by Ken Page
A 20th-century inventions timeline parody.
|20TH CENTURY INVENTIONS, 1900-1930
Great inventions of the early 20th century:
In 1900 the zeppelin was invented by Jimmy Page and Robert Plant.
And Seeberg finally realized the escalator should be set at a slant.
Marconi invented radio and its very fist station.
Then survived a lawsuit from the World Voice-Throwing Federation.
Herbert Booth invented the vacuum cleaner.
Then realized vacuums were empty, so couldn't possibly need cleaning.
In summer 1902, Carrier's air conditioner could-a given homes more comfort.
But air is very independent and found its conditions unacceptable and abhorrent.
The new lie detector was misunderstood, when first unveiled, something funny occurred.
No one in the room would say a single word!
The teddy bear was born and went on to glory.
The bare teddy was too, but that's a different story.
The tractor was invented in the 19 aughts.
Due respect to all Trekkies the tractor beam was not.
The Model T was invented but the buying public stayed clear.
Most buyers preferred waiting for the full-sized version to appear.
For a planned line of see-through blouses Paul Poiret sees a flaw,
when in 1913 Mary Phillips Jacobs invents the bra.
In 1920 Earle Dickinson invents the band-aide.
Soon after, little Bobby Wilson invents the scrapped knee, on the playground in 3rd grade.
Garret Morgan creates the first traffic red light.
Two minutes later Randy "Bowser" Jackson invents running a red light.
In 1923 Clarence Birdseye invents frozen food.
The frozen part, not the food!
Technicolor comes along in 1927,
allows the creation of techni-movies, and viewers are in seventh heaven.
Two thousand miles apart, Frank Whittle and Dr. Hans von Ohain claim credit for the jet engine's invention.
But Whittle couldn't explain how his engine came to be found in von Ohain's workshop, giving his claim much suspicion.
and The Drive-by Historians