Just a very sill story about a baby wishing upon a star.
|PULL DOWN THE BLINDS!
One cloudless night the Northern Light shone bright in Owen’s eyes.
He wished, as many babies do, to multiply in size.
Then Owen grew much faster than a baby ought to grow.
He burst out of his clothing as he stretched from head to toe.
His parents put him in his crib, then heard from overhead -
Crr-ash! Ka-boom! Waah! Poor Owen busted through his bed.
In need of extra elbow room he moved into the hall
with bedsheets for his bottom and no clothes to wear at all.
He transferred to the living room; he slept out on the floor
Until...his arms broke through the walls and feet pushed through the door.
They called the local doctor, “You must tell us what to do!
He’s much too big to carry; he’s outgrown his diapers too!”
“I’m sorry,” said the doctor, “but as far as I can tell,
his symptoms say he suffers from the workings of a spell.
I offer no prescription but to buy a bigger place,
or maybe just a circus tent for ample growing space.”
His parents, now hysterical, appealed to 9-1-1:
“Someone has to help us; we’ve a two-ton baby son!”
“Except a call to Guinness,” said the operator’s voice,
“a session with the sorcerer might be your only choice.”
The father had to trek to town to talk to Warlock Sam,
who had no phone or internet (too overwhelmed by Spam).
“I beg your help,” the father pled. “Our baby boy’s been cursed.
He’ll be as big as Everest if this spell is nor reversed!”
“Two hundred thousand dollars per expulsion,” Sam replied.
“But sir, we haven’t got the cash,” the frantic father cried.
“I’ll put you on a payment plan with rates you can afford –
Imagine what his food will cost if size is not restored.”
“We really have no options, so just show me where to sign.
I want to halt this madness and to hold that son of mine.”
Within the minute both of them were at the shattered house.
The father found the baby, but he could not find his spouse.
“She’s under him,” said Warlock Sam. “The baby’s on her lap.”
“Be quick; we need to shrink him down. My wife is gonna snap!”
Next Warlock Sam surveyed the scene then sang a simple song,
“Your fun is done, oh Giant one. To bigness say so long!”
He nodded, winked and tipped his hat, then added for effect
a rainbow-colored cloud of smoke a radar could detect.
But when, at last, the air was cleared and Sam had worked his charms,
the father and the mother cuddled Owen in their arms.
Despite the budgetary loss, some normalcy returned
and Owen grew as babies grow, his parents unconcerned.
Until one night the northern light again shown in his eyes…