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Rated: 18+ · Bulletin · Educational · #2251306
News and silly laws. Public health, public safety
Question: Did you kiss your birds today?

In The News

A few days ago the CDC posted a new warning for the public. “Don’t kiss birds.”

I have been flying around all day looking for birds to kiss but with no luck because they move too fast.

As you already know, Florida has no good bird laws but they do have a law prohibiting people from having sexual relations with porcupines and alligators. I wonder Why?

In any event, 2 young men in their early 30s drove from Texas to Florida wanting to challenge our laws. They came here to my state looking for alligators and porcupines to seduce. One of them almost succeeded in having his way with one of our porcupines. The news report did not say if it was a male or female porcupine. These days I guess it doesn’t matter. The police were alerted. The 2 men fled back to Texas. One of them ended up in the hospital with severe injuries to his genitals. I guess that will teach him not to mess around with our critters here in Florida.

I hope those Texans don’t read the recent news report from Fauchi and the CDC about kissing birds. We need to post a notice at our borders, “Hey Perverts!” “Leave our feathered friends and other critters alone.” “Leave your peckers in your pockets and in your pants. "Stay home you perverts.”

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