Life’s Little Misdirections 🥀🦋

Tune (Dense Melodies)

Tune Me

Slightly out of tune
discord plays daily
Black keys please my ears best
Your forehead wrinkles

Tune me
Guide my hands
over cobblestone white
building soft, fluffy melodies
your discerning ears yearn in dream

Layers of dust
pollen to these boards
mingle with hardened flesh
— impale sharp, plunge within my chest —

Tune me
Guide my eyes
to part your cloud heavens
Teach me golden dreams where you rest

If this is rust
heart repurposed
bleeds for rare return the best
Soul drum of syrup I’ll purge for you

So, tune me
Rhapsodic melodies urge
long your tender hands on mine
Teach me on my playground your tender sex

What purpose
all I’m feeling
decomposing
my hard words
in soft tune?
When iron rusts?



They break your heart unaccustomed to your form. Words inform, spoken could mean even more.

Author Note ▼

Part reflection post review from someone who should not act an authority on what others write.

Personally, I source the words employed which are dense, and the poem is not opaque (the main character/narrator on a futile quest becomes a ghost and his remains are warning, like the poem, what you seek might not be obtainable). The reviewer’s result is a generalized redaction without citing examples in feedback of a daily love labor: poetry. It would implies I mailed it in, need tuning, when hitting all sharp notes (words, themes, forms) that I like best. I’m not rusty.

So…Not everyone is a fan, but to suggest your review and low rate is intended to help a writer, I could contest. I’ll let you have your authority over my words, because you anppear to lack ears needed to self-correct, examine subtle text like mine (poem or otherwise).

I’ll know to share with someone other the next. It’s a disservice to writers to place yourself above them without your due diligence as contest operator to truly read and comprehend, and lend advice (as you say) to correct. Only worthy of your generalizations? Was it late? Tired? Too many reviews? Thought you'd skate through a few? I get the impulse.

It’s given me time to reflect. I used it productively, not pointing to it for response. Poets are tender souls. Should they break from routine to respond within a month’s time to guide their mind through a sea of words, forms to compose a thoughtful poem for contest prompt with rigid rules to collect participants entrants (which is becoming rare), low marks do not inspire writers further. Some might regress.

It’s helped me realize I no longer want to raise the specter of creating more activities, because negators like these discourage participation across the board. It’s too much for to organize groups and activities when others are above it all. Sadly, this person like others I’ve come across don’t get it, don’t get me. Ah, do you read me? I’ve read you. Do you know my style? I researched you. I just got the latest…* U-N-S-U-B-S-C-R-I-B-E*

Sorry you had to read me like this… . I am laughing…no emoji can tell how, but not derisively. It’s important enough to note the impact, however, and learn. A day or two more of final of analysis, self-correction before I move on. But, maybe not forget? I’ll shrink from sharing with people like this.