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Rated: E · Letter/Memo · Comedy · #2007350
A letter written to the Astronomical Observatory as if it were a center for astrology.
Lowell Observatory

1400 W. Mars Hill Rd.

Flagstaff, Arizona  86001

Dear Astrologer,

    Just one week after arriving in Flagstaff I know I'm going to love it here, for however long I stay.  Just try to imagine, if you can,

my joy when my new friend, Willow, (she wears organic-cotton and patchouli) told me there's an Astrology Center right here in


    It was August 10th when my guide and adviser, Miroslava, (that's her real Slavic name that she say's means Peace, so that's

what I call her), let me know that the stars said it was time for me to be moving on.  "You know, before winter sets in," she said.

Peace delivers the Slovenian Daily News back there in Cleveland, Ohio (where I lived for a couple years).  I subscribed to it

because I'm first generation American by way of Slovenian immigrant parents (they still live up in Northern Minnesota where Dad

works in a paper mill), and I want to learn a little something about where we come from.  Peace said I was to head west and

a sign would tell me when it was the right place to stop.  From the first day of the journey I was looking for some sort of

road sign, like that was really going to happen.  I ran into major car trouble on I-40 near a place called Twin Arrows, and had to

have my '63 Corvair Rampside pick-up towed in to Flagstaff.  I bought my Rampside at an estate sale for the easy price of

$378.22, but repairs, when they're needed, cost a pretty penny.  There was a charge for the tow, and the estimate for

necessary repair was major money.  So, I took this to be the sign Peace said that the stars would give me.  She was right

again.  She's always right, but then she has the stars whispering secrets to her all the time, day and night.  I'm here in

Flagstaff now, guided by the stars (through Peace).  Here in a town famous for astrology. 

    Three books I take with me every time I move are: 1) Astrology: What's Really in the Stars by J.Stewart  2) Astrology: 30

Years of Research by D.Doane  3) Astrology: Worlds Visible and Invisible by E.Blackman.  This third one is my favorite.  I'm

sure you will agree that just because we do not or cannot see something doesn't mean it isn't there, and just because we

do see it doesn't mean it is still there.  My three special books give me something I can keep hold of in a universe that is

moving and changing like some crazy carnival ride. (The kind of ride that can make a person barf.)    As you can easily

understand, I've met so many interesting people through my involvement with the stars and the secrets they hold, and I so

look forward to meeting you.  Maybe we can become friends?

    Could you please send me a schedule of any meetings and/or classes having to do with astrology?  Should I bring my

books?  What do you thing would be the right thing to wear?  I don't have much in the way of a wardrobe, but what I do

have can be mixed and matched to fit most occasions.  I just don't want to offend anyone or have people think I'm some

sort of dork or hillbillly (nothing against hillbillys, but I'm not one).  I've enclosed a stamped and self addressed envelope

so you can send that schedule I requested. 

    Just in case you're wondering, I'm an Aquarius, "The Water Bearer."  Are you familiar with the song "Aquarius" from the

1970's Broadway play, Hair?


Allen James
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