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 |  Little scraps of my life... my blog. |
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 I got an update your blog reminder! I rarely get those because I set it to remind me after a week of absence... oops.  Yes, I've been a little absent. I've been struggling to keep on top of things with class. My aim was to not get behind so when it comes to leaving for my holiday, I won't need to panic the days before trying to get all my late work handed in. It's SO much harder than you think. You get new work pretty much every class for 7 different teachers, which is usually just annoying questions and whatnot, and then you have the ongoing major assignments as well. So if for some reason, you can't seem to get motivated that class and don't do the questions, they really start to pile up. I managed to get a bit finished today and I swear, I am trying really hard. I still feel like I'm lagging behind though. Motivation is simply not my strong point. So that's basically the reason I haven't been around. I'm sorry for not commenting on blogs as much either and I really can't promise that I'll be around... I'll try though! There's so many things to remember though! Just sitting here and writing this, I've remembered two things I was meant to do earlier. However, as I moan about my lack of free time - I went shopping yesterday!  But this had been planned for some time. It was just a day out with my sister and mum to catch up a little because you have to schedule the catch-ups these days now that my sis is married. lol. It was nice though. I almost bought a hat.... a cap, actually. One of those cool caps that are fashionable lately. Everyone always says they suit me, and I've always secretly wanted one, so I saw some and was determined to buy one. But nay, it wasn't to be. The first lot were too wide and the second lot were humungous...  It was disappointing, but maybe next time I'll spot the perfect cap!But what I did buy is terribly exciting.... an iPod!!!  I wasn't particularly intending too, but I knew I needed something. The CD player I use in my car by hooking it up through an adapter (I only have a cassette player) broke the other night, and that's terrible because I really enjoy my music in the car. But the iPods were expensive and I was having a hard time justifying it (and also because I'm generally very indecisive). So Beth piped up and said she'd chip in $50 as a birthday gift three months in advance. So I bought it! It's a Nano and awfully cute. lol. In other news and not so good, my cousin who has anorexia is apparently being fed with an eyedropper. It's really horrible to hear. My grandparents came for a visit last night and they're going to see them tonight or tomorrow. There's really not much I can personally do, but it's really hard to hear knowing they're going through that. Okay, so I'd better go and do those things I keep forgetting to do! |
| *falls in, laughing...* Oh my goodness... *tears*... I just read the most hilarious comment ever. I'm laughing so hard, my eyes filled up with tears and a contact almost fell out! Remember how I said I'd joined that dating site for a joke? I think I just received the winning message. As it was written in all its glory: "owowo what a beatıful and sexxxxyyy lady you are:) ı saw your all photos:) they are wonderful:) stop smılıng and please wrıte me:) ı am wıtıng you ok sexy angel:) come on come on you are my dream. belıeve me we wıll have wonderful tıme my msn messsenger gurkangurcan@y ahoo.com please come kıss you:)" It's so terrible! Broken English is the funniest thing. I love it. Oh, dear god. It's a classic. The only reason I log into the site every now and then is to receive messages like this! *sigh* I really needed that laugh... |
| I am so grumpy. And I had an itchy vein today. Is that even possible? A particular spot on my palm was just irritating me and I couldn't seem to get the itch out because it seemed like it was under the skin and then today I realised that I was scratching right where a vein is... I could see the blue under there. Weird. But I'm downright grumpy because I'm so freakin' tired. I agreed to start work earlier tomorrow, which I don't really mind but geez... I just feel like crap. And the Week of Cheer this week has been such a chore. I know that's terrible, but I have to admit it. Every single day I've wished that I didn't have to do it. Yeah, I'm totally taking the next week off. I still enjoy it but weeks like this make it seem like it's taking up way more time than it actually is. I just need to get it out the way and let sleepytime do its thing! ARGH! Damn itchy veins. |
| I watched Transformers tonight. It was just so damn cool. It wasn't quite as good as numerous people I know have raved on about, but definitely worth watching. Totally action-packed, surprisingly funny... but there were parts where I wasn't quite sure what on earth was going on. And the storyline was a bit choppy and weak. But funny... yeah, pretty funny. Actually, parts were intentionally funny and then there were parts where I was just laughing because it was stupid. Like the classic slow-motion-voice, "What....is that?" *person in film points to scary transformer* A little bit cliched! Here's my funny quote picks: Autobot Jazz: "What's crackin' little bitches? This looks like a cool place to kick it!" Sam: Where'd he learn to talk like that? Optimus Prime: We've learned Earth's language through the World Wide Web. Barricade: Are you username: LadiesMan217? Sam: I don't know what you're talking about! Barricade: ARE YOU USERNAME: LADIESMAN217? Sam: Yeah... Barricade: Where is the eBay item 21153? WHERE ARE THE GLASSES? All of the eBay/internet references were hilarious! Actually, most of the stuff the transformers said I thought was funny because they sounded so weird. But yeah, good movie! Now. I want you to watch the following. It's a short film, which I happened to come across because I was stalking researching an actor called Josh Lawson (funny dude who appears on our show Thank God You're Here regularly). But I stumbled across this and I think it's great. It's kind of like a short story you would read here - but made into a movie. I won't say anymore because I don't want to ruin the twist at the end. Watch it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nd4c2yug76s |
| Before I say anything, you have my permission to laugh at what I'm about to say. Laugh at me, laugh with me, fall off your chair - I did it all. What could possibly be that funny? Oh, just you wait... I feel like I need a build-up. *drumroll please* The Man of Brawn....................... is gay.   (roughly the order of my reaction process).Okay, so it's not confirmed confirmed but it may as well be. He apparently told my workmate after a couple too many drinks after work one night. And then she told Shelley, who told me. But wait. There's more. He is also apparently gay WITH James, who I also work with. Now, James, I can see as gay. He's not open about it but it's kind of obvious. And his brother tells everyone anyway. But the Man of Brawn is really not your typical gay. He's well-built and manly and doesn't do anything stereotypically gay. But anyway, there you have it. Laugh away! |
| I don't have much to say today (which is quite unusual!) - I just wanted to post up my Little House on the Prairie video link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANygIiEXPnw It took longer than usual, mainly because I changed my mind about a few things and then after changing the video, changed my mind back again and had to re-do the video all over again. That's me - indecisive. And then today I kinda rushed the end a little because I go back to class tomorrow and I really wanted to have it done before then. That's the other thing - I go back to class tomorrow. Yep, bright and early.... a concept I've been highly unfamiliar with over the holidays. I'll have to get my sorry butt into bed before midnight for once so I can actually get up in the morning on time! My start of semester resolution is to get to class on time the majority of the time, unlike last semester when I wandered in anywhere from a half hour to an hour late everyday. Not that it really mattered because apparently no-one did anything for the first 15 minutes anyway because they were waiting for the teacher to get themselves organised, and besides, it actually takes me less time to get there if I leave later because I miss the peak hour traffic! So what am I meant to do?! But I also have more trouble getting a parking spot if I get there late...soooo.... *shrug* There's pros and cons. So, anyhoo - you run off now and watch my video and make me happy. I'll run off and get some sleep and make my brain happy.  |
| I've spent the last day and a bit working overtime on another "fan" video for YouTube. You'll never guess what it's on.... Little House on the Prairie - oh, you did guess? I'm enjoying thoroughly! 110%! Apart from the fact I can't find a particular scene I want to use and I can't remember whether I actually saw it on my DVDs or on YouTube, because I only have the first two seasons to work with. But anyway, it's making me a happy chappy. And the song I chose is working just wonderfully. It's a kind of family love orientated video, mixed with a little Charles and Caroline goodness - Laurie, I think you'll probably like it! Other than that, I don't really have another excuse for not blogging. I'm busy with the Week of Cheer this week and of course, the video. And just enjoying my last week off as much as I can. However, tomorrow I doubt I'll be able to work on the vid much because I'm going with my sister to check out holidays plans and bookings for my re-instated holiday to North Queensland. Yay! And last Sunday, I had a family reunion thing on. Which, of course, didn't go down without a drama or two. It's really not one of my family's reunions without drama. My grandpa got pissed at my dad because we decided to go to our own church where we live instead of going to church where my cousins live with everyone before having lunch. But I really didn't care because I didn't even go to church at all! I slept in that morning... but I didn't tell Grandpa that. haha. So my sister and I drove separately to my parents and when we got there, both my grandparents accosted and asked how uni was going. Ummm. Graduated that, my dears - I'm at TAFE now! The looks on their faces were priceless. I had thought they knew, but apparently they forgot. I quickly explained that, yes, I was aware that TAFE was a bit of a step-down from uni but I wanted to explore new avenues. Grandpa says, very confused, "but weren't you doing journalism?" Yes, yes I was. Grandma asks what I'm studying now. Again, priceless and very confused faces. So Grandma says, "so do you enjoy it?" I answer yes, very enthusiastically. "Well, that's all that matters!" Good on ya, Grandma. The other drama was that of my cousin. She seemed really depressed, barely spoke to anyone and kind of just sat by herself. Now, before I go any further...let me explain her family situation. I have an auntie and uncle who live on the top of a mountain with nine children. This particular cousin is the eldest. They were all "homeschooled" even though when we get a letter from my aunt, there are spelling mistakes throughout. All the girls wear skirts only and the boys tend to wear similar outfits. I personally think, and most of my relatives too, that it is absolutely appalling. Those kids have been so sheltered, they haven't been integrated into society. At these family reunions, the younger ones play, but the older ones just sit amongst themselves unless you go and talk to them. But anyway, what's happened now with the oldest? She's about 18 years old and she's developed anorexia. Apparently, it's been coming for some time but that fact there was something wrong was so obvious at the reunion. I thought she was just depressed, but I found out later. She wouldn't even drink a cup of tea, she apparently hates her parents and says she wants to kill herself. It's just terrible. Her parents sent her away to stay with some other family, but that didn't help so she returned home the other day. Her parents are now in marriage counselling and they've sent her to see someone too. It's just awful though because there's really nothing I can do. They live far away and I really don't know them that well. They don't do television or the internet so it's not like I can send her a supportive email. Mum suggested she come and stay with us for a weekend but how is that going to help? It's such a mess, but I knew something like this would happen to that family. They've brought up their children all wrong..... all I can really think to do is pray for her. |
| I was in the car with my parents, my dad driving, and we were travelling back home along our usual route. My parents were talking up front and I was in the back seat, staring out the window. All of a sudden, I notice something odd... my brow furrows and I lean forward to get a closer look. "Mum, Dad... is that...?" They both look, craning their heads and their eyes widen. There, in the paddock next to us is a tornado spinning and swirling its way toward us. Mum screams my dad's name in a panic and I look back in time to see him swerve off the road. Even with my seatbelt on, I'm thrown across the seat and land with a thud against the door. We swerve back onto the road again and I'm thrown back where I came from. We breathe a sigh of relief as we're safely back on the road and the tornado spins off behind us. Adrenalin pumping, we continue home. I look out the window at the paddocks and watch as the storm that came with the tornado gets worse. I look back to the road again and what I see makes my heart stop for a moment. There is a large tornado, much larger than the one we'd just avoided, right in the middle of the road. Right where we were heading. There is no escape. We cannot swerve. There is nowhere to go except into it. We get closer, it spins closer and I can see dust and a smokey fog billowing around inside it. All of a sudden, it is upon us. Dad decides to floor it. He hits the accelerator and we are launched into it. The second we are inside, it feels like we have slowed to a snail's pace. My dad still has his foot flat to the ground but we are only barely moving forward. I can feel the car being pulled upwards but we are fighting it. There is a car coming in the opposite direction. It is a man with a small boy in the backseat. The boy is leaning forward, scared, and the father is laughing from the adrenalin. I take a glance behind me and there is a girl driving a car, terrified. All three cars are placed evenly and for a moment it's like we are all suspended in slow motion, before we all exit the tornado. We conquered the upward gravity of the tornado. But in front of us is absolute chaos. We manage to drive to our turn-off, but it is impossible to get through. There are fallen trees all over the road. We stop for a moment, deciding to take the long way around..... ...... and then I woke up. I looked up the interpretation of tornado dreams, and not surprisingly, it's all about bad things. Changes in your life, uncertainty, feeling sick, can't relax, extreme stress. I suppose "changes in your life" and "uncertainty" might apply but I just think I really like storms. It was stormy a day or two before this dream and I get all excited when I there's a storm coming... and we're not getting good storms lately so maybe I'm just trying to make up for it in my dream! And I also thought that my dad played the "hero" in it and I've been thinking about him lately and how much I really do love him. So, although we didn't quite make it home, I don't think it's necessarily a bad dream. We made it out of the tornado and the adrenalin rush was fantastic! I woke up going "woooooooow, that was AWESOME!" It was so realistic! And now I know what it's like to be inside a tornado! |
| Today started off cold. I woke up at 6:45am, far more awake than usual, and managed to get out of bed by 7. I wanted to get up on time so I could make it to class at 9am and have time to get petrol beforehand. So, off I went in the measly four degrees celcius and drove an hour in peak-hour traffic to get there right on time. I got to see the last of the sunrise with beautiful fog laying low in the paddocks beside the freeway. It was quite a nice morning... and then I walked into my building to find the classroom in darkness. Class hadn't started yet! And I don't mean I was too early, I mean the semester hasn't started yet. The timetable says semester started Monday and I've been thinking I've been wagging all week. So I headed off to the library to waste some time, figure out what to do and maybe find out when class actually does start. I tried a couple friends to see if they were free for a impromptu shopping trip. They weren't, of course. They have lives. So I dialled home. Mum was at the hairdresser... so I figured I'd go and meet her (all the way back home, might I say, except no traffic this time). I waited another hour or so for her to finish - wandered around like a lost puppy in my usual hangouts when I'm trying to pass time (bookstore, jewellry - bought some earrings, CDs, pet store and the cheap-skate store). Then Mum finished and we had lunch, and while I gave her a surprise in the hairdresser - she had her eyes closed getting her hair washed and I come up quietly and go "hi Mum! - she was happy that she had some company. After lunch, we went to the pet store again and Mum decided for sure that she's getting some birds. She wants an aviary. Then we did some shopping, and that's when some pretty cool things happened. I got offered a small freelance job to create some fliers to mail out - it's for this mega-mega-expensive vase and they want to make the rich people aware of it. I also bought two new tops, which is always nice. Finally, we came home. Driving home, I could see the sky getting dark and cloudy and I get all excited when I think there's a storm coming. After I piled everything out of the car, I go back outside and just stare at the sky. It's all dark and ominous in the east and the sun is slowly starting to set in the west. All of a sudden, it starts to lightly rain and I turn away from the dark clouds to watch the rain across the sunset. Seconds pass and I turn back to the dark clouds to see the most magnificent rainbow had formed across them, right above our house! How did it get there so fast?! But it did and my jaw dropped and then all of a sudden I thought, 'CAMERA!!' I turned and bolted inside... I still had my shoes on and we have carpet, so I flung myself on the floor and struggled desperately with the clips. Finally, they were off and tore down the hall as fast as possible, grabbed the camera, tore back outside and started to snap frantically. Rainbows lose their colour fast and I didn't want it to start to fade before I got a good shot. Since it was right across from one side of the sky to the other and there are trees in the way, I couldn't quite get it's full length. I was all annoyed until I thought that I should take a photo in front of the house. I turned on my heel and ran as fast as I could... slipping on some mud on the way and doing a very ungraceful balancing manouvre but managed to stop and not fall. I got to the front of the house and...... it had faded quite significantly. It didn't look nearly as nice as it did a couple minutes ago, and after looking through the lens I decided my other photos were better after all. And here it is! It's not the best photo of a rainbow ever, but I tried my best considering my confinements (I was standing as far back as possible without morphing into the house). I was tempted to alter the colouring in Photoshop too, but I didn't. The greeny effect was natural and I suppose kind of adds to the 'storm' feel. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I've been researching a little on Michael Landon these past two days. It started because my sister bought the first two seasons of Little House on the Prairie and while watching, you fall so much in love with the show, you can't help but wonder what the real man was like. I didn't know much apart from that he had died a number of years ago from cancer. It's weird actually, I just thought I'd look him up on IMDb, find out his age and just those basic sort of things. But then I saw that he'd been married three times, had nine children, adopted three of those nine and made the comment, "I discovered too late that you can’t be a father first and a husband second. It has to be the other way around.” Now for a man to make that comment, that must be one interesting man. These days, all you hear on the current affair shows is about women trying to get their ex's to pay child support and visit them. So before long, I'd read so much about the man, I was still thinking about it long after I'd turned off the computer. I researched and researched and researched. What I found, apart from seeming to have a number of "women problems", Michael Landon was the most loving man. I don't think the way he acted with the children and animals on Little House was really an act at all. He absolutely loved kids and half the time acted like a kid himself, and you see that the affection he brought to screen was very real. When we started watching the DVDs, my mum muttered a number of times that she hoped he was nice to those kids. She can't stand the idea of kids being molested or abused on the set of a show - I'm not sure where she gets it from, but whenever there's a long running show with kids and men in it, she wonders. So, half the reason I went researching into Michael Landon's life and character was to prove her wrong. And I did. He always plays such nice, gentle characters and naturally, you want him to be the same in real life. And it seemed he was. He looked after those kids like they were his own. The girls who played Mary and Laura said whenever he was around they always felt safe. Melissa Sue Anderson, who played Mary, says, "Michael cares so much about everybody he makes you care about yourself.” There's something about him that you just can't help but be attracted to. And to think he turned out to be such a stable man, is amazing considering his childhood. His mother was basically a schizophrenic or bi-polar or something, they don't say. A quote from Michael about her really says it all: "One time when I was about fifteen years old, I was standing in front of the Triangle drugstore, talking with some guys and a couple of girls, when all of a sudden, a cab pulled up and out came my mother, standing in the freezing cold with just her nightgown on. She had a hanger in her hand and started whacking the hell out of me. She was calling the girls tramps while she was hitting me. I looked around and said to the astonished girls, ‘Well, I gotta take my mother home now.’ And we went home. She’d take an ambulance to buy a loaf of bread, and it would cost one hundred and seventy five dollars. And she was always saying she was going to kill herself. It was like, if it’s Tuesday it must be suicide day. She’d stick her head in the oven, but she always had knee pads on the floor so she wouldn’t hurt her knees, or she’d have a window open.” I mean, that's just crazy. And he lost his father when he was 21. Another quote: "Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of every day. Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows…" Okay, okay - I admit it... I have a crush about 40 years too late. But I'm not saying he was perfect. He was far from it, he definitely had his flaws. I can understand why his first marriage broke up. They married very young, and he commented that he mainly wanted to be a father to her son, whose own father had died before he was born. They divorced and he married Lynn Noe (personally though, looking at the photos... the first wife was much prettier and less high-strung ). But the way the articles and interviews read, they were soooo in love. The anger from his youth was gone, a much more settled man...yada yada. And then after 18 years of marriage, he leaves her and four kids for a 26 year old (he was 45 at the time) girl called Cindy who he met -- wait for it -- on the set on Little House where she was the make-up artist. Mid-life crisis? Yeah, probably. But, still.... Anyway, it all turns sad because as you know, he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 8 years later. I was just in tears reading the interview and I rarely cry. As much as you think of Cindy as the "younger play thing" - it breaks your heart. Especially the following: "The other night we were in bed, holding each other. And Cindy said, “Let’s just stay like this.” So we did. Her eyes were closed, and she was stroking me very gently, stroking my stomach. And I was stroking her forehead. We lay like that, holding each other, for a long while. It was a very loving time. Then she sighed a little and lay back. And I said, “Well, did you make it go away?” And she looked at me in surprise. “How did you know that’s what I was doing?” And I said, “Come on. Two people who love each other as much as we do know everything.”  It's so heart-breaking the he died so young and like that. It just makes you realise how much you appreciate your own family, especially my own dad. I love my dad more than anything. We've always got along and he's the kindest, most gentle man you could ever meet. Reading about Michael Landon even reminds me of him. They had the same gentle characters. And when I read a quote from his son, Josh, it hit home that my dad might be not doing too well either. Josh Landon said, "I said, ‘You look really tired, what’s going on?’ And he said, ‘I’m just working really hard.’ He used to have that macho, strong, I’m not sick, I’m invincible, you know, I’m gonna be all right.” I have asked Dad that before. He's getting really tired lately, I'm not sure why. He always answers the exact same thing though, that he's working hard. He'd never let on if he was feeling sick, even if he was. The other thing that made me cry, and most of all really, was this comment Michael made in his last interview: "I believe in God, I believe in family, I believe in truth between people, I believe in the power of love. I believe that we really are created in God’s image, that there is God in all of us. So I deal with the God I really know, and that’s you. When I need to ask forgiveness, I don’t ask a God up in the sky. That’s too easy. I ask you. All along, and especially recently, my beliefs have deeply disturbed some of my children, who have been terribly afraid that I will not have a place in God’s house because I do not believe that Jesus Christ was the son of God. But we’ve come to an understanding now. They understand that I have my own way, and that I can’t just change to make them feel better. God doesn’t want a hypocrite. Besides, I don’t believe that the God I know will judge me on that basis." To anyone who's a Christian, that's likely to have you in tears too. That quote more than anything, made me realise just how truly blessed I am to know God and what he did for me. Anyway, I've gone on for awhile now. I suppose the man has captured me. You don't find men like him very often anymore. A man who truly respects a woman the way he's meant to, who loves children more than himself and has a true passion for human kindness. Oh, and when I say 'respect a woman' - I say that with a grain of salt considering his divorces. But in general, I think many men need to take a leaf out of his book. I think what reading all of this has taught me, is to remember to smile and be happy! I waste so much of my time thinking about the bad things. Life is for having fun and laughing - after all, when you remember happy moments, almost all of those memories have you laughing, smiling or having fun! There is so much to enjoy in time... why waste it? More quotes: "Failing is really a matter of perspective. What is a failure to you might be a success to someone else." Charles Ingalls (LHOTP) "Remember Me" written by Michael, aired Nov 1975: (Talking to Laura about death) "That's the way you live this life, each day, one at a time. Now if you spend your whole life worrying about something that's gonna happen, before you know it, your life's over and you've spent an awful lot of it just worrying. Hey, you hear that (the sound of laughter) now that's what life's all about, laughing and loving each other and knowing that people aren't really gone when they die. We have all the good memories to sustain us until we see them again." "Remember me with smiles and laughter, for that is how I will remember you all. If you can only remember me with tears, then don't remember me at all." Photos: He looked like a cross between James Dean and Elvis Presley in his younger days, I think. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Clockwise from top left: Michael and Melissa Gilbert (Laura Ingalls); Michael and two of his kids (Leslie and Shawna, I think... but the top one could be Michael Landon Jr...lol); Michael and some cats; from Bonanza. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** The wives! Left to right: Dodie Levy-Fraser, Marjorie Lynn Noe and Cindy Clerico. http://www.geocities.com/little_jenny2001au/index.htm |
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