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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/yesmrbill
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24 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Dream 1-7-18  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
I’ve also read the theory that God, Jesus and all spiritual beings, are actually extra-terrestrials from an infinitely advanced society. I don’t know what your actual religious beliefs are; but as a committed Christian, I’d say that the theory in this story is blasphemous. It limits God, when He is infinitely greater than what the theory says.

If you’re interested, I’ve posted a number of stories in my portfoliio in which God, as revealed in the Bible, interacts with people.

Another thing. The reason I gave this work only a 3 star rating, is the formatting. It's much too small. People with vision problems might have trouble reading it. I suggest you change the text size to 3.5. You should also put single spaces between your paragraphs.
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Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: E | (5.0)
I agree. I have been writing on the internet since 2006. I am a writer of original fiction, and fan fiction along with some non-fiction articles. I've written short stories, novellas, and full length novels.
I posted one of those novels on a different website, where it received more than 200 feedbacks; most of them with 4 or 5 star ratings. I also wrote another novel with a collaborator, which received about 100 4 & 5 star ratings. I self published them, and they have been available for purchase at amazonbooks.com, for several years.
However, those two novels, along with some shorter works, have been purchased by less than a dozen people. This has led me to the conclusion that no matter how good your writing is, don't quit your day job.
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Review of My First Beer  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is one truly disturbing recollection of a family tragedy. You have my full sympathies. My father was also a drinking man. He had me drinking beer at the dinner table, when I was also about six. I didn't like the taste, and never wanted to drink it again. He often ridiculed me because of that. He lived until he was 84, and I have many troubling memories about him.
I really don't want to discuss this. Do you have any other writings you'd like me to read, that might not bring back disturbing personal memories?

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Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
This is an intriguing introduction into what is apparently a tale of spiritual conflict, throughout one woman's life, beginning at early childhood. This prologue is interesting enough to make me want to continue reading.
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Review of IT DIDN'T  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: E | (4.0)
Ephesians 6: 10-19.

"Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

"Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

"Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel."
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Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
How about this? The President is Donald....Duck!
There is a strong similarity between both characters.
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Review of Ruby Chapter One  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
A very good chapter one. Good enough to make me curious enough to read chapter two.

This starts out as a seemingly routine story about a typical high school girl, who's trying to deal with conflicting feelings, about her classmates; her maybe future boyfriend; her twin sister, teacher, mother, etc. In the middle of this, she learns that she is someone with magical powers, and that she has to be careful using them.

This means that she's going to be dealing with very dangerous temptations. That alone is enough to make this reader curious enough to continue reading any continuing chapters, and find out how she deals with them.
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Review of Confused  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
If you're not writing fiction, and you really feel as bad as you say, this may be helpful.

Ephesians 6:10-20:

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his power. Put on the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For our struggle is not against enemies of blood and flesh, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to withstand on that evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand therefore, and fasten the belt of truth around your waist, and put on the breastplate of righteousness. As shoes for your feet put on whatever will make you ready to proclaim the gospel of peace. With all of these, take the shield of faith, with which you will be able to quench all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Pray in the Spirit at all times in every prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert and always persevere in supplication for all the saints. Pray also for me, so that when I speak, a message may be given to me to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel,for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it boldly, as I must speak.
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Review of The Sower  
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a very fine sermon. All that needs to be said. Amen.

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10
Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: E | (2.5)
I have apparently made a posting error. Right now, at the top of the contest listing, I see my short story "E-Mails in a Vampire Town". That was intended to be an entry into the "Para Normal Romance Short Story Contest".

I just joined this website about one week ago, and I'm finding it very confusing to work with.

Will someone please explain to me exactly what I should do to correct this error?

Thank you.
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Review by Yesmrbill
Rated: E | (4.0)
Robyn is either suddenly endowed with unbelievable powers, or she is delusional and prone to hallucinations.

If she's delusional, this could be a very disturbing work, maybe even depressing, unless her mind is set right. Then it could be very inspirational.

If she really does have these powers; it could be a very fascination adventure into who know what or where.
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