A Heagle

A cross between an American and an eagle terrorizes the city.

(This is a story that uses a prompt from Bryn Donovan’s 5000 Writing Prompts. Prompt number 6 on page 50. A cross between a human and a particular type of animal that happens to be a terrible idea.)

“Are you ready?” said Doctor Baustus, holding his sword.

“What do you mean, ‘am I ready?’” said Benefrost, his humble servant.

“Are you ready for this experiment? I am asking you a serious question.”

“Oh, I know this is serious. I know it’s serious. I just…”

“You just what?”

“I just don’t know if this is a good idea.”

“What? If what is a good idea?”

“You know precisely what I am talking about. Do not play the fool with me.”

“You’re my servant, are you not? I pay you, don’t I?”

“Did Hitler pay Goebbels?”

“Ah, again with the Hitler reference. I assume you’ll want to inform the media.”

“The media? Try an exorcist!”

“Nice, nice, nice. Very nice.”

“If only you would have listened!”

“Listened? Listened to who? To what? What should I have listened to? Where?”

“Listen to reason! Listen to goodness! Listen to…to probity!”

“Ah, probity is like a thin film. You can only see it when it’s shoved into your eye.”

“Well?”

“Well, what? What are these silly little things you keep mentioning?”

“Listen.”

“No, I don’t listen. I dictate.”

“The Dictator?”

“If that’s what you want to call it.”

“This is…an abomination! A famed beast! A deadly ballast! We truly must turn back now!”

“We will not turn back! I am the creator! My sons paid the ultimate price, with their very lives for what I am about to unveil. But their tiny, painful cries will be my ultimate salvation.”

“Ultimate salvation? What God, in what God Book, would ever sanction such an abomination?”

At the 3055 World’s Fair, there was an air of finality. Humanity needed distraction. The Final Distraction, so to speak. A diversion. A strong on the masses. The only way that they could forget. The only thing that would take them away from this place called “a normal life.”
Standing before them was the beast. But this was a special beast. The announcer told the story.

“Ladies and Gentlemen! Are you prepared to have your eyes peeled out and shoved up the tailpipe of a driverless car?”

The people thronged. Their screams as thin as film. Cholera destroying their lungs.

“Here it is! Your beast! Your enemy! The evil of a cross between a mighty American prisoner and a brave bald eagle! Some say he’s killed over a hundred inmates! And…!”

Suddenly, the human/eagle broke its chains and flew away. The laser guns the guards used to fire at it were all connected to the same network and, thus, all failed at once.

The human eagle, a Heagle, flew in through the window of the local prison, opening all the cells at once, and springing the prisoners. Within 48 hours, the whole city was ablaze. No one knew the inmate’s original name.