Favourite Time of the Christmas Season

Looking for the hope and possibilities within the season.

My favourite part of Christmas as I get older has become the quiet time after Christmas and before the new year begins. The anticipation and hoopla of Christmas Day falls by the way-side and the world opens up much like walking out into a crystalline field after the stars and moon have come out. There is a peace and presence of being that you belong in the world, but are only a small dot in the infinite universe. It puts life into perspective.

It is a chance to breathe. To take stock of the past year and look forward to the new year. You stand on the precipice of possibility. What's passed is past and the lessons have been learned. The future is out there just beyond reach, but also blessedly close. A chance for a fresh start. A new beginning.

As a writer I love to take this time to write and reflect. Looking to my accomplishments and not judging their fullness or completion, but seeing where I have come from and where I want to go. Reflect and consider whether or not I should stick to my guns or make adjustments to tweak what is working and what is not.

The new year is a blank slate... a blank page or a whole new chapter. Fresh, clean and full of possibility. There is nothing sweeter than a fresh start.

One of the writing groups I used to follow used to throw themselves into a complete overhaul before the new year began. I tried their style for a few years, but I found myself getting overwhelmed before the new year even crested. I like their ideas, but I have found I must adjust and modify their excessive planning to make things feel more my size. I also remember nothing is written in stone.

I also join Beth Kempton's Winter Writing Sanctuary and let myself seep into the sweetness of this time of year. I write myself home and find my footing which I have come to find is very important at this time of year.

This year especially. Thanksgiving, and I am talking Canadian Thanksgiving, didn't happen for my family this year. My cousin Samuel was admitted to the hospital with a bowel obstruction the night before our big family dinner. His obstruction that would not breakdown was coupled with more cancer in his colon - making this fall his last. We celebrated his 35th birthday on November 28 with fireworks and ice cream cake. He could taste, but not swallow.

Now he is in hospice waiting for his end. Christmas is coming, but we are not feeling the season. Our hearts are breaking as he starves in the face of his cancer battle.

There is an unfairness to it all in a way. He is young. Cancer has already taken his bladder and pancreas. We were hoping he was going to make it and then this..... He is a sweet person with a huge heart and yet God wants him for his angels. He will be a mighty angel.

At the same time my friend lives with a narcissist who has sucked all her dreams dry. He has turned their sons against her and left her a shadow of her former self. Why can he not have the cancer? His death would be a blessing for her. But that is not how things work.

So as we dip into this Christmas season we fight to keep our heads up and are hearts open. And I will write to process it all and find the silver lining within the chaos.