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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1839510-More-Aussie-Insanity
by Mia64
Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Comedy · #1839510
The use of red wine - makes cooking more exciting
GOANNA GOULASH

Ingredients

1 large goanna (preferably male - the gonads are a delicacy)
5 large gum leaves
3 tablespoons of anthill clay
2 very large glasses of red wine.

Method

Drain goanna body fluids and place aside
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Remove gonads and crush to a pulp
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Grind anthill clay to powder
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Finely chop gum leaves
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Combine all ingredients and mix to a paste
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Gut goanna and stuff with paste then place on fire
Take a couple of sips of red wine
Leave to cook until black, then throw it away - it's gonna taste bloody revolting.


GALAH GRUEL

Ingredients

2 very large glasses of red wine
1 mature galah - preferably dead
1/2 cup bullswool
4 cups muddy billabong water
1 cup crushed salt lick - preferably some the cattle have already licked, the saliva helps to tenderise

Method

Take a couple of sips of wine
Pluck galah and place in pot with muddy billabong water
Take a couple of smips of wine
Chuck in shalt lick
Take anover smip of wine
Add bullswool - givshes a bloody great eartshy flavour
Take another smip of wine
Leavesh to boilsh for two daysh
Drink the rest of the wine

Suggestion - invitsh shomeone to dinner thash you donsh like.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1839510-More-Aussie-Insanity