Sample of Chapter 2 of the Male Wedding Planner, comments would be appreciated!!
Ellie could not believe what she seeing. Not only had her brothers antics at the Hennessey wedding ruined their chances of a bonus and embarrassed them in front of half of the “Cheshire set” therefore, ruining their chance of 1000’s of pounds of potential future business, he now had to go and do this- what was wrong with him????
It was a few weeks after the ill fated Hennessey wedding, and Ellie was sat alone in the office she shared with her brother at Fantasia waiting for him to grace them with his presence. Outside Ellie could hear Eva giggling so could only assume that she was looking at the same thing that she was.
Let me catch you up. It seems as if one of the OK Magazine photographers at the Hennessey wedding got a few pictures of Mike rising from the lake “a la Mr Darcy.” They were published the next week in the issue meant for the wedding on the bloody front page entitled “a Mr Darcy for the new generation.” This meant that the Bride and Groom were knocked onto page 3 and she’d had to endure hours of ranting from Chloe Swindell nee Hennessey threatening to sue them. And now he’d gone and done this.
In her hand, she held a copy of this weeks OK Magazine. Once again her brother had found his way onto the cover. This time the shots were posed as if taken in a studio and he was wearing a tux jacket and little else with a red rose between his teeth.
The headline screamed “Would you want this man to plan your wedding?” Inside there was a 4 page spread of Mike including two more pictures- 1 of him half naked on a bed and the other of him very much naked and covering his private parts with a copy of the upmarket local bridal magazine “Cheshire Brides.”
The article featured quotes from Mike “Mr Darcy for the new generation” Rouass explaining how he single-handedly planned weddings for the “Cheshire set” and had done the now famous Mr Darcy stunt as a favour to the Bride to Be who was “an old flame”.
“Shame he didn’t tell her that before he did it wasn’t it?” Ellie screamed slamming the magazine on the table and earning a frightened cough from Eva who was frantically answering the phone which was now ringing off the hook and giving Ellie an even worse headache.
The picture weren’t even the worst part. Mike’s quotes were inter-mingled with quotes from past bridesmaids, mothers of the brides, brides and previous attendees at other weddings they had planned in the past, exposing his bad behaviour and antics to the whole world. Or at least the female part of it who read OK Magazine and their husbands who read it when no one else was looking! The writer concluded with the story of Mikes own ruined non-wedding and the reasons why and asked again, “would you want this man to plan your wedding?” This was a disaster. They were ruined.
Oblivious to the nature of the OK Magazine article, Mike strolled into Starbucks in Wilmslow and eagerly awaited picking up a copy at the newsagents to enjoy with his coffee. Whilst in the queue he received some odd looks from some of the other patrons and realised that this was what it was like to be famous- they must have seen the article! He smiled at the woman next to him who threw him a dirty look and moved up the queue further away from him. That was strange…maybe he’d slept with her in the past and she was pissed off that he hadn’t remembered.
Getting to the front of the queue he ordered his caramel macchiato and passed over his money at the till. “Hey, you’re that guy from OK Magazine” the barista said loudly. Several other customers turned to look at him as he smiled proudly and said loudly “yes that’s me, would you like an autograph?”
“No I would not,” the barista said shoving his coffee at him across the counter. “I don’t know how you dare show your face after what you did to your fiancée and those other brides.” This was echoed by several other patrons as he left the coffee shop not quite sure what was going on. Scratching his head he picked up his coffee and made a hasty retreat.
He shook it off as he crossed the street to the office. Well at least his sister would be happy now. She’d been so mad at him since the Hennessey wedding that he hadn’t told her about the article. He’d wanted it to be a surprise. He was sure it would get them loads more business and couldn’t wait for the shoe to be on the other foot and for her to have to apologise to him!
Opening the door to the office he smiled at Eva who was sat at her desk frantically pressing the hold button on the phone, a copy of OK magazine on her desk.
“Hey Eva, what do you think?” he asked her.
“It makes interesting reading Mike,” she replied not quite meeting his eyes.
‘Oh she’s acting all shy over the half naked pictures!’ he thought, ‘how sweet, maybe he’d offer to sign a copy for her!!’
“Have the phones been ringing off the hook?” he asked her.
“Yes,” she replied, “all of the May through to September weddings have been cancelled and Ellie’s told me to give them all of their deposits back as a gesture of good will.”
“That’s fantastic,” he replied, “I knew we’d get loads of business out of this.” It only took a minute for his brain to catch up and realise what she’d said. He turned around, looked at Eva and said “what?”
It was at this point that his sister realised that he’d arrived and shouted “Mmmmmiiicccchhhheeeeaaaallll” in a thunderous voice and he realised that something must have gone wrong VERY VERY wrong.
“What the hell is this?” his sister shouted shoving the magazine in his face. “Were you trying to finish the job and completely ruin our business?”
“No! I thought you’d be pleased. I thought that the exposure would get us loads of business and I’d be out of the dog house actually” he told her snottily sitting down at the sofa they used for consultations. “Do you know what it took to get that Editor to do the pictures and the article?”
“Oh so now I understand,” she replied menacingly, “just how did you get her to run the article Michael?”
“I slept with her, of course,” he told her proudly.
“And…..” she replied
“And what?” he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly
“Did you call her afterwards?” she asked, her face now a terrifying two inches from his
“Well, we did the photo shoot and the article the same day so I didn’t need to did I?” He asked backing away.
“Have you read the article Michael?” she asked sitting back down again feeling defeated.
“No, why?” he asked.
“This is why,” she replied throwing the magazine at him and putting her coat on. “I hope you’re proud of yourself Michael, you’ve really done it now. We’re done. I’m dissolving the partnership and taking my money back. That should leave you with about £100 of your own money so I suggest you put it to good use and buy as many of those magazines so other people can’t as possible” and with that she left the office slamming the door behind her.
“What the hell is going on?” Michael asked himself as he looked down at the article and admired the picture of himself on the front cover. It was then that he noticed the title “Would you want this man to plan your wedding?” and his heart started pounding. He ripped open the magazine and started to read the article, fear gripping him to the chair.
“Uh, oh I’ve really done it now” he said to himself.
“Yes you have you idiot” Eva replied from behind him, “so am I out of a job or what?”
“No absolutely not!” “We will have the wedding in London and that is final.” Chloe’s mothered shouted whilst dramatically fanning herself with her handbag.
“Now listen Margaret, its Chloe’s wedding and she should have it wherever she likes,” her father tried on her behalf. An extremely good looking and successful man it was clear to everyone that he might run a company of his own but it was definitely his wife who ran his home life.
“Shut up Stuart! This is nothing to do with you!” She screamed as Stuart mouthed sorry to Chloe and backed out of the hotel room he was sharing with his wife at the Dorchester.
“It is my wedding and I will have it wherever I like and I want to have it at home in Cheshire,” she asserted, “and.....” she paused for dramatic effect, “I want Michael Rouass to plan it.”
“Why on earth would you want that scumbag to plan it?” her mother asked, eyes bulging.
“So he can see what he’s missing of course” Chloe told her mother a twinkle in her eye.
Back in Cheshire, Mike sat in his sister’s office mulling over his next move. His gaze landed once again on the ill-fated Okay Magazine article and he couldn’t help but smile at himself on the cover. Whatever else he was, he was one good looking son of a bitch.