Grandpa's Maxims

70 sentences of wisdom, proverbs, and wit—serious, humorous, and memorable.

It takes time to write a letter, but a letter turns time into a gift.

Speak with kindness,
write with intention,
live with adventure,
love without end—
sharing each in equal measure along the way.

The magic of words changes the lives of people we will never know.

Overthinking the details often leads to too little sleep.

I never understood Grandma when she said time moved faster as she got older. Now that I do, I wish I didn’t.

Before cooking a new recipe, keep the delivery pizza number handy—just in case.

Profound philosophy fits on a bumper sticker.

Expensive words often say the cheapest things.

If you don’t share your life, all anyone will see is the dash between two dates.

Try everything once. If it's good, try it again and again.

Walking into a pole or off a curb happens when looking back.

If allowed, imagination is far worse than reality. Things are often not as bad as the dwelling thoughts make them out to be.

Coffee, black ... unless a shot of whiskey is available.

Never turn down a free meal. When able, offer one.

When something isn’t working, a well-delivered hit a third of the way down the right side is both satisfying and effective. “Heeey.”

Gossip will tell you what was heard. Logic tells you what to think. Wisdom knows better.

When it's your circus, control your monkeys.

Leverage—use it well, but beware the backlash when abused.

“Never judge a book by its cover.” Yet a worn cover means something…

Unexpected results don't equal failure.

People who use "trust me" often don't know what it means.

Love is a kind of pain.

It's hard being what you're not.

Words live, be careful what you give birth to.

Friends, like gardens, need weeding sometimes.

The best lessons are learned by accident.

Time isn't money. It can't be saved for a rainy day.

“As seen on TV” rarely translates to “as in real life.”

It’s all good—until it’s not!

Intelligence isn’t how much you know, but how well you use what you know.

The line between opposites is often thin and blurred.

A question never asked can never be answered.

A well-placed word or comma can change everything.

If you step in muck, you will have to clean your shoes.

If you stir the pot, be prepared to lick the spoon.

Getting lost can lead to being found.

Life is seemingly ordinary. Yet, unique.

Most likely, Grandma or Grandpa has been there, done that—and they can help.

Your happiness is a burden another can't carry.

Eyes can be misdirected. Minds can be deceived. Hearts are just fools.

Want to know someone's real character? Take them for a walk in a dog park.

Trust your gut, it knows its shit.

Most people’s destiny is obscurity—because it’s easy.

Become an expert at one thing. Know many things.

Your greatest enemy can be found in the mirror.

You can turn the electronics off for an hour or so; it's okay, really.

Do what you have to do quickly. Then, you'll have time to thoroughly enjoy what you want to do.

Enjoy moments, create memories, and cherish experiences.

Hold hands … often.

Common ground can't exist if only differences are discussed.

Learn to cook an omelet, a one-dish dinner, and bake something sweet. You’ll always be able to brighten your day—or someone else’s.

It doesn't matter if the cup is half empty or half full. What matters is knowing there is a drink.

Sometimes, ignorance truly is bliss.

Hygiene is more important than personality.

Never lend money to family or friends. If you have it, gift it. If it doesn’t return, there will be no hard feelings.

Try to fix things yourself. If you still have to call a specialist, at least you’ll know for sure it’s really messed up.

Facts sway less minds than enthusiasm.

A dandelion is a flower to children—until they are taught it is a weed.

Bodily functions and noises are funny at any age.

Grandmas and Grandpas teach the best lessons in kitchens and toolboxes.

Aunts and Uncles are the friends parents can't be.

People feel most flattered when you remember their name.

Beware of what you wish for; it might come true.

Youth and energy will score points. Experience and treachery will win games.

Everyone thinks they're a beast until confronted with the need to do beastly deeds.

Another day? Challenge accepted!

Temptation is often granted.

The problem isn’t the problem—the reaction is.

Respect is a currency that pays dividends.

Always take a light when soul searching.


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