A "black sheep" daughter's perception of her relationship with her father
|My father said, "She's not right in the head", as he spoke to my teen-age son.
He was referring to me, his biggest disappointment, a daughter on the run.
My search for happiness angered him, he thought I was wasting my life.
He hated my adventurous nature, and he wished I'd just be a wife.
At 26, I moved back to Texas to start my life all over,
How was I supposed to know that all he'd do was hover?
"Back off old man, I'm not 18. This is not where you live anymore."
"Don't bang on the door at 8 a.m. just to treat me like a whore."
My mother said, "Don't forget - you live in a house we own."
"I won't forget, I can't forget, because he won't leave me alone."
A few months passed and he started again and I desperately needed some peace.
I found an apartment that I could afford and in a week, I signed the lease.
About one year later, he gave me away when I married and said "I do."
After 29 years, I finally heard him say, "Sis, I'm so very proud of you."
As the years dragged on, my unhappiness grew and I always felt so low.
The only reason I stayed so long was because I had nowhere else to go.
At 34, when Mama died, he simply forgot I was there.
I needed my Father to help me through, but you never even cared .
At 35, I moved away to be with my first true love.
Mom finally saw me happy as she watched me from above.
You ignored me and you judged me then you acted like a kid.
You say that you're a Christian after all those things you did.
But no matter what, I love you, Daddy, I'll never go too far.
I have forgiven the person I used to be and accepted you for who you are.