Raising Arizona

Multi part series, depicting my time in Arizona

Part One

After a particularly nasty break up with my live in partner, a friend, who I considered to be my soul sister, offered me respite and a new start, but it required a move from California to Arizona. When I called her, in the presence of my ex, I blubbered about what had just occurred. We were in the midst of a volatile argument, one that had him throwing things at me. I had her on speaker phone and she could hear the rage in his voice. She said, "Sissy, give me twenty minutes. Just hang on and I will call you right back. Go into the spare room and lock the door."

I did as I was told. I laid on the neatly made bed in the guest room and cried so hard that I could not breathe. My mind swirled with desperation. I was woefully disabled. Unemployed. And nowhere else to go. Less than the stated twenty minutes had passed before my sister called me back. "Well, Sissy, you're coming to Arizona tomorrow. I have already booked your bus ticket. Pack up whatever you can fit in that big ol' suitcase of yours and we will be seeing you in Tucson tomorrow evening".

I was gobsmacked. My whole world left in a million little pieces. A huge decision had been made for me, and really, there was no other option, so I was a mess of heartbreak and anxiety. Ex was pounding on the door. I cautiously opened it and backed up enough to give me space to duck or move if he came after me. He tried to appear calm as he said, "You don't have to go anywhere in a hurry. We can figure out where you can go. I'll give you time. There's no rush." I wanted to spit in his face, but I restrained myself. "I'll be out of your hair tomorrow. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to pack up, peacefully." I said. "Let me guess, you're going to Arizona?" I could see the anger bubbling up, and his face was going from pink to red. "Yes. Selena already bought my ticket. I leave at ten a.m." I replied.

I was trying to keep emotion out of it. He exploded, "Must be fucking nice to have friends like that! So you're just gonna run away like this?" He was bordering on furious. I nodded and asked him for a little privacy so I could decide what to take with me. He spit venom with his words, "Must be fucking nice! I don't have friends like that! I only have you and Andrea!" (Andrea being the autistic girl he had developed a whole relationship with, a girl who was considerably younger than him by twenty years. A girl who dropped out of school in the seventh grade. A girl I believed he groomed and love bombed just like he did with me.)