Radar Blip

Choking on the barrel

My head grows heavy from the weight of my thoughts
Will I be missed when my heart shuts down or not?

The breath of the whispers tickles my ear drum
"Don't be dumb, none will care when you're dead, be numb!"

So numb, I am, with my mask fixed tight;
a wall to keep in my depression and fright.

I'll let none be aware of the hauntings in my head,
"He was a good boy, so happy, why is he dead?"

"Barely days will pass and you'll be forgot,
they don't really love you, you're an afterthought!"

"No!" I beckon, "Don't let it be true."
The tears well up, the whispers now a roar
"THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO, OPEN THE DOOR AND LET THE BARREL ON THROUGH!"

Teeth grind metal; iron taste on the tongue
the gun slides forth; no where for my feelings to run.

"Do it, you pussy, get us out of your head, no one
will care if your sheets run red!"

"You'll only be remembered as a stain on the floor."
Never again will I let the whispers come to a roar.

A tear runs down; the taste of salt on my lips,
the hammer cocks back, and the muzzle flips.

...And so ends the life of a radar blip.