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I don't usually link to The Torygraph, but I am today.

The real reason why most plane seats are blue – and other curious facts about plane cabins  

The answer to almost every "Why are..." question concerning airlines is either a) It makes or saves them money, or b) some regulation requires it.

From Ryanair and British Airways to American Airlines (the world’s largest carrier), airlines across the board incorporate various shades of blue in their cabin seats, and it’s no coincidence. There does appear to be some psychology behind it.

Because blue is associated with depression, which is one of the outcomes of suffering the indignities of 21st century air travel?

Blue is associated with the positive qualities of “trust, efficiency, serenity, coolness, reflection and calm,” according to Colour Affects, the London-based consultancy run by Angela Wright, author of The Beginner’s Guide to Colour Psychology.

Funny, those are also the qualities associated with [insert your zodiac sign here]. The astrology is probably more accurate.

Nigel Goode, lead aviation designer and co-founder at Priestman Goode, which has been delivering aircraft interiors for 30 years for airlines, including most recently the Airbus Airspace cabins, states: "Our job as designers is to reinforce the airline’s brand and make it more recognisable, but our primary concern is to deliver an interior that maximises comfort to create a pleasant environment.

Well, then, you failed.

“It’s all about making the travelling experience less stressful and blue is said to evoke a feeling of calm. While some of the more budget airlines might use brasher, bolder shades, most others go with muted tones. The overarching aim is to create a home-like relaxing feel, so airlines tend to use muted colours that feel domestic, natural and earthy for that reason."

How is blue "domestic, natural and earthy?" Also, if you want to make "the traveling experience less stressful," there are less questionable ways to do it like, oh, I don't know, not packing people in like olives in a jar?

Cabin lighting is also geared towards creating a stress-free atmosphere on board, particularly in newer planes which have introduced soft LED lighting to replace the harsher light used in earlier models.

Right. LEDs not having to be replaced nearly as often, and requiring less power, has nothing to do with it.

As a general rule, most long-haul carriers won’t install leather seating because they can get unpleasantly sweaty.

Fixing this for you: because leather's more expensive.

Synthetic fabrics breathe, which makes for a more comfortable experience.

They also absorb the farts of the last slob who sat in your seat.

In fairness, I've sat in leather (I think it was faux-leather but whatever) seats on an airplane before, and the problem isn't sweat, but less friction.

“Lighter-coloured interiors, however, are more commonly found in first and business class seats, given not as many people fly in those cabins as they do in economy, where you’ll see more of the darker shades," Mr Goode explains.

That explanation makes no sense at all. There's a fixed number of each on an airplane, and these days, they're all filled. I'm betting it enforces class distinctions.

Found only on wide-body aircraft like Boeing’s Dreamliner, there is a small room hidden behind what looks like a small cupboard from the exterior.

Known as the 'crew rest', this tiny compartment opens up to a steep staircase that leads down to a few seats and bunk beds where crew members can sleep.

Et alors?

There are large areas on wide-body aircraft that are not used in the lower level, which have not been converted into seating areas because of the low height and lack of windows - both of which make the space too claustrophobic for passengers.

Quoi? That's never stopped them before.

Passenger seats with dummies strapped to them are put through the 16G test, a process which involves hurtling the seat down a 'sledge' ramp at high speeds to simulate a plane crash setting. All seats are required to withstand a 16g dynamic force.

Right, because people can withstand a 16g force.

I'm going to let the "dummies" thing slide. I'm feeling magnanimous.

Seats on many low-cost carriers like Ryanair don’t have a recline mechanism, which also adds to the weight, and others go as far as removing the seatback net for magazines to help reduce weight.

Want to start an argument online and sick of talking about Chicago "pizza?" Assert that a passenger in a reclining seat has every right to use said reclining mechanism to its fullest extent.

They do, incidentally.

“There’s a big push at the moment for the magazine pouch to be relocated just a tiny bit higher to allow just a little bit more space," notes Mr Goode.

Wow.

As an aside, for a while there, at least one airline (I think it was American) forbade passengers from sticking anything into the pouch other than the stuff that's native to it (safety card, barf bag, overpriced consumer goods ads). This was likely the most idiotic change to airplane rules since the non-smoking section (kind of like a non-pissing section in a pool, and I say that as a cigar smoker). Last time I flew that airline, though, there was no mention of this.

Anyway, snark aside, some of this stuff is interesting, whether you fly or not. Me? I used to love flying, but these days, it's nothing but a hassle. I might change my mind, though, if they relocate the magazine pouch just a tiny bit higher.