This is the "final" outline for NaNo 2016 as well as a list of literary devices I will use
|I. Phin realizes Moseley’s condition will continue to get worse. He has fashioned mechanical leg wraps for him that will help him walk for now, but they are not superior and Moseley will need more.
There is a fairly good sized gap here. Phin will not turn from a “good guy” to a “bad guy” overnight. It will be a struggle for him. He will still be making toys for Moseley at this point. Of course, he has dabbled in other, more important things. He wants Moseley to see the sun. He wants that more than anything. Phin was a ward of the state from an early age, but he remembered his father talking about the sun. His father was usually drunk, so he took this with a grain of salt. He did not think it was true, but he dreamed about it as a boy, as he laid in a room full of other kids who, like himself, had been abandoned.
When Phin starts to see the power of the things he is now inventing, he starts to feel more powerful and believes that he can affect change in Capercairn.
Phin will continue to doubt himself as he goes through the trial and error of building his controller. He starts on a very small scale, creating clockwork minions who will carry out the actual work of changing the weather.
II. Zenith talks Phin into joining The Alliance. Phin agrees to at least check it out and see how it can help him.
Phin’s first trip behind the wall of The Alliance, a place most do not get to see,
III. Phin decides to help The Alliance by making clockwork minions that can help to infiltrate The State headquarters. This has already happened in the new version. The minions will be needed to change the weather, so Phin will already be working on them. The Alliance members, though, will help him place them and get them to the strategic location to unleash the fury of what was once only a phenomenon over which Mother Nature had control.
IV. Phin winds up in prison when the minions are tracked back to him. He says they were a child’s toy that ran amuck and pleads uneducated in such matters. Phin will be released as quickly as he was apprehended. He does not understand why, but when he gets out, he realizes he is being followed. He brushes it off as being paranoid. In reality, someone from the State has been charged with following him and finding out what he is up to.
V. Phin decides he must leave his family and help the Alliance. This is his big internal conflict - but he is now under tight scrutiny.
When he leaves is when Moseley’s expertise as a tinker really comes through. He starts to work on another part of his father’s invention - but Phin does not know this until he shows up at The Alliance hide-out/tavern near the edge of town by the mountains.
Phin may also learn a bit more about his boss and mentor at this point. He may learn that Garthwaite is completely against the State and willing to use all of his military training against them. He will ready the fleet of aircabs to become fighting machines. In fact, he already has the equipment to do this. He was just waiting for the right time. He has had this equipment stored away in an abandoned warehouse/hangar since The State was created when Carby Gorse took over. Phin may also learn a bit about the relationship between Garthwaite and Gorse (one of these name may change so I don’t have rivals with the last name starting with the same letter).
VI. Phin continues to work on his weather controller, but eventually, before he thinks it’s ready, he is imprisoned again for treason. This will be the turning point of the novel. This is when it starts to get “real”, as they say.
VII. The Alliance, including Phin’s brother Zenith, and Moseley and some of his friends, come to break Phin out of prison in the midst of a riot. They actually break out several Alliance members. It is time to put their plan into action. They plan to rise up against the State. This is the first time the Phin will see Moseley and his friends dressed in Alliance attire. He can’t help but feel pride in seeing his son like this.
VIII. Tensions between The Alliance and The State are at an all-time high. Moseley refuses to go home and intends to help, with his friends - Zenith puts them to work. This is wrong with the new storyline. When Phin gets out of prison, it is full-blown war. Moseley and his friends are already entrenched. Although Phin wants him to go, he knows his son will stand right by his side.
Upon further review, Moseley’s help is integral. He will not only show his worth as a scientist, but he will be showing his father the love he feels for him and his willingness to do anything, to go to any lengths, to help him in his quest to return Capercairn to the land it once was.
IX. Ana, Phin’s wife is left alone. He worries greatly for her and tries to get home to see her. He is again apprehended.I’m not sure if he will get apprehended again or not. It will depend on how many “impossible” situations he has already gotten himself out of at this point. If he has been in too many already, I will skip this one. But, nonetheless, he will have to go fairly deep into State property to retrieve Ana. He will risk great danger to do this. But he needs Ana by his side.
This is where Ana shines. While Phin is away, she is gathering information. She becomes the seamstress and hair dresser most in demand by those in The State. She is in their confidence and hovers near the inner circle. She hears all and acts the fool entirely. The being said, the State officers will be most willing to talk in front of her. This will put her in grave danger once it is clear Phin knows things that were spoken only in front of Ana. They will realize her claims of an unhappy relationship with her airship/can captain husband who is nothing more than a tinker, are all a ruse.
X. Phin is saved again by The Alliance. He must now put his weather controller to the ultimate test. Whether he gets in trouble and detained again by the State, his weather controller will be undergoing the ultimate test. The Alliance forces have been attacking the state, but they will soon be overtaken without help. This is where the weather controller will come in. Phin does not know how much his machine can take - but he also does not know how much Moseley has done to the machine while he has been away. Somehow Mose has enhanced the power to get the controller to where it needs to be to be effective.
Someone has also delivered minions to someone outside of Capercairn. They will need to be up in the hills, but still close enough to be used and controlled. That means they would most likely need to be guarded.
XI. Ultimately, his weather controller will quash The State to a point where The Alliance can take over and the people will be free of the empirical rule.
Gorse will be killed in the final scene. He will be in an altercation with Phin, who is not a killer - nor does he intend to be a killer. He is in a struggle with Gorse when Garthwaite finds him. Garthwaite has a long-standing axe to grind with Gorse. He will kill him and save Phin’s life. Phin did not think his boss/mentor would do something like that - but I have to do this without making Phin seem weak.
Literary devices to use:
I love to use “The Hook”, and I will, of course, attempt that here. I am not sure what it will be - perhaps something with Moseley.
Foreshadowing is always a good tool. I will use it early to show that, while Phin is mild-mannered, he has his breaking point. This, of course, will also involve Moseley and his disabilities.
Chekov’s gun: I think this would be a fun one to use, although I have used it before, but in a completely different way. It may invovled Moseley and something he does or says. Until his brilliance is revealed, no one will know of what he is capable. Chekov’s gun may also have something to do with Garthwaite. He’s a gruff individual and does not seem to cut Phin any slack when he needs to bend the rules or the timeclock to care for Moseley.