Dear Rumpus Room,

...is it worth publishing or is it just my ego wanting to be noticed good or bad?

Dear Rumpus Room,

I would like to thank you for this wonderful opportunity. Writing in this way has been exhilarating.

One of my main stumbling blocks has been not knowing what to write about; no fresh ideas. Also, what I have written seems childish by comparison. When I go back to my port and read the short stories I planned on self-publishing, they seem so small and foolish.

Six months ago I gave up my dream of seeing the short stories all together in a book. How much of this is "him" talking in my head? At this point I don't know anymore. I thought I had made peace with this issue; I was okay with not publishing the stories. Now I find I still want this, matter-of-fact, I want it very much. But...will anyone read it? I don't want my ego to make a fool of me.

Oh, there it is...bottom line, is it worth publishing or is it just my ego wanting to be noticed good or bad?

Maybe I'm being self-indulgent. Another ploy for getting attention, if so, I could do without it and apologize for dragging you along.

Eckhart Tolle talks of just being in the moment. This is the only moment that matters. He says that when you stop the voice in your head or at least slow "him" down and become quiet and in the moment, creativity may then flow. "He" is on a rampage today.

"He" thinks this letter is a bad idea. "He" says it isn't going to stop him from saying what "he" thinks. And "he" says it doesn't matter what "The Artist's Way" or "A New Earth" says, "he" is here to stay and I should just deal with it.

Just deal with it. Just deal with it. Today, I don't know how. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Maybe tomorrow my confidence will be back and I can move forward.

I have know idea if I addressed the assignment. Reading back through, I never came close. Hopefully my creativity will shine through the cracks in "his" ego. Thanks for listening to what my addled brain has to say.

Sincerely yours,
Daniels (and "him")