Quarantine was rough; loneliness and social anxiety and internalized homophobia
|You ever feel like you're drowning?|
and the whole world is frozen and you're locked sinking deeper into darkness
and no one's around
and you fall
and you wish you could feel what you do but you can't
and you wish you couldn't feel but you do
and you reach out and you wish and you sink and the world keeps going but yours is slowing down and as you're going down you look and you long and you can't
and you watch as you sink but nobody's around and you reach towards the surface as your lungs ache and you're slowly dragging down
So you close your eyes and you wish yourself away and push away the ache and you think and you go to fairyland and it hurts but you're happy here right? and you're drowning and you can't breathe and you thrash and you turn and you can't get out and you wake up and you can't breathe and there's water filling your lungs and it hurts even more knowing you can't have it and you try to call for help but you can't make a sound and your nose is burning and there's no one around
and after a while it just hurts dully as you sink further down
You get used to the ache as you stare in slow-motion the world turns around and you start losing focus just wishing that someone could see and come help but you can't. ask.
and you twitch a little bit but it's alright and your eyes are closed, sinking, drowning, slowly.