Everything felt like it was against me. WARNING: Includes God and Satan.
What is wrong? Everything seems to be fighting you. You are getting depressed as you try to fight back. Instead of living your life through God and happy, your living through him but stressed. It feels that everyone is against you, your family and friends included. You need to stand your ground and believe that this is not what you deserve. You need to believe that God loves you and is there for you all the time. You need to believe that he means what he says when he tells you something, whether it's through someone else, or directly to you. Self, you need to kick Satan in the face and overcome the stress and obstacles thrown at you.
Self it feels as if your aunt and her boyfriend fight more because you live with them now. You need to believe that they are no worse than before. It feels that they talk behind your back, mainly when you can hear them talking about you and they dont think you can hear them. It feels as if they are judging you because of your mom. They always say the stuff about you becoming an alcoholic, a druggie, and they say you're going to start cutting yourself and try to commit suicide--just like your mother tried. If they only knew the truth, that you almost had tried two years ago, then maybe they would think again. You have God now, you never think about doing that, even when they bring it up. You need to get the faith in you that God has in you. You need to know that God has more in store for you, and you won't do any of those if you don't want to and follow God completely. You know you love God, and want to see yourself the way God sees you. Look at your strengths instead of many flaws. Just know that even when you feel that no one loves you, God will always love you. Whether you did one sin or ten that day, God forgives and loves you. He's not there to judge you. Just be yourself again. Become how you were before you moved back. In Las Vegas you had struggles, but you were still yourself, happy, and cheerful. Self, my point is this: Be who you really are, know God always loves you, have faith in yourself, and fight Satan to be happy and stress free.
God loves you,
P.S. Self, don't try to push things, just do what makes you happy and keep your responsibilities. Even when your down and out of it, God is there. Take care.