Humor about a bathroom that seems to be shrinking...or is it?
|Originally Written for Writer's Cramp
Prompt: write a poem or story entitled: No Room in the Bathroom. Write about a member of the family who tells it like it is: his/her problem – only one bathroom for a whole large family.
NO ROOM IN THE BATHROOM - A CONVERSATION
Wife: Dear husband of mine --
My true Love divine,
Sorrow has crinkled my brow.
For I trot to the loo,
To do as I do,
And find I’m constricted somehow.
In such a tight place,
There isn’t much space,
I'm sure there was once more than that.
For the life of my mother,
I cannot uncover,
Why now I can’t sit where I’ve sat.
Husband: Olivia, my sweet --
With quaint little feet,
I’m grieved that you suffer this way.
The house is no taller,
And bathroom no smaller,
Than when we first came here to stay.
Wife: But, Henry for sure,
You’re being demure,
Of course you have seen as I do--
When I get to the pot,
Preparing to squat,
My knees rub the tub, not true?
Husband: Dear Mother that spawned,
Six girls and one son,
I pray no assault to your ear.
‘Tis not only your knees,
That have grown by degrees,
But your top and your middle, and rear.
Wife: Now listen you coot!
You wretched old brute --
A litter I’ve born lyin' beside ‘ya.
Your money’s not squandered
Your shirts are all laundered
Now build me a bathroom that’s wid'a!!