so that I could clearly see these characters as they spoke.

Thoughts on improvement\
should he did find himself being pursued. You appear to have an extra word here.

Another set of lights was (were)looming



Overall, despite the few mistakes I found, this was a well written story. thank you for sharing your creativity with me.
12
12
Review of The Dawn Riders  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!

What I liked
I felt a lot of the character descriptions were executed well. The action sequences were written well too. With the girlfriend's gut feelings, I figured the outcome would be the demise of the main character, so the ending was unexpected, which is good.

As a member of the audience, reading this, it seems that there was a lesson here. He had survived an accident before in another race and the fatality in this one could have been him.

Thoughts on correction

This is probably just personal preference, but I'm not a big fan of long flashbacks in short stories. I believe it works well in novels, but is distracting in short stories. Though, I see the purpose and relevance to the story.

Thank you for sharing your imagination with WDC. I enjoyed reading your story.




13
13
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!


This imagined future was a unique post apocalyptic tale. So, A+ on originality. The descriptions of the alien race were especially interesting as well. Great details there.

The dialogue and character development was executed well too. There is plenty of body language to go along with the dialogue which helps us see these characters. They are likable and as a reader, I found myself hoping for their survival.

Thanks for sharing your imagination with us. I've enjoyed the read.




14
14
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest.

What I Liked
These characters came alive for me. I saw the main character a bit more nerdy looking in comparison to this Chavez guy. By his reactions, I got the feeling he wasn't used to getting the pretty girls, which made him more gullible.

Thoughts on improvement
I did guess there was going to be some trickery going on and that he'd be left broke and/or holding the bag and I was correct. So, it would have been nice to be a little more surprised in the outcome. Other than that I couldn't find any issues with the story.


This was a well-written piece with great character details. Thanks for sharing your writing with us. *Smile*
15
15
Review of LA Race  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!

What I Liked
I thought the relationship between the siblings was endearing. Them uniting seemed to only be part of the story though. The main character seemed to cope with her new handicap from the accident by avoiding her sister who she once was able to ride bikes with. In the end they find a way they can still do that, which is sweet.

Thoughts on improvement

Finally, she her(heard) the front door open and shut, a bit forcefully.. It appears you forgot a few letters in the word there.

I wasn't really clear on what the accident was. I sort of assumed it was a bike accident, but it was never clarified in the story. Also, she is moody, probably because she is in pain, yet it almost seems a bit dramatic because her sister says something about her back being broken. Yet, she is on crutches. It seems she would be in a wheelchair if her back was broken.

Thanks for sharing your creativity. I enjoyed reading your story. Good luck in the contest. *Heart*

16
16
Review of Call of the Gulf  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)

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I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering!

What I Liked
The futuristic texting was an interesting aspect. Apparently his friend did not have the same technology, hence why his texts used things like "U" instead of you.

A lot of the character development shown through the dialogue is good. I got the impression these were young men, either teen or early twenties.

Thoughts on improvement

The turning to dolphins thing didn't really do it for me. Not quite seeing the reasoning why the sand would turn them into dolphins. Maybe you could add something to rationalize that.


Thanks for sharing your imagination with me. Good luck with the contest.
17
17
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)

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Hi,Beholden ! I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest.


What I liked
These two hermits were interesting characters and the pessimistic hermit does make a good protagonist. Plus, I liked the comical revelation at the end. Honestly, I was thinking the experience conflicted with their beliefs, especially with all the conversing with people along the way and the convention, where there would be a lot of people.

Suggestions
The story was wonderful and easy to read, without a bunch of issues to trip over, but it seemed very predictable to me. Even that being the case, I do like that the weakest of the two seemed to be the smartest. *Bigsmile*

Final thoughts
Overall, this was a fun read. I really liked these characters and the premise of the story.

Thank for sharing your writing. Hopefully, you will continue to submit your writing to future contests. *Heart*
18
18
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)

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Hi,PureSciFi ! I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest.


What I liked
I thought that the concepts within the plot were interesting and unique. It is definitely an imaginative story for sure. Also, you adhered to the prompt. Your villain was made likable. Even though he did so for his own selfish means, his actions were for the greater good.

Suggestions
I tripped quite a bit in areas because you switch from present tense to past tense constantly throughout the whole story. Also, there are some sentence structure issues, where you use sentence fragments.

Final thoughts
This was an interesting science fiction story. I just felt that it needs some editing.

Thank you for sharing your writing. Hopefully, you will continue to submit your writing to future contests. *Heart*
19
19
Review of Deadline  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (3.0)

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Hi,Angelica- Changing Colors Fall ! I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest.

What I liked
I thought you did a great job adhering to the prompt. Obviously this character is not the greatest person because they were creating potions that are harmful to humans. Yet, they are likable because they end up using the potions for just means.

Suggestions
I felt there were some issues in the execution of the story. The intro is a bit wordy with a lot of telling, and some grammar issues. Plus, there are some run-on sentences, sentence fragments, and comma issues. You would benefit from using a free grammar program like Grammarly, which would catch a lot of these issues for you.

Final Thoughts
I thought the storyline was good and it adhered to the prompt. I just think it needs more editing.

Thank you for sharing your writing. Hopefully you will continue to submit to the contest. *Heart*
20
20
Review of Jake  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hi,Lovina 🐕‍🦺 ! I'm here to review this as one of the judges for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest.


What I liked
I thought you did well creating sympathy for Jake. Even though his lack of stopping the crimes makes him a villian by association, one can't help but understand his reasonings. That and he Jake seems to have some morals because he understands what the others are doing is evil and is disturbed by it.


Suggestions for Improvement
You added a little slang to show that this was the old west, but I don't think it worked well enough. Adding more slang would have worked better, especially in the dialogue.

You might benefit from a good grammar editor, like Grammarly. There are multiple comma errors in the writing.

Final Thoughts
Overall, I thought this was an interesting read. I just thought it needed a bit more editing.

Thank you so much for submitting your writing. Hopefully, you will continue to contribute to the contest. *Heart*
21
21
Review of mGur on Spirit  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Oh, what a lovely little poem! With so few word allowance, you have express such deep meaning.

I believe most could identify with these words, to at least a small degree. We all at one time or another have held back that free-spirited part of ourselves for a multitude of reasons.

That last line was a perfect way to summarize the verse. It expands on the spirit, showing us that you are referring to love. At least that is how I understood it. But, like most poetry, the reader interprets upon their own experience and knowledge of the world, a lot of times. So, for me, I understood it as the writer holds back their heart.

Structurally, as far as my analysis, the poem follows the format of the form perfectly. Grammatically, it is well executed and flows beautifully.

Excellent job and good luck in the contest! *Heart*

22
22
Review of Dragon Poem  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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It is so awesome that you are motivated and doing so many of the extras within Rising Stars! You've put a lot into these pieces too and should be proud of yourself for the effort you have put forth.


First thoughts

My first thoughts after reading this the first time are that this was a cute idea. It would make for a great children's story, with pictures and such. I don't think there is a story published story about a dragon that meows yet. *Bigsmile*

Imagery
The imagery is fun and lively. I could clearly see this big, pretty blue dragon, who might seem fierce, that is until it lets out a meow, rather than a large beastly sound.

Flow
The poem flows well due to rhyme. You use some less cliche rhymes like "various" and "nefarious", too.

The only thing that threw me off a bit with the flow is that in a few places you switch the subject and predicate. For example, "Pets their owners do resemble". If the subject and predicate were not reversed it would read, "Pets do resemble their owners." Often times when the subject and predicate is reversed like that it feels forced, rather than smooth.

Mechanics
I didn't find any grammar or spelling issues, so excellent job on the editing.

Final thoughts
This was an adorable idea. I love the concept and could totally see you expanding on this dragon named Cat into a larger children's series.

Thank you for sharing! And, good luck in the contest! *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
23
23
Review of By Any Other Name  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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I ran across this while browsing the random read and reviews. To my surprise, it is also in your Rising Star folder. Apparently, you have only just written it today as one of the challenges. WdC was awfully quick with putting it in the random reviews!

The hook
Right away we are taken to one of the main dilemmas in the story, her insecurity with her given name. We all have known that one kid in school where we think, what were their parents thinking when they named them that. Kids will find anything to tease others about, why make things worse with targeting them with a horrid birth name.

This made for a good hook, especially since it added to the conclusion, where she contemplates the sound of her possible future name.

Dialogue
The dialogue was executed well, showing these characters well. Thoughts in italics, which makes them stand out hearing the words in our own heads, much like the character would.

Character Development
I liked Ruby. She is easy to relate to because, like her, most of us have some aspect in our childhood we'd like to run away from. She seems to be a bit of a romantic because she already considers how her name would sound if she marries a man she only recently met, or I should say thought she only recently met. Although, this also makes sense to her personality due to the trauma of growing up with a name, which made her a target for bullies.

Scenery
There is just enough to show the story without making things overly drawn-out. You show the most in the traffic scene, which is the most important scene in the story. This brings more attention to it and is fitting. Plus, the scenery is thrown into the actions of the story, making it an important part of the plot.

Plot
The plot is great. There are is enough twists to keep the reader curious without giving away the conclusion. The little surprise was really romantic too.

The only area that caused me to pause is when we find out her boss gave out her personal information. For me, this seemed unrealistic because it is very unprofessional and illegal.

Mechanics
I didn't find any structural issues within the writing. Well done on the editing aspect.

Final thoughts
I enjoyed this story. It is a great little story with plenty of surprises to keep the reader reading. Thanks for sharing it!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
24
24
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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Hi, Snow! I ran across this emotive little write while browsing the random read and reviews. Your words sort of punch the reader in the gut, forcing them to see the horrors that exist.

There is some strong language here that really impact the reader. This line is especially effective:

"while on the street corners of extinction
innocence victims gather,"

Reading this line, I felt I was looking at a crowd of people gathered in an area, doing mundane things, unafraid as if they were going to have several tomorrows ahead, when in fact soon they will be dead. It is quite chilling if you think about it.

Excellent verse! Hopefully, you won that round. Thank you for sharing your writing. *Heart*
25
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Review of Meditation on Sun  
Review by warpedsanity
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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What a lovely little poem!

There are a few aspects that make this poem stand out to me. For one, the parallels between the darkness of the second verse and light is somewhat like an analogy in life. Even in the darkest moments, there is light.

With the second verse, there is the language that has a dreary feel then the last verse ends with the enlightenment of giving life. Then that third creates a good rhythm in this poem and a dramatic effect, right before the calming of the last verse.

Overall, a great little poem! Good luck in the contest!

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