Where My Bra and Panty Fetish Began

A brief, so to speak, origin story of my bra and panty fetish (from about age 12 to 18)

After writing a number of fictional stories involving my bra and underwear fetish, I figured that I would explore where it came from in the first place. Maybe this will also help jog my memory for why I still enjoy and think about bras and panties to this day as well. Anyways, everything I'll be writing is going to be real and non-fiction; not just my thoughts or fantasies and desires.

Earliest Exposure
When I was around 12 or 13 years old, an awkward moment sparked a curious fascination. One morning, likely tasked by our parents to wake my sister for school, I barged into her room without knocking and caught her in a white bra and panty set. Frozen in place, I was met with her sharp yell to get out. Though I hadn’t yet had sex ed, I instinctively recognized her outfit as underwear, sparking questions about why girls’ underwear differed so much from mine—why the extra piece for the chest, why the cute designs? As a kid who often stayed home sick, I found myself alone with these thoughts and, admittedly, too curious to resist peeking into my sister’s underwear drawer when no one was around. To be clear, my fascination was never about my sister herself—we were just close in age, and she was one of the few girls I knew. If I’d had a girlfriend or close female friend at the time, my curiosity likely would’ve shifted to their underwear instead.

Scary Movie
During a summer sleepover at my friend’s house, we indulged in our shared obsession with anime like Pokémon and Yu-Gi-Oh, battling it out with trading cards and video games. Oddly, between duels, he’d play episodes of Teletubbies on his TV—a show meant for toddlers that I have no idea how he convinced me to watch, or if he even bothered trying. The real shock came when he abruptly switched from Teletubbies to suggesting we watch Scary Movie. Barely teenagers, I was thrilled to sneak a movie my parents would’ve banned at home, something more suited to our age. The jarring shift from toddler tunes to raunchy horror-comedy was pure whiplash, but I loved it—laughing at classics like the “Wazzap!” scene. Yet, it was the opening with Carmen Electra’s character, being stalked by Ghostface and running through sprinklers in slow-motion, wearing just a sexy lace bra and panties, that stuck with me. That image lived rent-free in my mind for a while, a guilty pleasure that I was glad my friend didn’t notice me savouring, sparing me the embarrassment.

Survivor
Every Thursday night, my family and I gathered to watch Survivor, back when the show emphasized survival and social dynamics over the advantages and gimmicks that dominate today. I was drawn to the players’ interactions, their personalities clashing and meshing in fascinating ways. The humid environment was evident, with contestants often wearing minimal clothing. While there were plenty of in-shape men competing shirtless, as a heterosexual guy, my attention was elsewhere. Many of the women were fit and some notably busty, their bras’ material and design catching my eye. I think it was an early season, possibly Palau, where I noticed several women competing in bras and underwear rather than bikinis. The distinction was clear—bras were prettier, though not fancy or lacy, likely to withstand the elements and physical challenges. Knowing these women wore such bras daily, under their clothes, resonated with me on both a subconscious and conscious level. And yes, I’m glad my parents didn’t notice me savouring the wondrous scenes on tv. It would’ve come as a complete shock to them that I even had an interest in girl’s underwear, seeing that I groaned at the thought of back-to-school shopping.

Green Day/Jimmy Eat World Concert
During the American Idiot World Tour, I attended a concert featuring Jimmy Eat World and Green Day, both of whom I’d been a fan of for years. The venue was packed with close to a thousand people, and the energy was electric as both bands kept the crowd entertained with jokes and playful banter between songs. Jimmy Eat World took the stage first, but their performance, especially when they launched into the iconic opening riff of The Middle, was so powerful you’d never guess they were the opening act. As soon as the song started, it was like a memo went out to every young woman in the audience: they began stripping off their sweaty t-shirts, revealing bras and panties underneath, in a spontaneous yet deliberate homage to the band’s music video where partygoers dance in their underwear. Having loved the video beforehand, witnessing this live was a hilarious and sexy spectacle—a lethal combination for someone with a secret bra fetish. While I was there for the music, I couldn’t complain about the unexpected show unfolding around me. And since the girls stayed in their bras by the time Green Day took to the stage, I’m pretty sure I remember Billie Joe commenting more than a couple of times on the sea of beautiful women in their bras in front of him.

Bra and Underwear Sites on My Parents’ Computer
Before I got my own laptop, I spent countless hours on my parents’ computer, indulging my fascination with bras and panties by scouring every lingerie website I could find. After school, while waiting for my parents to return home, I’d lose myself browsing these sites. One Italian lingerie brand stood out, despite its website being entirely in Italian, which I couldn’t understand. It featured stunning photos and diagrams of models in their bras and underwear, including a young blonde woman who caught my attention with her playful, almost mischievous grin—later I’d learn it was called a “shit-eating grin”—as she held a sucker close to her face, modelling a lacy reddish-pink bra and panty set that was both adorably cute and irresistibly sexy. It made me wonder if European lingerie brands have mastered the art of balancing cute and sexy in their marketing, something North American brands often struggle to achieve. Another site I frequented leaned more toward adult entertainment, showcasing a daily rotation of bra and panty models from that world. Clicking on their pictures led to each model’s unique collection. I was drawn to several models, not just for their charming underwear choices but for how they posed—making cute or silly faces at the camera while bending in ways that highlighted the intricate details of their lingerie and accentuated their cleavage. The contrast between their innocent expressions and the sultry allure of their underwear was captivating.

Arts Camp
From 8th grade through 12th, I eagerly attended an annual camp alongside hundreds of other students from across the school board, participating in either music or drama or visual arts. One of the highlights was the camp-wide Olympics event held on one of the final days, where we were divided into teams representing different countries. The competitions were lively and varied, ranging from balancing an egg while biking around a baseball diamond to soccer shootouts, beanbag tossing, and tug of war. My lack of balance and poor aim likely made me the weak link on my team, much to my chagrin. One year, a sudden downpour interrupted the festivities, canceling the tug-of-war finale. That same rainy day, I found myself on a team with two girls I had crushes on, both wearing light-coloured t-shirts that became partly see-through when soaked, revealing the outlines of their bras. Although their shirts were drenched and partly see-through, I was unable to tell what bras they had on. But seeing that the camp was considered school adjacent, neither of their bras were particularly “busy.” They had on cute little t-shirt bras. Unaware of my feelings, they caught me staring and, to my relief, responded with giggles and playful teasing as we dashed back to our cabins to change into dry clothes, turning an embarrassing moment into a lighthearted memory.

Drama Class
After enjoying drama improv classes at camp, I continued taking them in high school, joining a class of about 20 students where my friend and I, along with three other boys, were outnumbered by girls. As a painfully shy teen with poor memorization and acting skills, I faced an uphill battle, especially around girls, but I grew more comfortable after performing successful skits with a couple of them. One day, while browsing Facebook, I stumbled upon the profile of a girl I liked from class and saw photos of her and another girl I liked, dancing affectionately in a bedroom adorned with band posters, wearing only bras and jeans. One was skinny with a taste for lacy bras, while the other, curvier, wore more supportive yet pretty ones. This was before teenage sexting became a widely discussed topic, but I had no intention of sharing what I saw. Back in class, I noticed a group of girls, including the two from the photos, giggling and whispering. Knowing exactly what they were discussing but feigning ignorance, I asked what was funny. Ironically, as a shy, not particularly masculine teen, the girls tried to shield me from the “shocking” sexual content, unaware that I’d not only seen the pictures but harboured a secret fascination with bras and underwear.