Where was Moses?

Members of the jury
I thank you for your time
I’m sure that with a little thought
We’ll shed light on this crime

‘Cause Moses couldn’t do it
No matter what you’ve heard
These accusations aren’t true
In fact, they are absurd

We know what time it happened
Just when the lights went out
But I can prove beyond a doubt
He was nowhere about

My client wasn’t near there
And I will tell you why
When all the lights went out that night
He has an alibi

He was down in the cellar
That’s where he often goes
He takes his favorite snack with him
As everybody knows

You may have reservations
I understand your doubt
Not everyone would be the type
To relish sauerkraut

He didn’t have a hot dog
He ate it from the can
I couldn’t do that, I confess
He is the bigger man

That’s why he had to hide there
As strange as it appears
They told him take his sauerkraut
And eat it down the stairs

‘Cause no one else could stand it
They couldn’t take the smell
So he went off to eat his kraut
Way down in that deep cell

So who else could have done it?
Miss Scarlet comes to mind
Or maybe it was Colonel Mustard
He may be the kind

It could be anybody
I haven’t got a clue
But neither does the prosecutor
That is nothing new

But one thing I can tell you
As I have said before
My client didn’t do this deed
Of that you can be sure

Where was Moses when the lights went out?
Down the cellar eating sauerkraut!

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