Disconnection

my first attempt at poetry..

Holding tight, holding on,
Entangled in paranoia, finding him gone

I said I’d change, he said no don’t
I knew I couldn’t, he wished I would
I wanted more, he wanted less
He found less, more, I found more, less

Holding tight, holding on,
Entangled in paranoia, finding him gone

The insecurity, the uncertainty
The self doubt, the yearning
I tried again, he pulled away
I pulled back, he walked away

Holding tight, holding on,
Entangled in paranoia, finding him gone

The realization, the contrition
The nostalgia, the seclusion
Holding him close, driving him far
Tightening the clasp, shattering the bond

Holding tight, holding on,
Entangled in paranoia, finding him gone

He was always mine, as I was his
The dispassion merely my mind’s play
My anxiety instilling a compelling fixation
My fixation mounting the walls of his prison

Holding tight, holding on,
Entangled in paranoia, finding him gone